How Lost I Am
by theworldtree
Summary: Thor & Loki's story; from both points of view, and with an original plot idea inserted for the events after Loki returns home at the end of Avengers. Having forged an alliance with Thanos, Loki finds he has bitten off more than he can chew, as he struggles with his anger, villainous actions and still raw love for his family; specifically his brother, Thor. Sibling love, no slash
1. Prologue - Quest

**Hello! I've been writing this fanfic a while now, but I was a bit weary about sharing it (cause I wasnt too sure if it was any good) but in the end I figured I should put it up on here to see what people make of it! I've had a bit of a chapter shuffle; I realised that my first two chapters were like 3 times the size of all the chapters following! D: but now I'm a bit more used to the website itself, I know there isnt a chapter limit or what have you so I've broken the chapters up a bit to fix this :)**

**I have also been reading other stories and noticed that disclaimer notes were being used so I've gotta say; I dont own Marvel or their characters!  
****Thankyou to you all who've been reading and reviewing, and the little bit of maintenence is over now so ze story can be read as normal! Hope you like!**

* * *

The beautiful skies of Asgard were dark and swirling on the night its princes found themselves lost among the wild and untamable trees of the outer forest. Only a day prior, they had been readying themselves for the hunting feat that would mark their ascension into the royal standard of adolescence. Thor and Loki, the sons of the King and Allfather Odin, had much to prove in their quest to please their father and endear themselves, as royalty, to the kingdom. At the tender ages of twelve and ten respectively, they bore the greatest responsibility conceivable for ones so young to bear, the burden of princehood heavy upon their small shoulders.

This weight was particularly immanent for Thor, for as the firstborn, the throne fell first to his inheritance. Although he was the paraded and most crowd pleasing of the two princes, it was no secret that Thor's confidence and bravado would falter were it not for the reassuring presence of his younger brother by his side. Where he had physical talents and a budding warriors skill, his brother possessed a profound intellect and a growing aptness for the mystical arts. Different though they were both physically and mentally; Thor being blue-eyed, blond and sturdy with an attack-first, think-later attitude while the dark and slender Loki possessed a methodical and analytical thought process to any situation behind his emerald eyes, the bond between the brothers was undeniable.

When, on the rare occasions they saw fit to apply their shared skills together, the two boys had proved that united, they truly became an unstoppable force. Although they often bickered and fought over their varying opinions and actions in life, when all was said and done, they relied on each other as waves rely on the moon. They were two sides of the same coin. The affection and support they shared was an ever present vein that lay just beneath the skin of their tumultuous lives, and though it never saw the occasion to bring itself to light in the mundane daily routine of royal life, this newest venture of which they were about to embark threatened an opportunity for this connection between them to make itself known.

* * *

"Loki! Loki! Have you packed your satchel yet? The night almost falls and Father wishes us to get a full nights rest before we leave at dawn tomorrow!" Thor called as he reached the door of the chambers he shared with his brother, pushing the heavy door open and plodding inside. As he entered, the first thing he noticed was that, although his brothers belongings were packed and present on his bed, Loki was not. Thor sighed and shoved his hands on his hips petulantly. "Loki, no tricks tonight, we really must be ready. When we enter that forest it is going to be just you and I, no servants or guards to protect us. It will be our responsibility to bring home that which Father expects of us." He called impatiently, his eyes darting across the room from Loki's side to his own, where he desperately wanted to drop down and sleep.

His statement was met with silence, as Thor began pacing the length of the room, drawing back the great crimson curtains hoping to reveal his brother concealed within. When this attempt proved to be fruitless, Thor returned to his side of the chamber and succumbed, throwing himself on his bed and climbing under the covers exasperatedly. "Fine. Keep up your trickery. If you wish to be weary when we arise and meet with Father tomorrow, then on your head be it." The short silence that followed seemed so extensive that Thor began to wonder if perhaps his brother was not still in their room after all, the thought of which aggravated him further as he had no desire to embark upon another one of his Loki searches of the palace in the dark hours of the night. He would have believed that such an act was beginning to be imminently required if the silence had not suddenly been broken by a disembodied voice that originated from the bed opposite him.

"Truly brother, you allow me to have no fun! Although I am satisfied that you were beginning to think I was not in your presence after all". Thor crumpled his youthful face in annoyance as the grinning form of his younger sibling materialized out of thin air on the bed next to him. "I knew you were here Loki. I always know when you are close at hand. I can feel it in the air and in my gut, although I may see fit to disbelieve it. There's no escape for me from you. It is nice to see that you are gaining an enhanced grip on your magic however. Less chance of a repeat of the 'out of control multiplying' problem you had during bathing time when we were younger. Father recalls it was not a pleasant situation for me, being compressed in the barrel with eight of you" Thor teased wickedly, before defecting the blow of the pillow Loki had sent catapulting in his direction with a quick thrust of his forearm. "That was when we were infants Thor, I have a MUCH greater control of it now. So mind what you say or I may see fit to vaporise you!" Loki replied huffily, clamouring under the thick, warm quilts of his own bed and staring up at the ceiling in annoyance.

"You could never do that" Thor retaliated in a quieter tone, conscious of the hour and of their parents chambers close by as he shifted onto his side, facing his brothers bedstead. "You don't have THAT sort of power, not yet anyway" he chuckled softly. "Plus, whatever would you do without me? You would be lost! A destitute soul, I dread to think of you staying up sleepless nights missing me and thinking 'oh how I wish I hadn't vaporised my dear brother, he and I used to have jolly good laughs at this hour and now I have no one to keep me company and shall die with boredom!'" Thor laughed heartily, burrowing himself deeper into the cocoon of his quilts. Trying to maintain a dismissive fixture, Loki turned his head to the side to glance at Thor, where he could just make out the round face of his brother in the dark, eyeing him amusedly from across the small space between them. Feeling his tough guy act falling around him once again, as it often did when Thor caught him out, he could only surmass a frustrated and sleepy "shut up" before he yanked his covers around him and tossed over to face the opposite direction. Thor proceeded to do the same, smiling at his victory, before he was finally enveloped and carried away by the dreamy wave of a deep sleep.

* * *

The dawn that broke the next again morning was one of the most unnerving that either boy had ever experienced. Both Thor and Loki had risen, rested and prepared for the quest they were about to face, and were both equally reluctant to disembark, although their typical sibling rivalry forebode them from revealing this fact to the other. Thor, specifically, had his self-assured game face on, chattering insistently about the noble nature of their duty and the rewards they would reap upon their return. Loki was used to this over-zealous candour that his brother always adapted before any royal duties that would put him in the public eye, and although he bore it with a grudgingly passive attitude as he always did, today it seemed almost reassuring in its ferventness.

After double checking they had acquired all the belongings and equipment they would need, both boys made their way to the door of their chambers in an almost too formal fashion for two young children, stopping before it and waiting to be called in relative silence. The atmosphere surrounding them was so rife with anxiousness that it was threatening to become unbearably awkward, before Thor broke it by sparing a sideways look at his brother, who had mirrored his action simultaneously. Catching each others eye, the boys could only manage to exchange two fleeting, but supportive, smiles at one another before the royal guards sounded the horn and opened the doors to escort the princes to the throne room. His nerves swelling into a ball in his chest, Thor held back and allowed his younger brother to exit in front of him, before catching up behind, having noticed that the back of Loki's tunic was hanging loose over his belt. After endearingly tucking it in before they reached the presence of the court, he proceeded to fall into his brothers step as they approached the entrance to the throne room.

Reaching the doors, they heard the booming voice of their father, King Odin, announcing their arrival. "Subjects of the Royal Asgardian Court, I now present to you, on the date of this glorious ritual of our kingdom, where manhood and worth is put to the test, the sons of Odin, your King and Allfather; Thor and Loki: the Princes of Asgard." The hall was enraptured by the respectful applause of all those present as the twosome graciously filed into the room, acknowledging their reception in their usual fashion; Thor winking and waving exuberantly at their audience while Loki bowed his head dutifully, flashing them all a small, guarded smile, before the boys came to a halt before their father. As was expected, both descended onto one knee, their right arms crossed across their chests in the royal salute as they awaited their fathers command.

"Thor Odinson, Loki Odinson" Odin began, descending the stairs that separated his throne from where his sons awaited. "On this glorious day you will embark upon your first imperial quest. It is a day of great honour. And of great risk." He paused before the two boys, who both looked up at him with identical expressions of veiled concern behind their young eyes. Registering this, he retreated back a few paces, before raising his staff, Guignir, a few inches off the ground and bringing it down three times upon the marble floor. "Guards, members of the court. With my apologies, I have decided that I wish to speak with my sons in privacy on this occasion. Please leave us."

Obediently, the room slowly began to dissipate in the wake of Odin's words, until only he and his sons remained. Thor and Loki rose to their feet. "My sons" Odin acknowledged in a considerably softer tone, replacing Guignir in its hold next to the throne before turning and moving closer. "I understand how intimidating this venture may seem for you. But know that I have no reason to doubt your abilities, and so neither should you. I have every faith that you will succeed." Stopping before them, he extended his arms gracefully, placing his firm right hand on Thor's shoulder, and his left upon Loki's. "Know that although the objection of the quest may be to hunt the eagle of the west and bring it home, that may not be the only goal you achieve." Odin allowed a flicker of a smile to ghost upon his lips as his two children glanced up at him, bewildered by his expression.

"My only advice to you, as your father, is to know that you are at your strongest when you are together." He continued seriously. "It is only by combining your talents that you will discover the power and potential to gain your objective. Do not make the mistake, as so many have, of believing that relying upon another is a sign of weakness. For rather, it can be your greatest strength. I have seen the bond between you, my boys. Everything you are, everything you have learned, will be put to the test. It is up to you both to apply your assets advantageously." Thor and Loki exchanged a swift flick of the eye as they absorbed their fathers words, before Odin drew back ceremoniously, preparing to allow them to leave. The boys readied themselves as calmly as they could, bowing to their father in acknowledgement and turning to depart through the throne room doors to the court members and horses awaiting outside. Odin called out to them once more, his final words of guidance just leaving his lips before his sons disappeared from view. "Look after each other."

* * *

Several hours after the accompanying party had left him and his brother on the edge of the forest, Thor had begun to find that his nerves were gradually calming. He and Loki both had worked out a rough path through the section of the wood on which to track the whereabouts of the eagle they were to claim as their prize. Still, they had come across no inclination of such a creature being anywhere nearby. Although Thor knew it was far too early on into the quest to be expecting otherwise, he was still apprehensive when he noted the night beginning to fall over the vast expanse of the treetops. The sky had begun to meld and darken into a violet blue, and he could make out the constellations beginning to visualise. He became suddenly aware of the darkness snaking down eerily upon the thick undergrowth, like an unwanted veil of menacing intent. He hadn't thought of it being dark.

_It is fine._ He thought to himself vehemently._ I am the future thunder god. Odin's son. Darkness does not scare me. I am stronger than that._His young mind repeated this statement over and over, as if convincing himself that this foolish and childish emotion he was starting to feel was simply an apparition; a test put upon him to see if he would buckle and cry at the first sign of danger. He gripped his sword firmly and sniffed deeply, attempting to level out the disruption his mind was causing him. It was only when he approached a promising possibility of a catch, which turned out to be simply an average species of bird that dwelled within the forest, that he realised that Loki was not at his side. Straightening up, he automatically scanned the area around him, which was becoming darker and darker, only Loki was nowhere close to his eye's gaze.

As he registered the coming darkness and the dangers that lay within the woods, a pang of fear like no other he had ever felt in his life throbbed into his chest, almost crippling him with its intensity. He had lost his brother. His little brother was out there somewhere, lost in this mass tangle of blackened trees, all alone. Anything could happen to him Thor thought, his whole body going almost numb with insufferable waves of worry and guilt. He spent a small while, maintaining as calm a posture as a boy his age could manage, looking around and calling for his brother nearby, before he could keep his composure no longer. Verging on hysteria, he began to charge his way through the undergrowth, hacking away at the vines and obstacles that blocked his path with an urgency and determination that had never before been so prominent in his nature.

"Loki! LOKI!" Thor bellowed wildly, feeling the sting of tears piercing the back of his eyelids as he finally came crashing to a halt, seeing only black and distorted shapes all around him. He was terrified himself. The shapes looked like monsters, creatures awaiting to torture and devour him. But somehow, this fear held no candle to the scale of terror he felt at the thought of something horrific happening to his little brother. He had never felt so protective and agonizingly desparegent of someone else as long as he had lived. He sank to his knees, exhausted, as the well of tears he had held back for what seemed like a lifetime spilled over and trickled down his cheeks. He knew that in this situation, he would be expected to return to the guards that awaited outside the forest. He would be expected to leave the finding of his brother to them, and accept his powerlessness. But he could not accept it. They were too far away, and he did not know how far his brother had gone. By the time they reached him, if they even did at all, it could be too late. He could not give up on finding Loki himself and making sure he was safe. By this point, he had been searching for hours in the cold and perilous darkness and had still found no sign of him. He had forgotten why they had even come to this dreaded place to begin with. Whatever it was, it was certainly not worth experiencing this pain, this harrowing dread that he had lost his brother for good. He couldn't begin to comprehend how torturous an existence that would be. He didn't know how he would function.

When thoughts of such a situation inevitably pushed themselves into his mind as the hours of the night melted away, he would close his eyes and force them out, refusing to acknowledge their presence. His brother was not gone. His brother was lost. And if his brother was lost, he was going to find him. No matter how long it took, no matter what agony he endured, Thor would never give up until he found his little brother and brought him back. He promised himself this, over and over as he struggled to clear his mind from all the pessimistic thoughts that were attempting to infect it, cell by cell. Each hour that passed seemed like a day, and although it was only halfway through the night, Thor felt as if he had been searching the wildness for millennia, his battling thoughts stretching out before him with each second, strand by strand, like a raw nerve. Sometimes he would convince himself that he hadn't lost Loki at all, that he was still close by, shrouded in his invisibility once more, playing one of his typical, if uncalled for pranks. And when this thought entered his mind, his hand would reach out instinctively for his brother as he closed his eyes and willed himself to feel his presence. But he never could. He knew well that this pitiful hope was only that, and nothing more.


	2. Prologue - The Forest

Eventually, Thor threw himself onto the ground in frustration, just before the opening of a gaping crevasse that scarred the landscape before him. Feeling his body begin to shudder with hopeless sobs, he pulled his legs up and wrapped his arms around his knees, resting his head upon them. He looked like a vulnerable child. In this moment, he was. It was only after a few moments of gently snuffling into his legs in desperation, that he began to hear a matching sound of dismay coming from somewhere close-by. At first he thought it may have just been the reverberations of his own cries, but after holding his breath and forcing himself to quieten, he realised with a surge of attention that it was not. There was another person close at hand. Only one word came searing into his mind._ Loki_. He scrambled onto all fours urgently, crawling towards the noise with all the strength he could muster. He hadn't eaten. He was exhausted. He was weak. But that noise, that hallowed sound that could only be, had to be, his brother, filled him with a refueled sense of purpose and determination, after hours of nothingness. He pulled himself to the edge of the gorge and looked around him. He couldn't see anyone. With a profound sense of dread, he proceeded to turn his gaze downwards, into the gaping hole that lay below him.

It was there that he saw the tuft of black hair, balancing precariously on a small ledge that jutted out over the vast expanse of the chasm. His heart convoluted violently in his chest, tingles of shock seeping down his arms and legs. His brother was there. Right before his eyes. He fought to keep his shaky voice from breaking as he called down to him, relief and concern and fear all consuming him at once. "Loki. Loki! It is Thor! I am here!" he cried biting his lip to prevent the newest surge of tears from cascading down his cheeks. He had to be strong. Upon hearing Thor's voice, the tuft of black hair tilted his head backwards to look up at him, revealing the glistening emerald eyes of his brother, just visible in the dark. Although he couldn't see much of Loki's face in the darkness, Thor could tell how frightened he was. "Thor" came his brothers tenuous reply, as he grappled to come as close to him as he could, digging his fingers into the loose dirt that coated the wall of the crevasse, as if to try and pull himself up, even though he knew such an act was useless. "I am sorry. I thought I had heard something in the distance, I only meant to stray a short way from the path. I followed a false trail and was lost." Loki's voice shook as he removed one of his arms from the wall and wiped his sweat covered brow with the back of his grubby sleeve. "I came too close and the ground gave way. I thought I would never be found." Thor tried to make his panicked voice sound as level as he could before replying.

"Brother, it is okay. It does not matter how you came to be here, what matters is that I am here now, and I am going to get you out." Determined, Thor proceeded to extend his arm downwards towards his brother, pushing himself as far beyond the edge as he could possibly go, hooking a foot through a thick root that protruded from the surface of the ground for stability. "Take my hand!" he shouted insistently, stretching each muscle in his arm and fingers out as much as he could in his attempt to reach him. Loki responded urgently, heaving himself up and reaching up his hand as much as he possibly could in return. He groaned with pain as he strained himself further and further upwards, but still his fingertips remained a few inches shy of his brothers. Cursing in frustration, Loki began to throw himself fiercely against the muddy wall, attempting to gain some sort of foothold with which he could pull himself closer. As he attempted this a third time, the loose ground hanging down the edge gave way, sending a filthy cloud of debris hurling over Loki, and sweeping him downwards. Horrified, Thor struggled even further over the edge, shouting deafeningly in anguish. As he was carried back down the small distance to the ledge, Loki thrust out his arms to stop himself in defiance. In doing so, his arms and body were sent slamming into the edge of the outcropping with a sickening crack that echoed up and down the chasm, drilling into Thor's young ears a sound that he would never quite forget.

As the dust settled, Thor struggled to peer though the cloud to see his brother, who was groaning in pain as he scrambled his legs beneath him to push himself up and over onto the ledge once more, where he rolled over onto his back, clutching his right forearm. A wash of relief came over Thor as he saw his brother had managed to climb back onto the outcropping. This soon turned to dread however, when he fully registered his brothers cries of pain. Loki lay clutching his right arm, as blood began to seep through the fabric of his sleeve. With a twinge of horror, Loki had noticed that, in throwing his arms out to protect himself, his right arm had been dragged over the sharp and craggy rocks jutting out of the side of the ledge, leaving a deep, trickling gash from his shoulder to his elbow. The surface injury on this arm was ghastly enough, but the searing pain he felt singed through them both. He knew that he had also done considerable damage to both arms internally, whether they be sprained, or fractured or broken. Either way, his arms were no longer useful, barely even functional. The pit in Thor's stomach churned as the image of his brother lying in agony, just beyond his reach, came to him. He could not bear it. The air around him began to grow cold, and he could sense a damp in the atmosphere. A flash storm was coming. The weather here was nothing if not wild and unpredictable. He knew that within moments, it would have no hesitation in sweeping his brother away, for good this time.

He looked down upon Loki with distressed eyes as he realised what had to be done. What he had to ask Loki to do in order to save him. His magic was drained as he was, there was no other option. His brothers healing abilities would be severely impaired; useless, as would his. He knew this to be so. Thor felt himself tremble with horror as he addressed his brother, in as soothing a voice as he could summon. "Loki" he began delicately, before his brother cut him off abruptly. "You do not have to say it, brother" Loki gasped, in between the stabs of pain that were shooting up his arms. "I am not a fool. I know what must be done." He pulled himself uneasily to his feet, steadying himself and blinking through the white hot flashes of pain that now seemed to be aiming to cripple his whole body. Blood continued to trickle down his arm, as he fought to keep level headed. He didn't even have anything substantial to stem the flow, save for the dirty material of his shredded sleeve. A pool of fear gathered within him as he looked upwards at the face of his older brother for reassurance. He was going to have to jump. Jump and hope that he caught Thor's hand, and didn't plunge to his death. Jump and know that even if he did, he would have to endure the unspeakable torture of having his whole body weight pulling on his splintered arms. He wasn't sure if he'd even be able to cope with that level of suffering. He was only a child after all, and no child should ever have to go through such an ordeal. But of course, he wasn't an ordinary child. And neither was his brother. _Why were they here? To catch some stupid bird for a pointless quest that they had already proved to have failed?_The relative meditation that Loki had been managing to maintain began to crack, as he felt all of his tangled emotions force their way out via the mud streaked marks that lined his boyish face. He moved his fingers naturally to clench his fists to stem his tears, only to wince at the hurt it caused him to do so.

He wasn't going to make it. He wasn't strong enough. He wasn't brave enough. _It would be easy for Thor._ He thought wistfully, kicking his feet in shame. _He fears nothing. He is tough, he would get himself out with ease. What use am I?_ Loki pressed his eyelids shut, trying desperately to blot out all of his scathing thoughts. "Loki" he finally heard a voice, bringing him back to the world around him. "Loki" His eyes flew open as he looked up once again at the ever-present form of his brother. "I am so sorry" Thor proclaimed frantically "I am so sorry that you have to do this, but there is a storm coming. By the time I go to get the guards, it will be too late. It will hurt, but I swear to you that I will not let you fall. I will get you out of here. Do you understand me?" Loki broke his brothers gaze, looking uncertainly down into the blackness of the deep hole below him. "Listen to me Loki. Look at me!" Thor cried desperately, in an attempt to wrench Loki's thoughts from the unthinkable. Loki obeyed, turning to lock his brothers eyes once more. "Everything will be alright. We can get through this. As long as you trust me, we will be okay. You are not going to die. I forbid it. Mark my words, we will be back home, fighting over the last apple once again before you know it, as we always do." Thor smiled weakly. Truthfully, he did not know if he would even have the strength to pull up his brother. He was drained of stamina himself. He did not know if Loki would even make it to his hand. But all he knew was that he had to trust Loki to do so, as Loki had to trust Thor to catch him. It was all they had. And if it failed, they would go down together, for Thor knew that if his little brother was fated to plunge into a dark abyss and meet his death, then he sure as Hel wasn't going to let him fall alone.

* * *

Thor could hear the thunder before it came, a precursor to his future talents that fortunately provided him with a small advantage in his impossible situation. He leaned downwards and reached out his hand once more towards his brother. "Just look at me Loki. Keep your eyes on me, and I will catch you." He spoke firmly. Loki looked up hesitantly into the comforting eyes of his big brother, who evoked the same warmth and calmness he had always been able to instill in Loki's wild nature when he had needed to. It was now or never. Taking one last long look at his brother, Loki took a step backwards, before bracing himself and summoning the last of his strength to propel himself forwards and upwards towards Thor's outstretched hand. He seemed to be suspended like a puppet, floating in the air above the sea of nothingness for an eternity. He was certain he was going to fall. His eyes even closed instinctively in preparation for what was to come. "LOKI!" He heard his brothers screams ring hysterically in his ears as he traveled through the air. He was gone. And then, he was not. Every sense in his body was suddenly prised open by the poker hot surge of undiluted agony that scorched his crippled arm, as his body jerked and pulled down upon the iron-like fist that gripped him like a vice.

Thor had caught him. And he could spare no more restraint to ignore his pain. He was a child, and he was sore. He allowed himself to howl in agony, his eyes growing swollen and puffy as he felt every stab of pain pierce his arm and course through his body like a seizure as his brother began to heave him upwards. He couldn't grip his hand back. His fingers weren't moving. His legs dangled helplessly above the void, his entire life held by a shattered thread in his brothers hands. He wanted to pass out with the pain. Suddenly, as Thor had predicted, it began to rain. Heavily. Or rather, it was more like hail, as the temperature plummeted more and more. Even as it battered upon him and threatened to slack his hold, Thor grasped Loki's arm tightly, biting back the strain, as he knew how much pain his brother was in. He could almost feel it throbbing under his skin as he clutched his blood-soaked arm with both hands. And still Loki strove to raise his other, allowing Thor to clasp that too, whimpering as he did so, but allowing it all the same. His brother was so brave. He was so young, and he couldn't imagine how much he must be hurting.

Thor's heart contracted with pride, even in spite of the awfulness of the circumstances._ I do not know if I could have endured such a thing._He pulled and pulled further, as Loki's sobs grew fainter and fainter. At last, he got his brother far enough up to the edge that he could release his arms and shift his hold to across his chest instead. Loki's heart was thumping. He could feel it through his back against his, and it comforted him to know that while the rest of his body appeared to be motionless, his brothers' heart was still fighting. Loki's arms fell limp at his sides as Thor moved, pushing and pushing his feet against the ground as he hauled him up to safety. Finally, he succeeded, and he and Loki rolled over in a tumble onto the safe, muddy embankment that bordered the cliff. By now, the sky was rumbling in its charcoal pallet, sending rain and sleet spitting over the land in violent torrential droves. But Thor didn't, couldn't, notice. After ripping up a piece of cloth and binding it tightly around Loki's open wound, he clutched the shuddering and silent form of his brother in his embrace, holding him so tightly he never thought he could let him go. "It is alright. It is alright brother. It is over. It is over now. I have got you."

Cradling Loki's head in his arms, he rocked back and forth, tears streaming down his face and mingling with the rainwater, as he buried his face in his brother's drenched and freezing hair. After a while, he felt a gentle movement beneath his arms as Loki slowly, and groggily, wiggled himself upright, as Thor kept a caring hand on his shoulder. It was still stained with Loki's blood, but the rain had begun to wash it off, as if it sought to soothe the turmoil that the two boys had just endured. They looked at each other with the purest and rawest display of a child's emotion and vulnerability as they fully absorbed what had just transpired. "We made it." Thor breathed, a frail smile curving at the corners of his mouth. Even through his pain, which was still relentless in racking though his body even now, Loki managed to exchange Thor's smile. Overcome with emotion, Thor reached out and protectively pulled his little brother close again, wrapping his arms around him, the relief of having him there coursing through him like a warm blanket. And in spite of the fact that it caused him scrutinizing further agony every time he moved, Loki did the same, allowing the little boy that he was to take comfort in his big brother in his time of need. At that moment, everything, the world around them, shrunk into insignificance as they held each other, two children, alone and terrified in the dark and vast expanse of the unknown. It did not matter. The lightning in the sky flashed vibrantly as Thor's emotions rose, as did the land around them begin to blossom with grass as Loki's did the same. They felt their powers heighten in incredulity as they stared at each other, awestruck. Their father had been right. They were each others strength.

* * *

"You have more bravery than anyone I have ever known, brother. You will have done Father proud, I am sure" Thor finally spoke thickly as the boys huddled together as the rain continued to pour. Loki smiled falteringly. "I was the one that got lost. I do not know that Father would approve of that. Yet you still came after me and gave up the quest?" Thor grinned. "Well I could not just leave you to die could I? What sort of brother or prince would I be if I did?" Looking at Loki, Thor noticed that there was something troubling him. Even in the midst of extreme shock and physical pain, Loki still had the ability to wonder. He shook his head in slight disbelief before turning to his brother inquisitively. "What is on your mind, brother?" Loki shifted slightly, fumbling absent-mindedly with the makeshift bandage on his arm, before wincing at the pain that shot though him as he did so. He stared into the distance in thought, his green eyes mulling over the contents of his next sentence before he spoke it aloud.

"Can you promise me something?" he said finally, turning to look at Thor with the innocent and vulnerable visage of the child he was, that he had never shown before this night. Thor swallowed hard, taking in the sheer openness of his brother's manner, of which he was not accustomed, before agreeing. "Promise me" Loki began, his glassy eyes addressing Thor sombrely from beneath his raven hair. "Promise me that if this happens again, you will be there." Thor looked at Loki, taken aback by the oddness of his request. His level of pain must be clouding his mind. "Promise me" Loki continued, "That if I get lost again, no matter how far I go, or how lost I become, you will always come to find me. Promise me that you will still search for me even when all seems hopeless and bring me back as you did tonight. Promise me you will not give up, even if it hurts me so much that I want to scream. Promise me that you will always be there to save me, even when I do not believe I need saving."

As Loki finished, Thor could only gape at his brother in astonishment. His wish was so child-like, so vulnerable, and yet at the same time it contained a plea, a foreboding wisdom of one that could only be described as older than their years. He just could not place a finger on why it struck him so. But Loki was looking at him, waiting imploringly for his response. "Of course" he replied softly. "I promise." The two boys smiled at each other feebly as Loki began to feel drowsy with pain once more. At that moment, they caught each other in fright and smirked in recognition as two crows squawked past, landing on a nearby tree. They were soon accompanied by the sound of rustling in the trees as Thor and Loki helped each other stumble to their feet. Their Father had arrived to bring them home.


	3. Thor On The Helicarrier

Thor swallowed down the onslaught of horror and regret that laid siege to his heart as he watched his younger brother smirk and threaten from behind the walls of his glass prison. _It should not be like this. It cannot be like this. _He remembered everything his brother had done. How he had turned against him. How he had set his web of lies and deception into motion before his very eyes. How he had planned to commit horrendous deeds in his pursuit of power. How he had goaded Thor into battle. How he had spat out his professions of hatred and loathing, attacking with such barbarous words that were his specialty; words that hurt Thor more than any number of blades or arrows ever could. He remembered that he had realized, despite what his brother had done, that he could never cease to give him his love, and never would.

He remembered Loki's eyes filling with tortured tears as he allowed the utterance of a few meaningless words to eradicate their entire lives together; to justify who he had become. _I am not your brother._He remembered how Loki's hardened face reverted to an expression of frightened vulnerability as he hung off the broken Bifrost, above the bottomless void between worlds, where almost certain death lay beneath. He remembered the pleading for acceptance. His Father uttering the words that caused Loki's connection to his family to break once and for all, the fragile ties shattering around them in the air. He remembered hearing his own screams ringing in his ears as he called to his brother, as Loki released his grip on the staff that joined them and allowed himself to fall into nothingness. He remembered how the recollection of the promise he had made Loki long ago burned in his mind, as he felt his life as he knew it collapse around him.

He remembered struggling to follow his brother into the abyss, to save him from his solitude, but being reprimanded by the harsh grip of his Father's fist upon his ankle. He remembered wishing that he had caught Loki by the hand, as he had done on that long ago night when they were children. He would never have allowed him to let go, as he had done then. He would have pulled him up and embraced him with open arms. He would have apologised for abandoning him, for failing to see or acknowledge his suffering. He would have told him how much he needed him. How much he was loved. He would have told him that he forgave him his actions, and would not rest until he had vanquished the demons that tormented his soul. He would have fought to release and reignite the spark of his brothers true self that he knew was still there, buried beneath the shell of anger and jealousy that had consumed him. He would bring his brother home, and they would rule side by side, as was always meant to be.

And then he remembered his reality crumbling, as he struggled to come to terms with the fact that his brother was gone, and that he had done nothing to stop it. He remembered the moment of pure relief that had enveloped him when he realised he had survived the fall into the void, and the consequent horror that replaced it when he saw the dark creature he had become in his absence. As these thoughts swirled around in Thor's mind, his heart sank as he registered the weight of the question that connected them all._ What If?_Those two simple words tortured him so much he could barely stand it; poking and prodding at his brain as he listened to the man whom he could barely recognize; the man who wore the face of his younger brother, but vied to torment him, as he continued to snarl and terrorize Thor's companions.

As the video camera shut off, and the room which contained the superhero group that had come to be known as 'the Avengers' fell silent, Thor stared at the floor, aggressively forcing back his emotions as he allowed the discussions between his fellow team-mates to commence. They talked of Loki as but a foe, as a psychotic murdering madman who had to be dealt with. Their voices were professional. Clear in their intent. "You can smell the crazy off of him" Bruce had said. Even standing there, after all that had happened between them, after Loki had lied and even attempted to kill him, Thor could not bear to hear anyone speak ill of his brother. He had been forced by his own subconscious to retort in Loki's defence, even though he could sense the resentment he was receiving from the rest of the room for doing so. The Avengers all sat together around the circular table before them, but despite being asked, Thor remained standing. He did not know if this symbolised the reality of his detachment from them; the fact that, regardless of founder Nick Fury's claims that they were all the same and fought for the same cause, his undeniable and still-raw connection to Loki, the villain they sought to destroy, would always set him apart.

The more Thor dwelled upon it, the more he understood that this had to be; for he could never truly share their ideals. He could never truly indulge in the bonds that one inevitably forms when faced with a common enemy. For he did not, would not, could not, see his sibling as an enemy. When the rest of the Avengers looked at Loki, they simply saw him as a deranged villain, a calculating monster who sought nothing but the destruction of Earth and its people, who aimed to bring them to their knees. A threat that must be removed. But as hard as he tried to share their view, the fact remained that when Thor looked at Loki, he could only allow himself to see the image of his little brother. He saw the food fights they had at the feasts as children; he saw the boy whose mischievous laughter he had fought to suppress as they played hide and seek with the servants before bed; he saw the boy whom he had cuddled up into their Mother with as she read them both a bedtime story on nights when they couldn't sleep.

He saw the frightened boy who had been so brave in the face of such unimaginable pain and terror; the boy who he had huddled with against the wild rains of the Asgard forest; the boy who had made him promise that he would always be there for him. The boy who he grew up alongside, though childhood, adolescence and into adulthood. He saw the man he had fought beside and laughed beside. He could never see what they saw. He could never look at Loki and not feel his heart bursting with remorse, and guilt, and love. He could not just see him as a threat that had to be destroyed for the greater good, no matter how hard he tried. It was easy for these people to dismiss Loki as just another target that had to be taken care of. They had no connection to him, they didn't know him, or grow up with him, they weren't even from the same world as him. They only saw what was before their eyes. A villain. Thor almost envied their ignorance, for he imagined it would be bliss, to be able to treat the situation with such an efficient attitude that was not burdened with emotional turmoil. To not be tortured by the ghosts of the past every time they looked upon his face.

* * *

As the Avengers continued to discuss his brother in openly discontented and hostile tones, Thor fought to suppress a reaction that he knew would threaten the stability of the group. It was unbelievable that none of them seemed to care, or even remember when they spoke, that it was one of their team-mates' brother; his family, that they were casually talking about disposing of as they sat sipping caffeinated drinks from their white plastic cups. None of them ever thought to spare a moment to process how this must be affecting him, to reassure him that there was hope, to even ask him anything at all about his brother except what he knew about him in order to determine his weaknesses. In short, they saw Thor's relationship to Loki as simply an asset; a potential strategy that they might be able to utilise in order to bring him down. They never really looked at Thor's face throughout their discussions, for if they did, they would have seen the conflict within him; the ever-present battle of love and hate, the predicament of choosing between the greater good and the relationship with ones' family.

The only person who had ever seemed to be able to penetrate Thor's strong exterior and see beyond it, the only person who would have cared and saw fit to remediate his current quandary as he stood in that room, was his brother. But where that version of Loki now was, Thor did not know. He knew for certain that he was not simply confined within that glass prison, but perhaps rather within two prisons, captured and contained within his own mind and soul by the walking scar he had allowed himself to become._ How could I have let him turn into this?_These people didn't know Thor at all. He was truly an alien in this room; an outsider. Despite their protestations of being a team, of being a family, Thor could never really belong amongst them.

The Loki he knew, he was the one with whom Thor felt he belonged; he was the one that gave him strength, and who he gave strength to in return. This ersatz family he had joined was indeed, for all intents and purposes, just that. Fake. Comparisons were easily made when he had experienced the true meaning of working with and relying upon someone else. To have been one half of a whole for so long. And to have had that person cruelly ripped away for good by a Fathers secret; a secret that meant less than nothing, that was just a few mere words, and yet had the power to tear down a thousand years of brotherhood, to sever the bond they had shared, everything they had built, everything they had, was more than Thor could bear. He carried it with him every moment of his existence, like the staggering weight of the entire world was pressing down upon his shoulders.

"If you ask me, Goldilocks here should've learned how to keep his little bro in check and kept his family problems on his own planet instead of messin' up mine." The disparaging comment that Tony Stark had uttered was enough to break Thor from his isolated revelry, as he turned his head automatically to glare at him in resentment. "You know nothing of which you speak, little man." He replied defensively, gripping his hammer, Mjolnir, even tighter in has right hand. The rest of the Avengers looked cautiously from Thor to Tony, who had raised an eyebrow and was eying Thor in his usual narcissistic style. "Oh sorry, I forgot I was dealing with the Shakespeare brothers." Tony retorted with a smirk, pushing back his chair and lifting his feet up to rest on the table, crossing one over the other. "Well you know what they say; behind every great lunatic is an arrogant big brother that made him that way!" Thor felt the rage bubbling inside him as he processed Tony's remark. In his youth, he would have swung for him on the spot. But he had learned much since then. He was not worth making a scene over. Thor simply gritted his teeth and turned away. He could tolerate the conversation, nay, this room, no longer. "Inform me if there are any changes" he said quietly to Fury, before striding out of the room, leaving Tony and the rest of the Avengers staring after him in silence.

Thor had retreated to a room near the back of the hanger, one which simply contained a computer monitor and a sturdy metal bench against the back wall, upon which Thor had lowered himself, placing Mjolnir on the ground next to him. He knew that if he wanted to, he could turn on the monitor and watch his brother again from the camera in his cell. But he could not. He had an image of his brother in his mind, and that was how he wanted to see him. Not the person he had become now; the person who evoked only menace, the person whom he couldn't bear to look on for longer than a moment unless he had to. It was bizarre when he considered that not too long ago, the act of holding onto a glorified image of ones' brother would be laughable to him. It was only now that he realised that he never truly appreciated what he had until it was gone.

He knew that at some point, most likely soon, he would be forced to truly register the change in his brother. He would be in a situation where he would need to detain him; like a prison guard, and ship him home to Asgard to face punishment. And he knew that then, and only then, would he really see his brother as he was now, laid bare, without the glamour of his battle armour or power of his sceptre to distract from the true mutilation of his soul, which would undoubtedly be readable on his physicality. Thor wanted his head to stop. He wanted a relief from the barrage of feelings and thoughts that were dancing around in his skull, threatening to cripple him. Agitated, he thrust his head in his hands and squeezed his eyes shut as he did when he was a child, trying desperately to clear his mind, even if just for a moment. He ran his hands through his golden hair and sighed when, at last, he seemed to find himself at a fragile equilibrium, although he did not know how long it would last.

It was at that moment that he heard the door slide open, as Steve Rogers entered the room. If there was anyone out of the group who had enough compassion to realise when someone was suffering, then it was Captain America. He was prided on being a good man, after all, for why else was he the only Avenger who truly deserved the title of leader? Thor nodded in Steve's direction briefly before turning his head back, suppressing his emotions and staring expressionlessly at the blank monitor. Steve cautiously moved further into the room, knowing that he was treading on eggshells, certainly with regards to the topic he was about to bring up. He did not want to in any way impose himself by discussing something that was very personal to Thor, in a manner which was intrusive or condescending. He chose not to sit down at first, but rather kept himself at a fair distance from Thor, leaning against the far wall and crossing his arms before he finally spoke. "So the others and me, we reckon we might have a plan to stop Loki." He studied Thor's face for a response, and saw a flicker of something cross it, although he was not sure what emotion it was, for it certainly wasn't happiness.

When Thor chose not to reply, Steve could sense for sure that he was struggling to come to terms with what was really happening. What was going to have to happen. He knew the look of a man who had lost something. Who needed support. He would never cease to give it when it was needed, no matter what he might feel about the subject matter. He softened his posture, unfolding his arms and sticking them in his pockets before slowly moving just a few steps along the wall nearer to Thor. "You may have a plan, but it cannot afford to be anything less than genius. For Loki has an intellect greater than anyone I have ever known. He always has. It would take a great deal to outsmart such intelligence as his." Thor said finally, failing to keep the note of strain from his voice. Steve looked down at the ground knowingly, noting the pain in Thor's voice when he spoke of his brother. He wanted to change the subject, to discuss something less hurtful. But he knew that would do no good. He knew what it meant to grieve in silence, to be consumed by loss and have no one to turn to. He knew the only thing he wanted to discuss in such a situation. And so he made the decision to ask Thor the question he was never asked. Taking a breath, Steve swooped gently downwards to sit on the bench next to Thor, pressing his hands together almost proficiently, before finally turning to him. "Your brother… before all of this… what was he like?"


	4. Captain

Thor was jolted by the surprise of hearing Steve's question, as he turned to look at him in disbelief. He couldn't quite process what he had heard. Had he, Steve, a mortal man, just attempted to cross the borderline between colleague and confidant with a God? He knew he shared the same opinion of Loki as the others, so why should he seek to probe the significance he had upon Thor personally? To what advantage would this be for the team? For the cause? They sought to rid the world of Loki, why should he perpetrate a pretentious façade of concern for his past? Thor's doubts once again drew sword and readied for battle, as he fought to keep himself composed. He stood up abruptly in the aftermath of Steve's words, and began to pace the room in an almost methodical manner. Steve remained quiet. Finally, Thor made the decision to entertain his enquiry. It was, after all, the only trace of understanding or solace any of the Avengers had shown him since he arrived on their realm.

It was going to be difficult to form the words, to cast his mind back to the memories which haunted him, to pull them out from within himself and lay them bare for another to see. It was going to hurt him to allow himself to remember. But if truth be told, he never really forgot. The entire fabric, the entire canvas, of he and Loki's lives together, which stretched across the millennia, was seared into his brain like a brand upon his very soul. All he was about to do was finally vocalise it, to put it into an intelligible manner of communication as best he could, so that a human could perhaps hope to comprehend his predicament, even if they could never truly understand the scale of torture it caused him. The relationship he and his brother shared, the relationship that had raged through the sands of time, and which far eclipsed the fleeting existence of Steve's life by more than he could ever deem possible. Thor allowed himself a small smile as he appreciated how truly above Steve's pay grade the following conversation was likely to be, before turning to face him, surrendering to the impulses that begged him to unleash the contents of his mind. Still, Steve waited; patiently, respectfully, for Thor's readiness to speak. And when he finally did, he remained silent, offering no scathing comment or judgemental glance, but only steadiness and tranquil mediation.

"He was… mischievous in nature. To put it mildly." Thor began, sitting next to Steve once more, his feet positioned apart, so that he could rest his elbows on his knees and clasp his hands together in front of him. "He always liked to cause discord whenever he saw an ample opportunity. That much of him still remains. Except in that time, there was always an equal measure of righteousness in him, an endearing demeanour that always pacified his actions to himself and everyone around him. They were but harmless tricks then. We did not seek to punish or reprimand what was only in his nature. I do not know if you are aware, but we were once worshipped by the ancient people of your world in days of yore.." "Yes, I remember from history" Steve finally offered in reply, breaking his silence. "The Vikings worshipped you. You were their Gods." Thor gave a gentle laugh as he acknowledged Steve's response. "Yes, we were. We revealed ourselves through an undesired error to one of their settlements a thousand Earth years ago. Loki and I were but children at the time. The word spread of the wonders that the village had witnessed, as their primitive civilization, which was but at the very brink of its development, chose to adopt us as chosen deities upon which they could build the foundations of their daily lives. They saw the presentation of our powers as a way of defining the workings and structure of the world around them, which they did not yet have the means to understand. The stories they conjured of us grew, as did our significance to their people and the purpose of the mantras they had given us. We did not know it then, but the classifications they gave, which in turn became legend and myth, truly did reflect our nature and power on our own world as well as theirs."

Steve listened intently, raising a hand to stroke his chin in thought, as Thor continued with the point he sought to make. "Their beliefs merely strengthened the names we had made for ourselves. Since birth, I possessed a kinship to the powers of the sky, to the forces of the storm and wind. I was connected to them infinitely, my will was their bidding, and as I grew I earned the right to wield the hammer that truly sourced the intensity of my abilities. Henceforth, I was known as the God of Thunder." Again, Steve remained ever the obliging listener, as Thor drew breath and continued. "Likewise from birth, my brother always possessed the ability to be in command and adapt the mystical workings of magic. He has a connection with the unknown properties that create the wonders of the universe, the power to control anything and everything in his hands, from fire to ice, from matter to mind. You have no doubt seen or heard of the things he can do. There is truly no end to his talents. Except he could never contain the rebellious element of himself that was always prominent in his nature; for where he could do countless good deeds when such was called for, he was also prone to utilising his abilities for opportunities to cause chaos. He always sought entertainment to stimulate his own desires in equality to attaining the goals of the greater good. His divided nature was one which the ancient people both respected and feared. And so, his epithet became the God of Mischief." Steve lowered his hand, replacing it on his knee, chewing over Thor's words as he finished his speech. _That's a very interesting and valuable history lesson._ He thought._ But it wasn't really an answer to the question I asked_. Steve knew that it would be the height of disrespect to mention this to Thor, and so simply bowed his head courteously in the acknowledgement of reply, figuring that if Thor truly was set on telling him even just a little about his personal relationship with his brother, then he would do so soon enough.

Surely as Steve had predicted, after a short while of silence, Thor's professional outlook began to peel away. He had told Steve of their origins. Now came the time for the tale of their humanity. "He truly was not always like this, you know" he said quietly, staring at the ground in an attempt to level his emotions once more. Steve waited for the surrender to come. "He was mischievous, yes, but he was never cruel. Never ruthless, never bloodthirsty. You must understand, he always had- he still has-… a goodness in his heart. I cannot expect you to share my view, but it is what I believe to be the truth." Thor stopped to compose himself before continuing. He could not have another hero see him break. And he knew that if he told Steve of his most memorable childhood memory of Loki, there would be no precautions he could prepare himself with that could stop him from doing exactly that. So he decided to cast his mind back to the simpler, happier times they had shared, although it haunted him to do so, for when he travelled back to those days in his mind, he saw no will to return to the present.

"He was a champion hider." Thor spoke finally, fighting to keep the expression of melancholy from possessing his face. Steve shot him a puzzled look. "Hider?" "Yes, you know, the game. I believe you mortals call it 'hide-and-seek?'" "Oh yeah, we do. Wow that game sure is a classic. It's not only lasted from the 20s when I played it, but its even a kids sport on another world too. Funny." Steve replied, shaking his head in bemused appreciation. "I do not understand..." Thor began but Steve cut him off quickly before it got painful. "Its just irony that's all. Not actually laugh out loud humour. Go on!" Thor had never really grasped the mortal affiliate of sarcasm. "Well there was one time in our youth, I believe we were somewhere around nine and seven years of age in mortal years, when we decided to play said game, for we always would tire after we had been subject to one of our Fathers daily addresses to his court. We always hated how he would have us be present for such proceedings, for what use were they to children? But my Father was King, and we were his sons, and so we had a duty to learn the ways of the court from a very young age" _Boy._ Steve thought. _They say they are more advanced than we are, but this sure as hell sounds a lot like a medieval lifestyle to me._

"So as was natural, we longed for sport after such dreary times. I remember one day, Loki and I exited the throne room the way we always had, except we had an idea." Thor's face softened in the blissful happiness of the memory. "The halls of the palace had so many rooms, so many niches, so many hidden enclaves, that we could not believe that we had never thought to play a game of hide-and-seek within its walls before. We thought about playing it amongst ourselves, but that idea seemed tedious to Loki, and indeed to myself, so we rallied a solution." A faint, but resonating laugh, escaped Thor's lips as he continued. "You must be aware that my brother and I, although we were mere children, we were the sons of the King, the Princes of our realm, and our desires, and most importantly, our lives, were held with the utmost regard. And as royalty, through no beckon of our own, we found that those who had serving positions in our household strove to be… accommodating to our wishes." Thor chortled and shook his head at Steve's raised eyebrow, almost in embarrassment.

"We were young, we believed the world was ours to command, as do all children. And so we decided that we two would hide, and it should be our two servants that played the role of seeker. And as we wished it, so it was. We asked them to count to sixty, and fled down the halls, trying to find a hiding place. I was useless, I admit, I had no imagination when it came to concealing myself behind anything, but Loki… Loki was quite the opposite. He was always like a chameleon, he could blend into the background so convincingly it was like he was never there. His magic assisted him greatly in that sense. And such was when I chose to hide behind one of the great curtains of the front window, a hiding place that was so obvious now I cast my mind back, that I cannot believe I ever considered it, he had to intervene." Steve watched as Thor's eyes began to glaze over ever so slightly as he recalled the scene.

"One of our servants was close to finding me, and I knew it was only a matter of time. I cursed myself that I would be the one to be caught first. But as I prepared for the curtain to draw back, I was pulled sideways into the shadows by an unseen force. Loki. He wouldn't have me upstaging us by getting caught, so he devised a plan to hide us both. He pulled me down the hall, past where the servants were searching on the opposite side, and into a small passage that led off just before the feast hall, a passage I had never before seen. I was certain we would never be found there, as was he. Although I would never admit it then, it was an ingenious place to hide. Yet Loki was not satisfied. He grew bored after the few moments we stood in silence, as he always did. I could sense what he wanted to do, saw the mischief in his eyes, and I tried my best not to condone it. For I was the firstborn and heir; I could not afford to be seen behaving in such an unruly manner. But Loki always held the ability to sway me with one look, and so I made the choice to let him have his fun. We gripped each others arms and closed our eyes, as we had done many times before, and I sent all the intent of strength I could manage through my arms into his. And when he received it, he was able to fully envelop us both in the shroud of invisibility he usually only reserved for himself. And that was when we truly let ourselves go wild. Loki looked at me with the glint of naughtiness that was his trademark, and I returned it, as we counted to three and ran out from where we hid, sprinting down the halls until we found our perpetrators. But of course they could not see us."

Thor chuckled again, although this time with tears present in his eyes. "We ran amok, circling around them many times, Loki making faces of such hilarity behind their backs that I could barely keep myself from roaring with laughter and giving us away. No one, in all of the Nine Realms, was ever able to make me laugh like Loki did." Sensing himself begin to grow unsteady, Thor elected to stand up, in an attempt to brush away the intensity of his emotions, before pacing the room once more as he finished his story. "But of course we were always going to get caught. After we grew tired of amusing ourselves in front of the servants, who by this time were calling our names, terrified that they had lost us, we resorted to our usual toy fighting that we often did when we had nothing to do. Except as you can imagine, such a thing is rather… excelled, for Asgardians. So our fights consisted of Loki materializing himself atop one of the golden statues and I sending weakly charged bolts of lightning his way, missing each time, as you can imagine. But you see we were so young, and so we had not yet mastered our powers to a manageable degree, and so the result of our venture was Loki losing his balance and sliding down the statue, landing exactly on top of me as I ripped down the curtains in an attempt to steady myself. As was expected, the invisibility we wore dissipated as we found ourselves entangled under the sheer weight of those curtains. When we finally surfaced, we found the two servants standing over us, rage painted plain to see all over their faces. They were not amused. They scolded us and vowed to inform our father before ordering us to bed. Loki and I should have been disappointed with ourselves. We were expected to be courteous and proper in punishment. But alas, as soon as they marched from view, and our eyes met, we could contain ourselves no longer, and we erupted into such crippling bouts of laughter we never thought we would ever breathe again." Thor smiled reminiscently before looking at Steve, in an almost weary fashion. He sighed deeply, before adding; "That was what my brother was like, Captain. He was laughter, and mischief, and fun. He was the epitome of boyish elation. He was the balm of recreation that soothed a tedious life of duty and conduct. He was my confidant. My adviser. My friend." Thor stopped talking, swiftly turning away from Steve and turning his gaze upwards to stem the well of emotions that were building up within him.

* * *

Steve said nothing, only sat still as he had been doing all along, biting his lip in concern as he realised the intensity of Thor's anguish. He could not begin to comprehend what it must be like to grow alongside such a person as Thor described, only to witness them grow cold and malevolent, to see them turn into something black and ugly, and being powerless to stop it. There were no words of solace Steve could offer. He had been a vent for Thor's emotions, and in that sense, he had been useful. But he knew what had to be done. He knew Loki had to be stopped. He just hoped that this incident had helped ease the burden on Thor's mind as much as was possible. He rose to his feet, sensing Thor's discomfort at having had revealed a glimpse into a far more vulnerable side of himself. He knew when to leave well enough alone. But he could not leave this conversation without offering some words of comfort to the God before him. And so as he moved to the door to take his leave, he briefly placed a hand on Thor's shoulder, ignoring the all of his instincts that told him such an act was inappropriate.

"I'm not going to lecture you about good and evil, about doing the right thing and not doing the right thing, because you seem to be a man of morals, I've heard that much. You don't need me to tell you what has to be done here. What we have to do. You know how this has to end." Thor shot a momentary look of unease at Steve as he continued. "What you've told me, doesn't make me forget about the things Loki has done. The things he plans to do. I'm not going to insult you by lying about that. I've got no plans to sanctify the guy, I'm sure he has his reasons for being this way, but as far as I'm concerned, he has taken one step too far. He has incited a war on my planet. That's not something I'm willing to let go. But man to man, I will say this. If you still believe, just for one second, that there might be a small chance, even the tiniest glimmer of hope, that your brother might be saved, that there might be a way to bring back the person you knew when all of this is over, then there's only piece of advice I can give." Steve rescinded his hand and opened the door before turning to Thor with his departing words. "Fight for it." And so, in the aftermath of Steve's statement, a few moments after the door had slid shut behind him, Thor began to pull himself together. He gathered his thoughts with him, picked up Mjolnir from its resting place on the floor, and strode to computer monitor, finally switching it on to face at last the intimidating figure who resided under its watch. Thor clenched his fist and let it go, exhaling deeply as he looked upon the form of his brother. He readied himself to leave. He readied himself for battle. He finally knew what he had to do.


	5. A Mother's Words

**Had to split this part because it was rather large! This is the last of the timeskips (this is after the events of the Avengers; the movie has filled in from the last chapter) So in otherwords, Loki has been captured. (Thor 2 territory) From this point on the timeline will be continuous! I also found myself writing from Thor's POV at this point too; (I dont know if its because, being an eldest sibling myself, I can put myself in his shoes more when trying to imagine his feelings, hence my tendency to ramble!) but the story is going to switch so the next chapter will be mostly Thor's POV still and then it will switch to Loki's for a bit and etc :) hope you enjoy! x**

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Thor closed his eyes wearily as he pressed his hands against the cool metal door to prevent them from trembling. In accordance, he bowed his head forward to rest upon it, remaining so motionless that the only movement he could detect where he stood was the steady beats of his heart and the controlled rhythms of his own breathing. In such a position he remained for a considerable while, quelling his anger and heartbreak as ferociously as a winter storm, until he heard the faint sound of footsteps, clipping down the great hallway towards him. Hastily, Thor broke from his abstractive state and raised his head high, putting every effort of fortitude into the handsome features of his face as he turned to face her. He summoned all of the mirth he could find it possible to summon, and exuded a fragmented smile in her direction as Frigga, his mother, swept down the hall, her beautiful golden gown billowing behind her as she closed the distance between them. "Thor!" she exclaimed radiantly, as he scooped her into a loving embrace in his arms. "My child, I cannot describe the pleasure I feel that you have returned." "I am pleased to return, Mother" replied Thor expectantly, slackening his hold on her until she only clasped his hands gently within hers. "I hear you are Midgard's saviour! I cannot begin to emit how proud we are of you. Your Father regards this with the greatest honour. You truly are a noble and deserving King of Asgard."

Frigga beamed up at her son with an expression of joy and pride, but Thor was not oblivious to the concealed sorrow that he knew lay beneath it. "Thank you, Mother, but I only did what I believed was right. You flatter me so." Thor tried his best to hide the contention he felt as he moved to pull away, but alas Frigga was too swift in recognition, keeping a firm grasp of his hands as she proclaimed; "We mean it Thor. You are a worthy son." The utterance of those words pierced Thor like an icy blade, as the echoes of the past, of the last time those words were spoken, came flowing back to him in a tidal wave of remorse. He could not bare to look at Frigga any longer, and so he prised his hands from hers, striding waveringly across to the ornate window that was situated to his right, placing his hands upon the frame and gazing out over the sparkling and evanescent towers of his home world. He felt the guilt build up inside him as he realised that he had just attained everything his brother ever wanted. The desire that had drove him mad, had turned him into something he was not. The motivation, confessed directly from the source, for all of his actions, and he, Thor, had gotten what he had so coveted without even a desire for such. He swallowed hard, moving his hand vacantly to the spot on his torso wherein Loki had sank the blade of one of his throwing knives, so soon after Thor had begun to hope that he might concede to give up on his treacherous scheme. He remembered the betrayal and desolation he had felt at that moment, and the anguish, stained with iniquity, that had possessed Loki's face as a single unwanted tear slid down his cheek, before he leapt from the tower upon which they fought to continue his quest for destruction.

_Sentiment_. The stab itself had caused him no grievous injury; indeed Loki knew that it would not, but rather it was the meaning and intent behind it that had fractured Thor's heart beyond repair. Loki's pride was too great to compromise his plot; his hunger for power too insatiable to allow himself to realise the wrongful nature of his actions and put a stop to their consequences. His anger and hatred reigned over him autonomously, and they were not willing to surrender their subject, despite any momentary doubts that he may have exhibited. Ultimately, they had put an end to Loki's treacherous plot, he and the Avengers; and were hailed as heroes on Earth. For the others, that was where the problem of Loki and their ordeal had ended. But for Thor, who had taken his bound brother back to Asgard to face retribution, it was only the beginning. So many times he had thought of disowning Loki as his brother, like Loki had done to him; of accepting the monster he had become and granting him no forgiveness, whether he had any desire for it or not. Such a state of mind may indeed have mediated his suffering, may have allowed him to finally relieve himself of the guilt and begin to function as he had before. He often wished he could switch off his emotions towards his brother, a feat that Loki had seemingly accomplished very well.

_Perhaps that is why he can execute such terrible deeds with no second thought._ Thor contemplated. _Because he no longer has love in his heart. Because he has shut off his emotions, and no longer cares. Because he cannot._ Thor turned his gaze downwards to stare at the polished wood of the windowsill. He had attempted to adapt such thought processes many times, but each time, they were unsuccessful. No matter what horrors his brother had committed, even when carried out before his very own horrified eyes, he could still not find it in his heart to hate him. It was a burden he cursed himself for being unable to lift. But the more he thought on it, the more he became glad that he possessed no such inhuman ability. For if he turned his back on his brother, if he accepted that he was a merciless monster that he had to destroy, if he allowed the connection between them to break, then he would be no better than Loki. He would be as embittered, twisted and broken as he was, and there would be no hope of light, no hope of salvation at the end of it all for either of them. He remembered when Loki had fell down the crevasse in the Asgardian woods on their childhood quest, oh so many years ago, and allowed the memory of that little boy to dance back into his mind, where he had been forbidden from for so long. He had been so brave. He had been so strong. Thor knew that it was now his turn to be the same. He recalled the promise he had made Loki then, and his resolve was hardened. He would never let any doubts pollute his mind again. He owed that little boy. He owed his brother. On the many occasions when had been told by others, or indeed by himself, that Loki was gone, he would bring forth the memory of that long ago night and the mindset he had possessed when looking for his brother in the woods. _He is not gone. He is lost. And if he is lost, then I am going to find him._ The situation they were in now was no different. He would not allow himself to forget as Loki had. The poignancy of the promise he had made him struck true in his heart now, more than ever before.

* * *

"Thor, my darling. Thor." Thor juddered back to reality as he felt the firm grip of his mothers hand on his shoulder. Slightly dazed by the intensity of the thoughts within which he had been enveloped, he shook his head sharply to clear the jadedness of his mind, before allowing Frigga to gently turn him around and look deeply into his eyes. He knew she could sense the underlying issue that burned between the two of them. His mother was not like his father. She must be as tortured as he was, he was sure of it. "I know what vexes you. For it vexes me in kind" she whispered finally, and the fragile countenance behind the fair beauty of her face began to crack. Thor sensed that she too, had realised that the time for avoidance was past. He knew it must be difficult for her to address the problems that had wreaked devastation upon their lives in recent times, for indeed, the aura of loss and shame was not yet absent from the House of Odin. He did not know when it would be. At the moment, it was hard to imagine it having been anything otherwise, a feeling that saddened Thor more than he could express. The wall of etiquette that they had remained behind since they had met, began to crumble. The time for confrontation was now.

Thor looked down at his mothers face and saw the suffering come to the surface, amalgamating itself with the brim of tears that began to form within her eyes. "I know why you wait here, Thor. I have been told of the reason why you have come each of the seven days since you returned. Why each time you wait before the door, but never enter." Frigga swallowed, struggling to maintain the regal posture that was expected of her, even in front of her own son. "I-I too have come... many times. And like you I could not find the strength to enter.." Thor continued to look at her, imploring her within his own self to convey her feelings. To say his name. "And what is it that has prevented you, Mother? For I know my reason. It is that I fear that if I enter that room and meet my brother once more-" Thor halted briefly, noticing the visible jolt in his mothers stature as he acknowledged her other son; "-I fear that it may be only hatred anew that greets me. I do not know if I can bear such again." Frigga remained still, as if she was held fast by an unknown force, her eyes still moist and her composure truly defeated, as she attempted to structure a reply. She distantly released her hands, which had been gripping Thor's arms, and allowed them to fall to her sides. Her radiant face began to grow dim with sadness as she continued to fight the emotions that she too had been keeping within herself.

Finally, she opened her mouth hesitantly to speak. "You worry rightfully, Thor. For there is no balm in existence that can remedy the wounds of the heart-" She cut off cordially, visibly fighting the urge to cry, and in that moment, Thor felt a twang of hatred pulse into his heart in his brothers name, for being the cause of their mothers suffering. He felt the familiar collision of woe and anger within him, fighting to bury it, so that his mother could be allowed to continue. "I do not enter because-" Frigga's voice cracked in her throat as she tried to form her sentence coherently without breaking down. "I do not enter because I…I am afraid also." Thor narrowed his gaze as he studied her, confused by her confession._ She has not seen the deeds Loki has committed. She has not witnessed his anger. She has not observed how he has changed._ _What has she to fear?_ And then it hit him, like a block of cold marble, as he surmised the motivation for his mothers dread._ Of course; not having bore witness to his transformation will heighten the horror in her eyes. H_e thought frantically._ She has been ignorant to his ways, knowing only the face of her child, and now she fears entering that room and being faced with a monster._Thor bowed his head sadly as he reasoned his deduction. He had wanted to spare such a sight for himself, and so was not at all surprised that his mother struggled to do the same. However, when Frigga persisted in her admission, she gave an explanation different from that which he was expecting. An explanation that was so heartbreakingly human and ordinary that it almost took the very breath from his lungs. "I-I am afraid for his health" Frigga managed finally, before a hiccup of a single sob forced its way out of her throat. Thor blinked at her incredulously, unsure of what to offer in reply. But he did not need to offer such, as Frigga's bud of emotions had begun to open.

"I-we- believed him dead for a year" she continued unsteadily, tears beginning to trickle from her eyes. "A year, Thor. We accepted that he was gone from our lives and yet he was not! He was alive. He was in such places that we never deemed imaginable- but he was alive. And he was alone. He had no family by his side, he had no one… " Frigga trailed off, as her voice grew more and more unhinged and wracked with emotion. "We sat at our table night after night, your father making play that nothing was ill, that we had not lost... The empty chair still present, even when he saw fit to remove it rather than face its memory..." Frigga raised her hand to her face and wiped the tears from her cheeks roughly, neglecting in her frenzy to use the ladylike handkerchief that was always on her possession. "We thought we could forget, but I could not. I saw his face every night in my dreams. I would cry out for him in the dark, believing I had heard his cries as I had when he was but a babe. I would run in my nightgown to his chambers and believe, just for a moment, that he was there as he had always been. I would imagine that I heard his voice, calling out to me and I would embrace him again and feel him in my arms. I would know that he was safe, and warm, and home, as he should be." Frigga's face contorted agonisingly as her body became besieged with sobs as she struggled on. "And then I would remember. And then I would see the cruel, empty room and take heed that all that I held within my arms was nothingness. That my child was gone, never to return." Thor moved forward, tears welling in his own eyes, and took her into his arms, allowing her to sob into his shoulder as she fought to say the name that had been eluding her for so long.

"I would cry out for him again, praying that somehow I could be heard." Her muffled voice was hoarse in Thor's ears, as she finally uttered his name, releasing it from within herself with such intense pain, as one would pull a barbed arrow out of flesh. "Loki" she whispered brokenly, holding Thor even tighter as the tears continued to flow from her eyes. "He was in such forsaken realms, mixing with unspeakable characters… seeing such unthinkable things. How could he ever be the same?" She spoke quietly, pulling herself gently from Thor until there was an adequate space between them. "My child; my youngest child, was experiencing such horrors of which he should never have had to bear witness, and all the while we revelled in our ignorance, believing that he was truly dead and seeking no further verification. We did not even send anyone to search for him. I am not blind to his sins, but he was a Prince of Asgard, and he was our family still. And we failed him. " She turned her gaze downwards to the floor to stem her shame, sniffing gently. "It shames me. And I am afraid of going into that chamber and seeing my son, my boy, and registering all that he has lived through in his form. It will break my heart, to see him so changed, so unhealthy. For who would have cared for his welfare this past year? Who would have cared if he wasted away, if he grew sickly and pale? No one. And that is what scares me, Thor. Seeing my child in such a state, and knowing that I did nothing to prevent it." Frigga finished dejectedly, stemming the flow of her tears with her hands once more, her reddened eyes turning upwards again to face her eldest son.

* * *

Thor returned his mothers gaze forlornly, allowing his eyes to dart for a moment from her tear-stained face to the hard metal door of the chamber within which his brother was being contained. "Worry not mother. I have looked upon Loki more recently than you have. He is in good health, I assure you. You have nothing to fear." Thor bit the inside of his lip uneasily as he soothingly pledged his reassurance. While what he had said was not entirely lies, for indeed he had not yet really looked upon Loki with no distractions around him to truly register the difference, it was not entirely based on truth either. For in reality, he simply did not know the true like of Loki's health. Although if there was one thing he did suspect, it was that it brushed nowhere near the satisfactory classification he had just given his mother. He had little time on Earth to draw any solid conclusions about his brothers physical state, as his preoccupation at the time was saving the world from his destruction, but what he could surmise from their meetings was that he was unquestionably not in a healthy state of mind. But he could never tell Frigga such, for he suspected that knowing her son had deteriorated so much mentally, in addition to whatever endurances his body may have suffered, would be too much for her to bear. Physical wounds, he knew, could be easily healed, but as for what lay beneath the surface; those injuries bore the deepest cut, and so required a greater force to be repaired.

"I know you speak false my son." Frigga replied in a small voice. "You were never able to hide what you truly felt as well as your brother. Your heart was always borne on your sleeve. And that is nothing if not an admirable quality. But in this instance, it betrays you." Thor looked back at Frigga, almost sheepishly. He could never get anything past her. "I apologize, Mother. I only saw the need to calm your mind." "I know you meant well, my son" Frigga sighed, as she moved gently past Thor to rest her hand on the metal door. She fixed the cool metal surface with such an intense stare it was almost as if she was attempting to peer through the hard divide that separated herself from her other son, so that she might see him on the other side. "One day, I pray, he will return to us. In mind and soul, not just in body." Thor moved to stand by his mother's side as she continued. "I cannot bear to think of the deeds he has committed. Or the evil that now dwells within his heart. But alas, I am not ignorant to their existence." Thor shot her a concerned glance. "He has tread far afield from his rightful path. He has been corrupted by his own fears. But I know my sons heart. There is goodness in it, too. We have all seen it. Known it. Loved it. I pray for the day it triumphs and makes itself known once more." Thor gave a small smile, taking his mothers hand gently in his and kissing it before replying. "Have faith, Mother. I have seen such conflict within him. That which he strives to hide, but cannot. He still retains a conscience. I have witnessed it. He claims to be immune to the notion of sentiment, yet it bears over him so heavily that even those who do not know him can detect its presence. The doubt; the lack of conviction in all of his actions. And it is that knowledge that keeps me fighting."

Frigga smiled, as she removed her hand from the door to caress Thor's face. "I cannot imagine how hard this must be for you, my son. But I can see the faith in your eyes; the faith that is so much more profound than that which any of us possess, even me. I can see your determination. For you have known him in more ways than anyone. You are bonded, and despite whatever wounds may exist between you; he is your brother, and you will never allow yourself to lose sight of that. It is in your strength that I find assurance, Thor. For I believe that it shall be you, and only you, that will save him from himself. When everything else falls away, it will not be the love he may have for me, or your father or any other soul that will heal him. It will be the love he has for you. " Thor felt tears prick the back of his eyes as his Mother finished, looking at him once again with eyes of pride, and hope, and concern; all swirled into a dense cocktail of emotion. He turned to face the door once more, and gripped the bar that lay across it firmly with both hands. Frigga, standing behind him, gently put her hand on his shoulder and whispered in his ear. "Remember who he is. Do not let him deceive you into thinking he is a stranger. Despite what he may say, or do, to try and convince you otherwise, do not let the faith you have disintegrate. For it is your greatest strength. You know who he truly is, even if he does not." Thor bowed his head in appreciation as he felt his Mother remove her hand, listening anxiously as she turned and took her leave, her footsteps fading away down the great hall until only silence remained once more. He exhaled deeply as he grasped the great metal bar in both hands. His heart was beating furiously, rife with fright, and nerves, and apprehension, as he attempted to steady himself before entering. He never could have imagined ever feeling such things when faced with only meeting and talking with his own brother. _It is Loki._ It was a saddening testament to how great the changes in their lives had become. Glancing briefly down at Mjolnir, which he had brought with him as always, in case it was needed, he shifted his concentration to opening the door. Forcing the bar up, Thor felt himself forget to breathe, as he finally swallowed his anxieties and heaved the door open, before stooping to pick up his hammer and stepping tentatively inside.


	6. Brothers Meeting

**The introduction of Loki. I loved writing this bit so I hope I have done justice! And I HAD to get some bby!Thor and Loki in there somehow! Just to reiterate how strong their bond was, and for the unashamed adorableness! Thanks again!x**

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The room was dimly lit and shadowy, with only the distant lights of Asgard streaming weakly in through the window; with the exception of one florescent bulb of light that came from within, and was glowing in the far corner. Basically furnished, it contained a carved wooden bench that was situated against the back wall, atopped with a cushion of the Asgardian colours, in accordance with the great curtains that hung by the floor length window behind it. In addition, there were also two mahogany chairs, matched with a medium sized table and a water bowl elegantly carved into the wall on the furthest right hand side. A few portraits, unseen for the lack of light in the room, lined the remaining walls. It used to be a frequent play room for the brothers as children. Now it was a holding cell fit for a Prince, if there ever was such a place in existence before these times. As Thor entered, pulling the door closed with a final heave, he began to squint into the gloominess of the room, straining to adjust his eyes so that he could perceive his surroundings. After a few moments, he made out the silhouette of a figure standing against the back wall, to the side of the window through which some light streamed, giving off a truly eerie image; as if he were looking upon a ghost standing next to an opening into the afterlife. Despite the fact that the room had furnishings that would have allowed him to sit down, the figure of Thor's brother remained standing, deathly still, as he had done from the moment he had been brought in.

For a good few moments, Thor stood looking at the outline in silence, the cutting tension enveloping him in the darkness. Then, suddenly, the figure spoke first; in a harsh, contemptuous tone, that was all the more menacing given that it seemed to come from nothing but a shadow. "Ah, he arrives at last. Tell me, Mighty Thor, how pitiful are you that you seek to fraternize with the damned?" Thor clenched his teeth as he moved further into the room. Exasperated of hiding behind the veil of darkness, he took a deep breath and gripped Mjolnir in his hand, before holding it upwards to draw the energy of the light towards it. The light obeyed his command, heeding his call in a flash, before being readily absorbed by Mjolnir's power. Once he had harnessed its energy, Thor struck his hammer out into the air once, and the light multiplied, spiking all over the room blindingly until everything was lit, clear and blaring. Thor blinked several times to get over the starkness of change in the ambience, after which he looked over to his brother. Loki had brought his hand up to his face and was pressing his eyes agitatedly, having evidently been subdued in darkness for a considerable period of time. The long silvery chains which bound and prevented him from using his magic, were still around his wrists and ankles, except they had been vastly extended, so that he might enjoy more freedom of movement. Thor winced slightly inside at the sight. The chains, despite being polished and gleaming, looked ugly and wrong hanging from his body. But Loki had proved to be non-negotiable and unpredictable in his actions. Thor understood that no chances could be taken, and so he bore such implementations, albeit begrudgingly.

"Tell me, why do you dwell in such dimly lit quarters? They could so easily be lit accordingly." Loki's hand paused over his eyes, as he gave out a low laugh, tinged with icy malice. "I think not of such trivial idiocies. And I find the darkness… familiar. So much more pleasurable to look at nothing than that which I detest." Thor frowned, the dull ache in his heart, that signified every beginning to his conversations with his brother, beginning to occur. Still, Loki's finger and thumb remained over his eyes, as he stood still, the colour of the gold, green and black of his tattered battle clothes, which he still wore, blending vividly and strangely with the décor of the room. As the silence remained, and he fought to formulate a reply, Thor looked over his shoulder in search of something with which he could temporarily occupy himself with. As he looked upon the wall, he felt a pang in his heart that was so violent that he had to suppress himself from clapping a hand to his chest. Upon the wall, next to the door which Thor had entered through, there was one significant portrait. There were usually portraits of the royal families in every palace of every kingdom, even on Midgard, Thor knew, but it had been so long since he had looked upon Asgard's. Gazing up at the first one, Thor pressed his fingers against his palms to restrain his emotions, just as, unbeknownst to him, his brother had done many times before him. The first portrait was named 'The Princes of Asgard' which was scrawled minutely as was tradition in the bottom right hand corner. But of course, in Asgard, where technology was so much more advanced, and yet more mystical, than Earth, a portrait was not just a painting, but a still life; almost like if a Midgardian photograph had the ability to look hand painted, despite being digitally printed. It also possessed the unique ability of being able to play back a tiny segment of the event, exactly as a Midgardian video camera would.

Smiling down at their future selves from such a device, were the infant forms of Thor and Loki, dressed identically in the royal garments of Asgard. With the regal figures of Odin and Frigga stading behind, Thor had been sat on a plush red cushion, his waft of blond hair combed back tidily behind his ears. Upon his lap was baby Loki, whose jet black hair had only just begun to grow. Being only a toddler, Thor was not much bigger than Loki, but his little arms stretched around him as much as he could, supporting his head protectively. The aching of nostalgia roared through adult Thor's soul, as he stepped forward instinctively to press the carved golden circle at the bottom of the frame that would play the snapshot of that time. Behind him, Loki looked up briefly, before recoiling, and pressing his hand over his eyes again so he would not have to watch. As Thor pressed it, the portrait began to move, only for a few moments, and Thor looked upon himself grinning down at his baby brother, who giggled and burrowed into him as his little hands ran over the little fuzz of hair that had begun to grow on his head. Behind him, Loki bowed his head strenuously, in an effort to block out the sound. Thor had barely drew breath as he continued to watch, as Little Thor pointed at himself giddily, exclaiming "Prince Thor!" before lowering his little face to kiss his baby brothers forehead in the most endearing and adorable gesture that could only be done by a child. Frigga beamed down at her little boys, before bending to Little Thor and asking; "And who is this little boy here?" In answer to this question, Little Thor held Baby Loki's head up steadier as he wiggled around, before pointing at him proudly and proclaiming; "Prince Loki! He's my baby brother!" Baby Loki giggled again one last time, before the life glimpse abruptly cut out. Thor exhaled shakily, a stab of pain entering him as he remembered what Loki had said;_ "I would rather look at nothing than that which I detest."_ He did not believe him. Loki could not just suddenly despise every pure, loving moment he had experienced in his life. He could not be so heartless. Behind him, this pain stirred deep within Loki's soul too. But his fabrications were a masquerade to his true feelings. For Loki did not neglect to look at the portrait out of revulsion; but rather he did not look at it because the pain of the lies and loss he felt was simply too painful for him to bear. He had resolved never to let Thor know this. He could never know. Finally, Thor managed to tear his eyes away from the portrait, to face the present.

* * *

Loki continued to press his fingers on his eyelids, as Thor took a few tentative paces in his direction. Loki could sense the increase in his proximity, and so he struck out a hand in front of him, snapping out in warning. "Come no further." Thor halted in obedience, his expression glazing over in dejection. He remained still, fixing Loki, who had still not looked up at him since he had entered the room, with a searching look as he waited for any kind of sign that he might give him his attention. From what he could see, the cuts that had adorned his brothers face in the aftermath of Stark Tower had almost all healed, with only a few faint lines remaining beneath his lip and along his jaw. He knew Loki would normally have healed quicker, were it not for the presence of the chains that drained him of his power. The warrior in him wanted to revel in the defeat that had been inflicted upon such a hostile force; but the brother in him was simply glad that he had suffered no grave or lasting injuries. Thor opened his mouth to speak, as he considered confronting Loki about the portrait. But, finding himself unable, he saw fit to begin on a more trivial footing, fearing that bringing up such a intimate feature of their past would only further anger Loki into silence. "I trust you have found your accommodation acceptable?" He finally said composedly, struggling to maintain an aura of calm. Loki laughed again.

"Oh how tedious you have become in your reformation, Odin's son, that you only speak of such trifling matters. I must say, I am disappointed. I had thought you would at least have some intelligible manner of inciting the discussion that you so obviously desire. But it appears you are now too spineless to seize even that." Thor gritted his teeth in restraint as he felt the all too familiar rage bubble inside him, battling against every instinct within himself to keep it down. Loki smirked darkly, before removing his hands from his face to finally look Thor in the eye. Face to face, in the starkness of this light, Thor almost retorted in shock as he noticed the extent to which his brothers features had been distorted. Loki looked, for all intents and purposes, like a shell of his former self. The pallor of his skin had faded to a pasty white, and his cheekbones and eye sockets were hollowed out, making him seem almost sickly, and tired. So tired. He did not know what Loki had been subjected to wherever he had been; but he could see the exhaustion it had etched upon his striking face, which had now been muddied by the brutal effects of negligence. His black hair had become overgrown, indeed as had his own, but it was the change in Loki's eyes that grated the most violently upon his heart. Dark circles hung beneath them, so vividly that they almost gave the appearance of bruises, and indeed, further blighted the beauty of his visage. But his eyes themselves… his eyes that had always been the colour of emeralds and had shone with a glint of mischief dancing behind them… were now darkened. There was nothing good behind them that Thor could see; nothing except the lurking threat of malice. Their colour had even been altered; his eyes were no longer a sparkling green but a glacial blue, dulled with loathing.

_How could the colour of his eyes have changed?_As he struggled to quell his emotions, Thor found himself being pestered over and over by that question, and that question alone; as if he sought to use it as a means of preventing himself from searching for the truth, for fear of living to regret it. Loki watched him struggle, his manufactured venom gathering at the tip of his tongue as he tilted his head back conceitedly before speaking again. "Move forth in your pathetic attempts of reconciliation, Mighty Thor. But know that all that you say shall fall on careless ears." Thor fixed Loki with an intense look of anger, and betrayal, and sadness; all concentrated into the silent plea that dwelled behind his eyes. He felt the words stirring in his mouth, as he attempted to select those which he thought would somehow penetrate his brothers cold exterior. He looked down at the ground in despondence, before bringing his head up to look once again at Loki's hardened face. "What happened to you, brother?" he asked quietly. It required all of Loki's willpower to suppress the instinctive wince that coursed through his body at that moment. But, alas, it could still be seen, as the features of his face contracted in abhorrence. "I am not your brother!" Loki spat poisonously, his eyes teeming with rage. "I warn you, do not call me that again. And I have no reason to divulge anything to YOU." A ripple of pain panged through Thor's body as his emotions swelled, unable to stay restricted any longer. "YOU ARE MY BROTHER!" he shouted avidly, as his voice grew more and more unstable and incensed.

"Who are you to dismiss all that binds us? Simply because you cower in the face of the truth! What gives you the right to declare our brotherhood void? Are you really so callous that you bear the nerve to attempt to so easily sever that which has existed for millennia? So that you can carry on in the twisted schemes and ambitions that have corrupted your mind without the burden of love? Does it ease your suffering, pray tell? Convincing yourself that you bear no connections to anyone; attempting to convince me that you are but a stranger, despite the years we spent growing up together, playing together, fighting together? You may have convinced yourself that you are no longer a part of this family to justify your actions, but you will _never_ convince me. You are my brother; whether you like it or not. I care of nothing else but this fact that remains. Nothing will ever change that." Loki grimaced as he seethed, the blender of his brain whisking possible replies violently until he could only pull out another scathing response. "You think yourself so wise, that you believe you can cast such idealistic judgement on my character. You have NO idea who I am. And yet now that I am no longer your mute and docile companion, supporting your every impulsive whim and indulgence, you seek to bring me back once more, so that I may live in your shade perpetually. Do not insult me by pretending that you would forgive all my deeds. I have seen the revulsion in your eyes; you would have me for a fool if you thought that I would concede to your artificial pleas. Your motives are nothing but selfish, great one. You cared nothing for my state of mind all those years, seeing only your own glory and triumphs. You have no right to lecture me on the 'sanctity' of brotherhood. And you are simply more of a fool that I thought if you believe I have any semblance of love for you. All those instances when I have sought to wreak destruction upon you, I did with the greatest of intentions. I only curse every day that I failed, and the insufferable knowledge that you still breathe. You believe me to be insane, mad, unstable in my actions. Perhaps I am. But know this; I am what you and your precious Allfather made me."

* * *

Loki's eyes had brimmed with enraged tears as he finished his outburst; raw anger glaring out from behind them. Thor looked at the enraged form of his brother, and felt a sadness and regret like no other wash over him. "You sadden me with your bitterness, Loki." He said sorrowfully. "I can see how much of you it has consumed. It spreads within you like a disease; seeking to destroy all of you that is pure. I curse myself that I let it find you. I know how betrayed you feel, by Father- but they were but words! It matters not what you have been told-" "HOW CAN IT NOT MATTER?" Loki screamed manically, feeling fire burn hot in his blood, as he took a step towards Thor, the first he had moved since he had been escorted to the chambers within which he now resided. "You do not understand; you never could hope to understand. The Mighty Thor; favourite son, favourite prince, favourite warrior; loved and admired by all, more so that I could ever be. Even our-" the breath of the words caught in Loki's throat as he corrected his mistake. "-_your_ father, who claimed to love us in equality, favoured you above all else. I was but an ersatz member of his 'family'. Nothing more than an unwanted artefact that he took for his collection. I see that now, and I finally understand. I am the product of a monster race, and so I only seek to do what is expected of me. The sooner you recognize that too, the sooner we can end this. Everything you believe we shared, the life I thought I had; was nothing but a lie. I have nothing on these realms that matters to me any longer. Only the right to power and rule, which is rightfully mine. And I will have it. I will never rest until I find a way to destroy you, and your pitiable allies once and for all-" With that, Thor lunged forward aggressively, grabbing Loki by the throat and slamming him against the wall, as he breathed heavily in pants of anger.

Gasping for air as he struggled and gripping Thor's wrist in resistance, Loki let out a spiteful cackle; silencing all of the little voices inside him that were screaming at him to stop. "And there it is! The famous rage of the Mighty Thor! It is like greeting an old friend once more. How I have missed you!." Thor felt the hopelessness begin to descend upon him as he looked at the wickedness in his brothers expression. He would never have known that Loki was so skilled at his vocation that he could twist his emotions so effortlessly from conflicted pain to merciless iniquity. For Frigga had not been wrong. There were waters that stirred deep within Loki's soul that called out to be relinquished; waters to which the unbearable suffering he had been through; the lies, the disgust, the guilt, the torture, the threats, the pain; had all been resigned. Thor, for all his attempts, could not truly see how open the wounds of Loki's heart had been; so raw they were that he had found that only by locking away all of his thoughts, all of his emotions, could he ever achieve a form of relief. Thor could never have known that, for all of his claims of hatred, what Loki really felt was the burning pain of the reality that he still cared, even though it was the last thing he wanted. He had tried, as Thor had, to hate his brother, but rather found his heart freezing in his chest when he had seen him again. He claimed to have no family or parents, to have disowned those that had taken him in and lied to him; yet whenever he had thought of his mothers face, or even his fathers, on those many nights he had spent alone, the ache of longing inside him was so great that he had to suppress himself from crying out in anguish. And for all his claims of a desire to kill Thor, he was reprimanded by the knowledge that he never could. That for every time he had tried, he had never saw it through with absolution.

He had always known, in some way, that he would survive. He could never admit that the thought of his brother; who had such faith in him still; being gone was the most agonising thought to ever plague his mind. Loki was always different from Thor, but in this respect, came their greatest distinction. Every piece of love or sentiment Loki felt, he transformed into hatred and menace, for he believed himself to have committed such sins now, for which he could never be excused. He bore more damage than any soul should ever have to see; the tragedy of his predilection ever present within him. "Why do you do this brot- Loki? Why do you seek to torture me so? I have vowed to you every recompense, every apology I can give, and I have given them to you from the bottom of my heart! Is your hatred for me so great that you cannot accept that?" The suffering becoming evident in his voice, Thor loosened his hand shakily from Loki's neck, looking at him with dewy eyes. Loki looked back, as the subjugated emotions within him fought once again to be heard.

Tell him the truth. Tell him the truth. _No._ He was the God of Lies. If there was one thing that he could not find it within himself to do, it was that. His rage had swallowed him, and his conscience could never be seen. Loki narrowed his eyes as he glared at his brother. And then, with the churning echoes of his true emotions resisting and screaming in resentment of each syllable, he whispered, his words dripping in acid; "You can never begin to imagine how much I hate you." Whatever light that had remained behind Thor's pleading eyes, died at that moment. He let go of Loki and allowed himself to stumble back, almost as if in a trance, as he felt his heart contracting and breaking in misery. Loki remained in his position, as if he were frozen, as he watched Thor suffer, neglecting to adapt the decadent smirk he had ordered himself to wear. He felt the horror and guilt swirl within him, as he registered the effect that his words had achieved, the result of one of the greatest lies he had ever told. He felt a pang in his chest as he realised how much his love meant to Thor. How deeply taking it away could destroy him. For all of Loki's beliefs that he was unloved and unwanted; here before him lay their greatest contention.

Meanwhile, Thor closed his eyes, convincing himself through his heartbreak to continue; to remember his mothers advice and pay no credence to Loki's words. At last, he fought to calm the raging storm of hurt that billowed within him, and opened his eyes. "I know not what dark plan lies within you Loki." He said finally, his voice cracking. "But I know you cannot mean that." Loki only looked at him in return, his eyes structuring themselves carefully so as not to betray his true feelings. "Never was there ever such evil in you. You never sought to bring destruction, ever. Only jest and mischief. I admired you so…" A flicker of astonishment entered Loki's guarded eyes, and left as soon as it came. "You had- you have, such strength. Such bravery, greater than that of any other man I have ever known. And I never told you how proud I was of you. Something which I regret every day." Loki found it increasingly harder to remain nonchalant, as Thor continued.

* * *

"Do you remember that night in the woods when we were children?" An unbearable silence made itself known between them as Thor awaited his brothers answer. "No." Loki's eyes darted away viciously, as he turned his back to Thor and began to stride off to the other side of the room, his chains clinking on the floor as he did so. He could no longer remain aloof, and it frustrated him. "Loki." Thor called irately, marching after him. "You do remember, and you know it to be so!" He proclaimed aggrevatedly; grasping Loki's shoulders and turning him around to face him. After he did such, he pulled on the ripped material of Loki's black sleeve, exposing his arm underneath. Seizing it in his grasp, Thor turned it to the side, where he knew the scar that his brother still bore from that night remained. And there it was, faint, due to Loki's substantial healing abilities, but present all the same. Thor looked over at him, his eyes speaking a thousand words._ He is the same person. This serves as proof._ Loki yanked his arm from Thor's grasp defensively, refusing to meet his eyes. "You remember it, and you know why I cannot stop this. Why despite all you have done, I cannot let you go. Why I love you still, and cannot accept your hatred. Look at me." Thor tilted his head outwards to catch Loki's eyes and drew them back into the centre, as he persisted to look into them desperately as he continued.

"I made you a promise, and I failed you. I neglected to see your pain, revelling in the bliss that was ignorance for so long, ceasing to address your growing envy, but rather provoking it tenfold. And then after everything you did… I realised how I had let you become this way. I allowed you to fade to black. I am your older brother, I was supposed to protect and support you, not tolerate and belittle you." Loki's hidden emotions wailed in response. Once again, what he felt on the inside, neglected to show on the outside. "When you let go… when you fell, Loki…" Thor's eyes welled at the memory. "I thought you dead. And I had never felt such pain. But it was selfish of me, for you had died believing you were unloved, hating me, and Father and everything else that was wrong with your world." Thor breathed in deeply, composing himself. "I thought I had lost you. That I would never see you again." Loki still said nothing. "Yet here you are. Everyone deserves a second chance, Loki." Thor finished passionately, his eyes begging Loki to make a response. And once again, Loki could only find contempt to greet him with. "I think you and I both know I have had more than that. I have chosen my path, Thor. Your fairytale idea of a reunion is nothing but a childish fantasy. I have changed. Committed atrocious crimes in the eyes of the realms. I am far past the point of no return. Do not insult me by suggesting otherwise."

Thor shook his head in defiance, placing both his hands affectionately on Loki's neck in the way he always did, as if hoping that somehow, the familiarity of the gesture would reignite the part of him which was lost. Loki flinched at his touch, as if someone had held a searing hot poker to his skin. Despite this, Thor retained his hold, speaking to Loki once again with hope in his eyes. "It is never too late. You have it within you to ensure that all that was used for destruction and vengeance may now be used to make amends. Look inside yourself, brother. You are so much more than that which you have become." Loki pulled away, distancing himself from Thor as the damaged pieces of his soul battled within him. He knew what awaited him. He knew they would come for him. Nothing Thor said or did could change that. He was a monster, a madman, a villain, a murderer and a heartless fiend. He would face up to his failure with dignity. "No" he breathed coldly, except this time there was a hint of doubt in his voice that even Thor could recognise. "What do you fear, Loki? Despite what you believe, you have a home, a family that loves you, and wants nothing more than your return. Why do you insist on such darkness?" Loki glanced over at Thor, regret building up behind his eyes. "Because I chose it." He replied coolly, defying, once again, everything he secretly desired. "I would advise that the Allfather let me leave this cursed place. For there is a far greater punishment awaiting me out there than any he could hope to concoct in Asgard." Thor's gaze snapped to Loki intently, concern radiating in his voice when he spoke.

"What do you mean by that?" Thor's eyes widened as he realised. "Of course… the Chitauri… Who did you bargain with Loki?" Thor pressed frantically. "To whose wrath are you now subjected?" Loki only fixed him with a half-amused smile, as the door began to open. Someone had decided that Thor's time was up. "LOKI!" Thor shouted loudly, grabbing him by the shoulders and shaking him slightly in effort to extract a reply. Loki smiled sketchily, and sighed in resignment, before finally replying. "Thanos." He muttered irately. "It is Thanos that I failed, and Thanos who now bays for my blood." Thor held still, his face morphing into an expression of horror and distress. "No, Loki… how could you have been so foolish?" The door finally heaved open, as one of the palace guards stood at the door, looking upon the intense sight of the two Princes of Asgard, the righteous and the fallen, in such a tense exchange. "The Allfather sends for you." The guard drawled blankly, gesturing for Thor to exit. Loki smirked at Thor, resuming his hostile and loathing evocation. Thor backed away in retreat, his eyes still on his brother as he moved to leave. "He will not get to you." He said firmly to Loki as he reached the door. "We will not let him. I will ensure it." And, with that, Thor walked through without another backward glance, and the door was heaved back into position behind him, leaving Loki alone once more. Loki maintained his malevolent smirk for a few more moments, before letting his face fall and exhaling deeply, feeling the sudden urge to somehow wipe himself clean of the emotional atmosphere that now seemed to be choking him. He glanced up at the wall, his eyes meeting with the family portrait that hung there still. His fingers clenched in his palms. And then, able to look upon it no longer, he raised his right hand and snapped his fingers, exterminating all of the artificial light in the room until darkness surrounded him once more. The chains did not restrain all of his magical talents, it seemed.


	7. Loki's Choice

**Its been a couple of days but I've finally gotten to put this next section up! Taking your reviews into account, and I'm going to try and split it up into a few chapters (the document on my laptop for this single section is 9 pages) I wasnt sure before, being new to the site, if there was a chapter limit or anything on the story because ive written ****_quite _****a lot! Hence the meaty paragraph explosions! But I hope that as I get used to it, I can find a way of putting the chapters on that makes it easier to read :) as I said before, I tend to be a rambler when I get into it so this fic may have a lot of chapters! :L**

**(oh also, as a note for this section; I decided, since now the story has shifted to Loki's POV, to view the events from Thor 2 as he would see them; being in a 'backseat' role, so I havent delved into or created a plot of that movie, but rather kept with Loki and his ongoing Thanos subplot (which will no doubt be in the Thor 2 movie anyway) so what he observes at the start of this chapter are the events of Thor 2, but happening in the background for him) thank you so much for the nice comments and I will get the next bit up when I can! :) x**

* * *

Loki could hear the rumbling echoes of the combat within which his brother, his fellow Asgardians and his beloved Midgardian friends were engaged in, even from a great distance. The battle cries and clashes of metal and wood pulsated through the air, reverberating so noisily that all of Asgard was alerted to their threat. Panic had set in upon the realm once more, as Thor's tenacious enemy had begun his assault with brutal dexterity. He did not have the assistance of the Avengers, but Loki, from within his garlanded prison, knew intuitively that his brother still put up a vivacious fight without them.

He had been kept in containment for longer than was expected; indeed, if all had flowed accordingly, Loki would have already answered for his crimes to the Allfather's court, and would now be serving the sentence. But, an unforeseen sequence of events that threatened Asgard's security had forced such proceedings to be put on hold. Loki was securely captured; there were larger, more imminent threats to the realm than he, which needed to be dealt with primarily. Curiously, despite all the apparent destruction outside that sought to annihilate and pillage the royal house, Loki remained isolated from any such occurrences.

It was almost as if he were shielded from what was happening outside, from the threat with which his brother fought desperately, sealed off inside the bubble of isolation that his holding cell had provided him with. He had elected to sit down eventually, after he was informed that he should expect to remain in his quarters for an indefinite period of time. Flippant of his resolve, he had resigned to lower himself dazedly onto the soft opulence of the cushioned window bench, his eyelids growing heavy with the gritty lace of fatigue. The exhaustion that he had inflicted upon himself by agreeing to tie a part of his life force to Thanos and the power he had bequeathed him, would often confront him in the most indiscriminate of intervals. The icy blue haze of power that had enveloped him as it boasted of its ability, modifying even the shade of his eyes to its own as it showed him worlds and possibilities he had never before known.

He could never predict when an onslaught of its side effects was about to strike him, but when it did, he felt as if his very soul was being drained away, his powers fading more and more until he felt dizzy and weak. As this particular draining came upon him, he felt his vigour trickling out of him faster than it ever had before, berating him so heavily that he keeled forward from the shock, putting out his hands before him to grip the sides of the bench as the entire upper half of his body lolled forward.

He squeezed his eyes shut as he listened to his own ragged breathing in his ears, trying desperately to ignore his predicament until it was over. The barrages of these episodes were relentless, and although they always ceased after a short period of time, they were consistent in preventing the features of his face from retaining their attractive radiance, keeping them blighted and sunken. As a few strands of his ebony hair fell downwards onto his face, the sound of the battle below penetrated his earlobes, pushing itself further and further into his brain. He pressed his head downwards against the fabric of the cushion, keeping his eyes closed as his mind unconsciously drifted to thoughts of his brother.

Thor had strove to plead Loki's case, before the attack on Asgard, that much he knew. He sought for him no extreme punishment, to the distain of his friends and people, seeking from the Allfather only compassion to remedy Loki's unhinged state of mind. But, alas, from what Loki could gather, the Allfather was not fully cooperative. What exactly occurred he did not know, and probably never would, for it was shortly after that the siege upon Asgard had begun, and such grievances were stalled. Thor, conscious of the warrant on Loki's head, had positioned additional guards at his door, to the murmurs of disapproval from his friends Lady Sif and the Warriors Three, who Loki knew would have no qualms about serving his head to Thanos on a platter if it were up to them.

Thor had not visited since their last meeting. Loki had scoffed when he realised the time that had passed; divided as ever; with part of himself basking in relief, while the other lamented in the dread that he may finally have been forgotten. Loki sighed in agitation, pulling himself up again groggily, as he darned upon his thoughts the cloak of reticence that he deemed necessary to quell the rebellious cries that stirred within his mind. As he strived for focus, he fixed his gaze upon the silvery chains that still controlled him, prohibiting him from using his abilities. He had discovered that his magic refused to be wholly reprimanded by such flimsy restraints, finding that he could perform trivial conjurements if he truly asserted himself, such as controlling the light in the room and manipulating the water from the washbowl.

Alas, these trivial spells alone had not nearly the power to break him out of his confinements, not even when applied in conjunction with the extreme intelligence of his cunning mind. Despite this, Loki continued to use them when he could, if only to remind himself that he was still able. However, each time he generated his magic, even at such a low level, the chains would resist, heating up to insufferable temperatures around his wrists. It was for this reason, that when Loki lifted both hands to run them down his face, which glistened with sweat, he cringed slightly in discomfort. For the skin around the ring of his wrists had transmogrified into an unsightly reddish-brown colour where his shackles had rested; the flawless flesh cauterized gaudily into scabbed crescents that clung repugnantly to the bone beneath.

He had not the stamina to heal them; barely maintaining it before the exhaustion struck, and certainly not possessing the ability to do so now. He dropped his hands to his lap with another wince as he stood up, finding his strength finally returning to him, as he moved slowly to the window. Below, he could hear the manic screams and shouts of the warriors, who battled against a force which he could not see. He squinted out into the smoky haze of the night, before witnessing the sudden flash of his brothers hammer hurtle through the sky, plummeting into whatever target it had aimed for in the distance. A forceful explosion occurred subsequently, sending a blinding plume of florescent light beaming upwards into the sky, as Loki watched with impressed eyes. But he could not relish the sight for long, feeling a prickling sensation of dread creep upon him, as he abruptly sensed the presence of another in the room.

* * *

Still, Loki remained facing the window, outside of which his brother was no doubt celebrating his victory. He did not turn around to face the familiar figure that he knew stood behind him. He did not dare check his guess. _How could he materialize here? Asgard is defended against such practices._ He thought frantically, his mind clouding over with a mixture of panic, and strangely, excitement. "Your brother is fearless in battle, Asgardian, but his exploits are not as crafted as he believes." The hoarse and intimidating growl of Thanos' gravvely voice reached Loki's ears in an unwanted melody of menace.

Loki clenched his fists tightly as the cogs of his mind worked desperately to deduce how Thanos had slipped past Asgard's defences. "In answer to your juvenile wonderings" drawled the voice behind him "Asgard is unwise to neglect its barriers in aid of besting but one foe. It simply forges a path for forces like me to gain entry from the shadows." Loki's mouth flinched into a silent grimace, as he understood how simple it was for his bargainer to enter; cursing Thor's ignorance and stupidity. It deeply disturbed him that Thanos could seemingly penetrate his thoughts, as he evidently answered that which was on his mind, not his lips. This notion terrified Loki beyond all reason. Bracing his features into a slick, calculating mask, he turned around in a grand flourish, evoking all the cunning he could from his eyes as the remainder of his strength returned to him.

"That oaf is not my brother. Asgard stands punctured by his idiocy, and that of the Allfather" he protracted defiantly. The cracked lips of Thanos' mulberry hued face curved into a dangerous sneer as he replied. "Your objections are great, trickster, but you doth protest too much." He took a broad stride in Loki's direction, closing the distance between them as he brought his head down to his level, his decadent eyes engrained with pure glee. Loki held his breath as he suppressed his fear, looking up as cockily as he could into Thanos' large face. He could not stop the part of him inside that hoped that Thor was nearby, as he violently grappled to force it far afield; terrified of revealing such a weakness to his perpetrator.

"I trust you did not forget our bargain. You promised me the Tesseract if I supplied you with forces for you to utilise in your conquest of Midgard, and you failed to deliver your end. The Other did inform you of your fate should this humiliation occur?" Fear gathered behind Loki's eyes, despite his attempts to fight it, as he answered. "Yes." _You think you know pain? We will make you long for something as sweet as pain. _Thanos grinned evilly as he stepped back, taking in Loki's stature. "Oh how wretched you are, dark prince, that you thought yourself worthy of playing with the forces of darkness such as I, far beyond your standing. You are nothing more than an infant at play; believing yourself to be worthy of such power that you obviously cannot maintain. The stench of petty emotion exalts from you like a plague. You are crippled by your pathetic grievances."

Loki gritted his teeth, fighting to remain calm, but saying nothing, as Thanos continued. "And yet… you have so much potential" Loki raised his eyes in disbelief. "I could easily take you now and subject you to the tortures which you were promised, and deserve. But you were a Prince of Asgard. Living kith and kin to the Allfather, and all that he possessed; truly immersed in the secrets of his house. Your knowledge is valuable. Your only hindrance is the dubiety that you fail to hide." Loki inhaled sharply, his mind whirring over Thanos' words. "And what would you recommend to remediate that?"

Thanos moved closer again, his words drenched in frosty calamity. "I can remove it from you. Bury it so deep within your subconscious that such degrading slights can never impair your judgement again. I can wipe away the pain and suffering of the sentiment you bear, and allow you to reach your full potential. I can ensure that you become greater than that which you could ever hope to be, with more power than you could ever have dreamed. If you concede, and if you assist me in this quest for greatness, those in your 'family' that you so despise will quake at your voice. They will kneel at your feet. You will watch them burn, and feel nothing but delight. I can promise you that." Loki stared, his whole body turning rigid, his eyes widening in both temptation and uneasiness.

"You shall finally be free of them. What say you?" Loki turned his gaze to the floor, every nerve in his body tingling on end as he contemplated Thanos' offer, which somehow seemed intimidating, and so wrong, despite being everything that he thought he wanted. He thought of how easy it would be to liberated from the suffocating ties which bound him to this family that he longed to hate. To be able to fight Thor and his precious Avengers with his full power; with no nagging emotions pulling at the back of his mind. He would be able to look at his brother and not feel his heart cracking with the agony of love, and hate, and rage, and regret. He would feel no more grief, and he would be more respected and feared than he could ever have hoped to be all his life.

Yet something in him screamed in resistance, pleading with him to resist; to realise that all of these things were what made him who he was. That they were a part of him, as were the people he loved, and if he allowed them to be taken away, he would never hope to feel the joy of seeing them again. His brother… who had such faith in him, who believed he could best his demons… He would no longer associate him with anything other than a walking target. _Was that truly what he wanted?_ Loki swallowed, the destructive forces of his mind thrashing so violently that he felt like his head was going to explode. He could take it no longer. A frantic voice suddenly bellowed from behind the door, breaking Loki from his revelry.

Thor had evidently discovered the presence of a foreign entity in the palace, and had hazarded a guess at who it might be. He had began throwing himself against the metal barrier manically, after finding the bar to be welded shut. Thanos was nothing if not prepared. "LOKI!" he shrieked hysterically, slamming both his fist and Mjolnir on the door with all his strength and power. The door still did not budge. "Worry not, golden prince" Thanos called zealously, menace glinting behind his dead eyes as he looked only at Loki.

"I have come for my prize. The brother of Thor shall not be harmed. I only seek for him to be improved. All of those troublesome creases wiped away so that he can flourish under my guidance. But the choice shall rest in his hands." Behind the door, Thor's eyes widened in horror, paying no attention to any of the warriors beside him, as he desperately attacked the door again, until his knuckles began to draw blood. "LOKI! Do not listen to him! Do not let him deceive you!" Loki continued to look down under the beam of Thanos' gaze, as he felt his brothers words scrape their way excruciatingly into his conflicted heart like blunt knives.

"Please" Thor called brokenly, holding himself against the door in pleading. "Do not let him take away everything that makes you who you are. You cannot..…" Thor's voice cracked as he resumed his barrage of attacks upon the metal door. Loki's heart throbbed in confliction as the sound pulsated through his ears; the light and dark aspects of himself clashing in a torturous battle for dominance. Finally, he could take it no longer. He longed for a relief from the pain. He did not want to feel it again. And so, with glistening eyes, Loki looked up at Thanos, the wretchedness within him protruding uncontrollably from behind his confirmed exterior. And, closing his eyes in despair, he allowed himself to slowly nod his head.


	8. Given Up

**Realized that the next part of this section was actually quite short so I figured I may aswell post it before I head to bed! I was moving into tricky territory when I decided to add in this little plot point, but I think I've ironed out any issues I initially had with it in the next couple of chapters to come :) x**

Thanos' mouth curled into a malicious smile as he reached out his two hands, placing them on either side of Loki's head. Thor's voice still shouted. _"LOKI! LOKI!"_Thanos smirked as he worked his sorcery to inter Loki's emotions deep within the recesses of his brain. Loki felt a surge of pain, as every single moment of despair he had ever experienced in his life came searing to the front of his mind, replaying before his blinded eyes. He wanted to cry out, to scream, but he could make no sound. His throat was as dry as parchment, devoid of any words. He only grasped onto Thanos' arms in counteraction, struggling to stay on his feet as his very thoughts, memories and feelings were plucked from his brain like roses from a garden; before being trampled and buried within the depths of his own contempt and anger.

Thanos laughed throatily, as he decided to truly enjoy the extent of his work before it was finished. With a sickening smirk of decadent glee, he lifted the barricade he had placed on the door with a flick of his head, causing Thor, who had continued to push and attack it, to come crashing through to the other side, hurtling forward and landing with a crash on the floor before him. Seeing the remaining warriors attempting to follow, Thanos flicked his head once more, creating a flickering force field in their path which blocked their entrance. Thor pulled himself up onto all fours, shaking off the metallic dust and grit that clung to his battered body.

He looked up just in time to see Thanos relinquish his grip on his brother with a brutal spark, causing him to stagger backwards, his mind emptied. Loki fought for concentration as the room spun, nothing but numbness coursing through his mind. He felt nothing, but it did not shock him, for indeed, he could not remember anything different. Thanos clapped a hand on his shoulder, shimmying in twisted delight as he awaited the fruits of his labour. Loki's eyes came into focus, not seeing Thor, as he looked across at Thanos, who smirked at him malevolently before cutting the chains that bound him in a swift slash of his arms. As soon as they fell away, Loki's scars, on his wrists, and the ones remaining on his face, began to heal almost instantly, as his magic coursed back through him again. Yet his face retained the remnants of his past experiences still.

"How do you feel?" Thanos enquired craftily. Loki rubbed his wrists with his hands and shook out his shoulders, as if stretching after a long nap. "I feel… enraptured" he proclaimed gloriously, the evil grin that he had worn before, returning to his expression, but this time with no conscience to belittle it. Still on the floor, Thor stared at his brother through moistened eyes, as Thanos fixed him with a triumphant sneer. He felt all of the blood drain from his face as he looked up at Loki, his whole world seeming to disintegrate around him. _No..._He thought helplessly, as he shifted his arms, his heart sagging in his chest so heavily that he thought it might break through the skin and fall to the floor. Alerted by the movement, Loki looked down at him mechanically, affixing him with a bored glare.

Thor looked back desperately, his tiny fragment of hope sinking as he saw the expression on his face. Even after Loki had lost his mind, even after he had gone over the edge, threatening and killing people who stood in the way of his quest for power, Thor had always seen the intensity of the emotion behind his eyes. Whether it was sentiment, as it had started out between them, or the frustration it grew to be, even the hatred he finally evoked at their last meeting; when faced with his brother, Loki always possessed emotions more vivid than any other soul he knew. But now, as Thor looked upon him, he was met with only indifference; a careless attitude that was so against everything Loki had ever been. His stomach churned as he realised that even the clarity of Loki's hatred had proven how much he still felt.

Now, Loki did not give him even that. He was literally nothing. Thor was not deserving of anything as passionate as hatred now. Thanos had seen to that. But then, he realised with a jolt, it was his brothers decision to make. His brother would rather forget everything and look upon him with nothing but listlessness than live with the pain of the wounds of loathing and sentiment that existed between them. He had truly given up. Loki raised an eyebrow as he turned to Thanos. "The God of Thunder I presume?" Thanos had kindly left the technical facts in Loki's brain while extraditing the others. After all, they were of great value.

"Indeed" Thanos said wickedly, shooting Thor a knowing glance. "Then why have we not yet disposed of him?" Loki asked, a swirl of effervescent light circling his wrists as he prepared to strike. Thanos reached out, grabbing his hand to stop him as Thor bit on his cheeks to stop himself from crying out. "Not yet, Trickster" he said soothingly, his words as slimy as silk. "All good things to those who wait. Come." Loki tilted his head to the side in agitation as he grudgingly retracted his magic, stepping backwards in line with Thanos, as they both summoned their powers to begin dematerializing. Thor continued to watch with hollow eyes as the image of his brother, who was now emptied, like a pearl that had been taken from an oyster, began to disappear.

Just before the room before him melted away, Loki felt a strange, dull presence within him, as if he knew the figure on the floor more intimately than he realised. But that was impossible; and so he simply shook his head dismissively, causing the occurrence to vanish as quickly as it had came, before he was gone from view. Thor remained still, his every muscle frozen in the unsteady grip of the grief that he felt. The force field evaporated along with Loki and Thanos, allowing the Asgardian warriors into the room, as they proceeded to ransack everything in search of Loki's whereabouts. Thor's voice trembled in his throat as silent tears began to stream from his eyes. He could not even think of the immense threat he was going to have to face at this moment. He could only think of his loss.

"There is no point" he croaked weakly at the others, who were still searching the room in vain. "My brother is gone." Thor let his arms give way, as he slumped forward, his head falling downwards to press against the hard floor below him, bringing his arms around it to shield himself from the poignancy of his sorrow. "He is gone" he repeated again hopelessly, before letting himself break down in a frustrated scream, as his fellow fighters strived pointlessly to console him. Thanos could not have constructed a greater plan for domination of the realms if he had searched for millennia. All he had to do was disable the heart of one of their greatest champions, and with it, his motivation to fight. And oh how he had succeeded.


	9. Six Months Later

**The Avengers are back! (this is also when I began to slip my little Stony background hints in there! :3) once again, thankyou so much for reading!x**

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"How's he doing?" Steve asked with concern, as he dropped into the seat opposite Tony in exhaustion. Tony fidgeted with the metal shards he held in his hand, before turning to look at Steve gravely. "As good as you can expect from a guy that's been torn apart piece by piece. And I'm not talking in literal terms here." Steve lowered his eyes in agreement, staring at his dirt covered hands, which were still stained with specks of blood from their recent battle. Ever since Thor had finally returned to assist them on Earth, all of the Avengers could sense that there was something missing.

It had been many months since they had heard from the Asgardian. However, when Thor did finally return before the most recent attack on their planet, it was with a newly formed countenance. He was virtually silent, only speaking when he was directly spoken to, and even then his retorts were always short and professional. The grand vigour that was always present in his posture and in his expression, seemed to have fizzled out, in exchange for reserved retaliations, that were only executed when he was provoked. It had been so strange for them to see Thor behave in this new manner, for they had been so used to his majestic mannerisms, and emotional temper, certainly when it came to his brother.

Indeed, it was no surprise that they assumed Loki was the reason for Thor's changed attitude, but even they had to admit that whatever had happened must have been unimaginable for the Thunder God to have caused him to act like this. Although they did not understand it, they had always accepted Thor's protectiveness when it came to his younger sibling, and knew that he was the true reason why he fought alongside them. So in the recent attack, when they saw a clearly freed Loki standing by a newest army of alien foes, they could only hazard a guess at what had happened, or had failed to happen, on Thor's home realm. They had saw the pain in Thor's eyes at that moment, as they had seen many times before, but this time, the pain was even more deeply profound than it had ever been.

What would have happened if the brothers had met, they did not know, for they had watched as Loki appeared to receive a message from an unseen recipient, after which he vanished in a swirl of smoke, leaving the remainder of the fighting to his cohorts. After a reasonably challenging fight, the Avengers had finally triumphed, leaving the defeated to be disposed of by SHIELD's clean up team. Thor had been badly beaten in the fight, even with his superior strength, but had begun to heal almost instantly in the aftermath, a feat that the rest of the team secretly envied. The Avengers had returned to their headquarters soon after, where Thor had marched off solemnly without saying a word, no doubt locking himself in one of the many rooms of Tony's mansion.

Only Steve and Tony had remained at the table in the meeting room, after Clint, Natasha and Bruce followed Thor's example soon after, leaving the mansion for their own devices. Tony finally sighed, breaking the silence between himself and Steve that was threatening to become awkward. "I don't get why the guy puts himself through it" he said in an almost irritated fashion. "Loki is a psychopath. Plain and simple. Its written all over him. He's tried to kill us all, including Thor. Not to mention the whole 'destroy-your-planet-and-make-you-kneel' gig. If Thor had any kind of rational sense, he'd be bumping that kid off as soon as he got the chance." Steve gave a small smile. Tony never could understand why a person would still love someone who had betrayed them. His morals were strong on that subject at least.

Once someone, no matter how close they were to him, decided to bring down Tony Stark, there were no second chances. Steve looked over at him and caught his eye, as Tony continued to turn the pieces of metal that had broken off his armour over and over in his hands. "Its easier for you to say that, Stark" Steve replied finally. "But the truth is, the whole Thor/Loki situation is something that is WAY out of our hands. Trust me, I've only seen a piece of it and it was like something right out of a Shakespearean tragedy. Wouldn't surprise me if they inspired him." Steve allowed himself to chuckle quietly at his attempt at humour. "Cause you know, they were around back then and…" He trailed off, registering the unamused raise of Tony's right eyebrow that told him that his effort to be funny was not something he appreciated.

Steve cleared his throat quickly and moved on, feeling the blush running to his cheeks. "What I'm saying is, we know that Thor loves Loki regardless. We might not get it, but its something we've all had to accept. We need to cut the guy some slack once in a while. I mean, he might be a God, but he's reacting pretty much the same way we would if we were to grow up with a sibling and have to watch them go Darth on everyone that loves them.." Tony shot Steve a confused glance. "Darth? How the hell do you know what that means?" Steve managed a proud smile as he replied; "I watched the Star Wars movies a few weeks ago. Figured I'd get more of your references that way."

Tony looked back in astonishment, feeling slightly touched that someone had went out of their way to make sure they could understand him and his stupid pop culture jokes. Everyone else just grinned and bore them. "Well.." Tony replied hastily. "I get that theres a LOT of unsolved business there, but what I don't get is why Thor has went all Terminator on our asses. Last time I checked, he already knew Loki was a manipulative little shit. So why the extreme reaction now? There's something else here that we're not in on." Steve looked behind Tony's shoulder with widened eyes in reply, as Tony, seeing his hesitant reaction, turned around in his seat to see Thor standing behind him.

* * *

Steve cringed inside at the bad timing. Thor just fixed Tony with an intense glare until he finally spoke. "You wish to know what transpired between my brother and I? Why I am the way I am? You need only have asked, metal man." Tony smacked his lips petulantly, before replying. "Its Stark, Thor, come on. And yeah, as a matter of fact that would be helpful, seeing as your commitment to this team lately has been a little stale to say the least." Thor gritted his teeth in annoyance, taking a few strides to stand in front of the table where Tony and Steve sat. "My brother has been consumed by darkness. What used to exist between us, exists no longer." Tony folded his arms, almost insulted to have been told something he clearly already knew.

"Yeah we kinda knew that already big fella. What with the killing and the destroying and the general bat shit crazy moves he started pulling on our world this time last year." Thor glared at Tony resentfully. "No. Despite what I may have believed at the time, he was still my brother then. Apprehension still lingered in him." Tony looked at Steve, unconvinced, but said nothing. "But now… now he is something else entirely. He was always ruled by his emotions but this time…" Thor trailed off, grinding down the sadness in his voice. Steve and Tony looked at each other again as they sensed Thor's reluctance to continue, before Steve spoke. "So what happened to change things?" Still, Thor said nothing. Tony's patience grew more and more thin. He was in no mood for idle hesitations. "What happened Thor?!" He quizzed vehemently, hearing his own insensitivity in his ears. "HE GAVE UP!" Thor finally bellowed back, failing to keep his rage under control.

"You really seek to know my pain Stark? My brother was confronted by a lost adversary of infamy in the realms- Thanos - in his containment, as I defended our kingdom. Thanos made him a proposition. Assist him, and he would 'take away his suffering.' Remove his curse of feeling. And Loki took it. " Steve and Tony looked at Thor with shocked expressions as Thor shook visibly with the emotional turmoil of his tale. It was Steve who finally spoke up, as calm and collected as he could. "And what does that _mean_?" Thor shot him a fractious glance. "It means that the part of Loki that was my brother has gone. It means that he no longer has a motivation for his actions. It means he will be far more ruthless, and unfeeling. It means that he does not know me, nor remember any of the life we shared. It means that his strength in force towards us will be unbridled without his conflictions to suppress him. It means that I have to look at him with the knowledge of everything we have been through, and know that he chose to wipe it all away. It means the destruction of us all."

Tony and Steve remained still in their seats, utterly speechless. Thor turned away, resting his hands on the wall as he leaned against it, controlling his breathing with a methodical cadence. After a few moments, Tony and Steve stood up, as Tony proclaimed; "Then we need to be ready. We need to fight back. Harder." Thor turned around to look at Tony, unable to believe his dismissal of his anguish. Tony understood the question behind Thor's eyes and so continued; "I'm sorry this happened. It must be unimaginable for you. But you've got to think about the other people you love now. If this guy is as bad news as you say he is and hes got a robot Loki to help him, then chances are your world, and by proxy, Earth, are in danger. The planets you swore to protect."

Thor took a step toward Tony before replying angrily; "I know this Stark, do not attempt to question my motives with regards to Midgard. It is under my protection as it will always be. You sought to understand why I have adapted the countenance I have. I told you." Steve advanced quickly across to Tony's side, in preparation for any discord that might result from their current conversation. "Then if what you say is true, you should think a little less about your brother, who is now in cahoots with the biggest enemy we've ever faced, and more about this team and the innocent people who are in danger." Thor braced his shoulders ominously. "You think me a fool for maintaining my connection to my brother" he said sternly. Tony dropped the pieces of metal that were still in his hands back onto the table.

"Of course you are. Guys like him, they never change. You come across all mighty and powerful but you don't even have the stomach to give real justice to the planet he has tried to burn to the ground. I don't get it." Tony finished defiantly, holding Thor's gaze with an ample determination. Thor clenched his fists before turning away again, slowly pacing around the small space of floor before them. "I cannot expect you to understand" he said quietly. "It is impossible for you to understand. Humans, your lives are so fleeting, so brief that the bonds you develop, deep through they may be, are always temporary. They will always come to an end with the passing of death." Tony and Steve watched Thor in disturbance as he continued. "On Asgard, it is different. Our lives are long, so much longer than you can comprehend. Immortal, as you may say. We are born, and we live, bonded with the same people we have always known. My brother and I were raised in this cycle. We were never meant to be parted like this, it was never meant to be. It never should have been."

Thor inhaled deeply. "We were raised together from infancy. We knew each other better than any other. By the time Loki and I reached adolescence, we had already lived through countless of your generations. As we grew, we watched and witnessed the rise and fall of the civilisations of your history, never able to interfere. But always watching. We stood together when Rome fell, when the Dark Ages dawned, when pompous kings in lacy frills hacked off heads when they so chose, when revolutions rose up against royalty, when royalty rose up against religion, when ships set sail for a new world, when horse pulled carriages melted away into steam engines, when the world waged war once, and then again, when dictatorships and nations rose and were brought to their knees. We lived through it all. Side by side." Thor looked over at Steve and Tony's flabbergasted faces. "When you have lived with someone as long as I have lived with my brother, then you will understand such a bond. You will understand my anguish."

For once, Tony could think of nothing to say. Thor offered him a sad smile in realisation of the impact his words had had on the two mortals, before the voice of JARVIS interrupted the silence, buzzing over the intercom to Tony. "Sir, there is a visitor at the front entrance." Tony, Thor and Steve all looked at each other in anxiety, as Tony commanded; "Give me a visual JARVIS." On Tony's order, a sleek plasma screen descended in front of Thor, Tony and Steve as the camera feed switched on, showing the image of a tall, dark Asgardian waiting at the door as if he were attending a tea party that he had been invited to. Thor recoiled as JARVIS proclaimed; "ID confirmed. The God of Mischief sir." Tony stepped back, looking at the solemn forms of Thor and Steve as he spoke. "Well. Speak of the devil, and he shall appear."


	10. Testing The Water

**Thankyou so much for the reviews! It really gives me more confidence in my writing! I'm at Uni now so I will no doubt have a LOT of work to write up in the coming weeks, but I will try and post as regularly as I can! It should be ok because I have already wrote out the next few sections of this; just a case of formatting it and proof reading before I post! So it shouldnt be too bad, will try my best to keep it coming :) thanks again!x**

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"You are not letting him in" said Steve uneasily, addressing Tony with concerned eyes. Tony glanced at the computer screen, where the image of Loki, who he noticed carried a new sceptre in his right hand, still loitered, looking around in amusement. Tony turned his attention back to Steve as he replied. "The guy doesn't intimidate me Cap. Its been a while since our last conversation, and that was such a loving, fun filled experience for me, I'd be crazy to turn down the chance of another one." "Sarcasm is really the last thing we need right now" said Steve irately. "There's something not right about this. All evidence on the table, Loki is not the kinda guy that would just knock. I don't trust it." Tony raised an eyebrow, as the image of Loki on the screen turned his gaze directly to the camera, a smirk of bemusement on his face.

"Maybe you're right" replied Tony smoothly "But that doesn't mean I'm gonna listen. I wanna know the plan thats so important that its brought Stacee Jaxx back into the limelight." Steve shook his head in bewilderment, knowing from experience that to argue with Tony when his mind was set was pointless. Thor, who had said nothing up until this point, stepped forward, summoning his hammer to his hand. "Midgardian etiquette is not a standard in Loki's attributes. Yet I agree with Stark. It is better to ascertain why he has come here." Tony shot Steve a smug smile, as Thor continued. "But know that I can no longer attempt to reason with him. There is a high risk in that which we are about to allow." Tony folded his arms, addressing Thor with a collective and authoritive tone. "I know that. But there is no 'we' in this little episode. I think its best if I talk to him alone."

Steve and Thor both shot Tony outraged glares simultaneously, as Tony began to explain himself. "Whoa, at ease gents!" he retorted defensively. "What I mean to say is that if he thinks that I'm alone, we'll have a bigger chance of working out what he's up to." Tony pressed a button on the side of the screen, causing it to ascend back to where it had came from, before returning his attention to Steve. "And if he really is as bigger a threat as Thor says, then it might be a good idea for you to sit this one out Cap." Steve advanced towards Tony furiously, offended at his belittment. "What? You think I'm not tough enough to go up against him? You think you're so much stronger than me that only you could do that? Without your suit you're the weakest out of all of us! You've got no right to tell me I don't belong in the field!" Tony eyed Steve's aggravated form calmly, realising how poor a choice his words had been.

"Look, I'm sorry" he said, struggling to resist a scathing comeback. "I didn't mean to offend you, but time is of the essence here and I really cant be doing with an argument on this. You know I have these-" Tony reached deep into his trouser pockets, producing the iron bracelets he used to summon his suit the last time he and Loki had met. "I'm fine. If he starts anything, I just need to use these bad boys again." Tony replaced the bracelets in his pockets, as Steve continued to stare at him stonily. "He's a God, and now a more dangerous one than before. I at least have some form of protection if things get ugly. You don't. I think we all agree that we wont achieve anything with all of us here, it'll just turn into another fistfight and we wont learn anything. It has to be one on one, it's the kinda guy he is. And with that new magic stick he's managed to get a hold of? I wont risk putting you in the firing line with that sort of power in the mix."

Steve continued to glare at Tony in resentment, hating the fact that he could understand his point. He was a brave man; but he was also a rational man. Loki had bested him easily when they had fought before; only Tony's arrival had interrupted that. Plus, when it came to confrontations, it was Tony that had the gift of the gab. He had to admit that much. Tony continued to look at Steve beseechingly until he could register his surrender with a stiff nod of his head. Pleased to have diffused the situation relatively quickly, Tony turned to the door, aware that Loki had been waiting slightly longer than was customary. He reached out his hand to the control panel, but as he did so, Thor stepped forward, blocking him, his eyes ablaze with frustration.

"It is I that should be confronting him Stark. He is my brother, and my responsibility. I will speak with him. There must be a way in which I can break through." Tony gritted his teeth impatiently, tilting his head to look up at the taller man with a steady confidence, that he was surprised he had the nerve to do, considering that Thor could easily crush him in two seconds flat. "I know that" he began, formulating his words to make them sound as reasonable as he could. He didn't know how long Loki would wait at that door. "But you're compromised, Thor. Emotionally. We cant risk losing out on information he might have because you let your heart rule your head." Thor clenched his fists angrily, taking a step back from Tony to control himself. Tony addressed him with a look that questioned his support. "Just let me speak to him first, and then he's all yours."

Thor looked at Tony uneasily, disliking the notion of hiding away while another man attempted to negotiate with his family. But the more he thought, the more he was swayed towards the possibility that perhaps a fresh and objective interrogator would gain larger insight into Loki's condition than he had so far. And so eventually, although he maintained his view that Loki was his to deal with, Thor confirmed Tony's query with a slow bow of his head, resigning himself in the knowledge that he would have his time of imploration afterwards. "What about Natasha?" Steve piped up suddenly, interrupting Tony and Thor's negotiation. "She's the slickest of us all, she even rivals Loki in the mind game business. She got him to let slip last time. Surely someone who can outsmart the Trickster is someone we would want here?" "We don't know where she is right now, Cap" replied Tony hastily. "On a date somewhere with Katniss, no doubt. But we just don't have time to call her here. Loki's been outside way too long. We gotta do this now."

Steve held his tongue from protesting any further, as Tony reached out to press the button that would allow Loki to enter. As he did so, he gestured hurriedly for Thor and Steve to make themselves scarce, which they did with reluctant efficiency, vanishing down the corridor into one of the mansions many rooms. Tony wasn't sure if Loki would buy that there was no one else here; he highly doubted it with the scale of his intelligence, but he figured that he couldn't remember Thor, and Steve never did really make much of an impact on him in the scale of his grandeur, so he could probably buy about 15 minutes at least. Collectively, he strolled to his liquor unit on the wall, removing his usual canister of whiskey and two glasses and taking them back to the table. After all, it was traditional for his and Loki's meetings, and he knew from his 'last request' when they had captured him last time that, crazy-God though he may be, Loki liked his Scotch. Pouring the glasses stylishly, Tony raised his head as he heard the doors slide open, allowing Loki to stroll into the room in all his swagger, until he stopped before Tony, fixing him with a casual smirk. "Finally. We meet again, Man of Iron."

* * *

Tony rolled his eyes. _These bloody Asgardians. So dramatic._ "Reindeer Games!" he replied in mock cheerfulness, raising his glass to his lips and taking a sip. Loki remained standing. "It's the same stuff as before" he proclaimed, gesturing to the other glass. "I took the liberty of pouring yours, considering we didn't quite get there last time." Loki stared at Tony with hostility, gripping his sceptre tightly in his hand._ So he obviously remembers that. And that he hates me. Fact One, gained._ Tony thought. "No? You look like you could use one" he smiled widely, draining the dregs of his glass and putting it back on the table, before leaning back in his chair and folding his arms heedlessly.

Loki continued to look at him, and Tony could definitely pick up on some of what Thor had been saying. There was a certain difference to this Loki now, not that Tony had particularly known, or been interested in him before; but definitely something behind his eyes was not quite there. The apprehension; the motivation; was all gone, he could tell that much. Finally, Loki's eyes glazed over with astuteness, as he leaned forward, picked up the glass from the table and drained its contents in a single swig. There was no movement in his face of the usual reaction one had when drinking such a strong whiskey straight. But then he was a God, Tony figured they could hold their ale considerably better than a human. Alcohol on Earth was to them, as Thor had described to him once, "as water would run over a hard rock; only magnitudes of time and excess would affect its standing."

Tony had always pitied them for that, and wondered what the drinks on Asgard must be like. He'd be lying if he said he didn't want to try them. "So, to what do I owe the pleasure?" Tony drawled effortlessly, flicking his eyes from the replaced glass to Loki's face. A small smile curved at the edge of Loki's mouth as he held Tony's gaze. "Such arrogance for one so minute" he replied shrewdly. "Come on, big fella! I thought we were past that stage in our relationship.." retorted Tony, his sarcasm truly flowing. Loki scoffed incredulously, before beginning to circle the table, evoking danger from his every pore. "I have come to inform you, that He is coming. With greater force than you can comprehend. The Realms will fall-" Tony cut him off with half amused laugh before replying.

"Whoa, whoa whoa! Getting major déjà vu vibes here Bambi. Heard it all before. You failed then, and you'll fail now. I'm always right about that." Loki stopped pacing, a few feet away from where Tony sat. "You are wrong" he breathed maliciously, moving forward to close the distance between them until Tony could feel him leaning over his back. He smelled of blood and metal. "I was foolish in my conquest, I have been shown that. But Thanos bequeaths forces beyond the limits of imagination. I advise you and your accomplices to baton down your hatches, because once he releases it, there will be no force in existence that can save you!" Loki spat the last few words with such contrived venom that Tony was surprised he hadn't been physically singed. But he had found out two things from Loki's threat so far. One: Thanos was waiting to release whatever power he held; so he either didn't have it yet, or was simply waiting for an opportune moment. And Two: Loki could still so easily be provoked. As he retreated from behind him and moved back round to the other side of the table, Tony looked at Loki amusedly.

"So whats your deal in all of this? What do you get out of it all?" he posed the question cockily, but underneath it lay the underlying intention of prying into what exactly Loki could remember. Loki returned his question with a blank look. That in and of itself was enough to convince Tony of the amount that he had changed. _Thanos was actually onto something there._ He thought, fascinated. _He's taken all that made him weak before and removed it from him. Like taking a faulty bolt from a missile; once the weakness is found and removed, it can cause total annihilation._ Pulling himself from the intriguing nature of his thoughts, Tony maintained eye contact until Loki replied. "I would think it was simple." Loki replied in an uninterested tone. "I want the destruction of your realm, and all of the other realms. Nay, I seek their spiritual destruction, so my acquired power shall be limitless."

Tony wasn't convinced. At least the last time the guy had some passion about his threats. This just seemed like a line he had drilled into himself to say. Tony saw the opportunity to test the water. "And what about your family? What exactly would they think of this plan?" Tony watched as Loki's features seemed to freeze, not in horror, but in a stunned ignorance. "One such as me has no family." He spoke in bewilderment, his mind grinding painfully with the block of mist that clouded his memory. Tony could see the confusion. He was a smart guy, he knew that it was likely that Thanos had sent Loki here intentionally; no doubt to keep them distracted or to provoke Thor. It hadn't taken him long to deduce that from this meeting. Loki carried himself with the air of someone who was stalling. But now he had gotten Loki in this position, he could see that the best opportunity might actually be to take the bait.

If what Thanos did to him could somehow be undone, he hoped that the rage Loki would have blasted back upon him could be turned against him and used to their advantage. It was worth a try at least. He had found the keg. He just had to light it. "Really?" Tony replied, feeling the creeping sense of satisfaction for his impending words wash over him as he rose from his seat. "Because I seem to remember that you did." Loki looked at him vacantly, scoffing in ridicule. "Yeah… Asgard they said you were from. And boy you were not just any common Joe on that world. You were only a Prince. Weren't you?" Tony's eyes glinted with contentment as he watched Loki fight with his words. "Ludicrous" he hissed, a fire blazing behind his eyes. _Well finally there's some emotion._ "Your attempts to postpone me are pathetic." Tony smirked knowingly.

"Oh I see what he's done. Thanos has turned you into his personal butt boy!" he grinned, prodding the poker deeper into the flames. "You don't know anything else but what he tells you. Oh how embarrassing that must be. You must kneel in front of him and kiss his feet each morning-" "I KNEEL FOR NO ONE!" Loki shrieked, as he grabbed Tony by the throat, jerking the smaller man clear off the ground in his anger. As he looked at the enraged and battle-ready expression on Loki's face, Tony couldn't help but be reminded of Thor. He managed a chortle as he struggled with Loki's wrists, before making his thoughts vocal. He knew Thor and Steve would have heard the commotion. He was going to put the last piece of his puzzle in place. "You know" he choked, fighting for breath as Loki held his grip. "You have your brothers rage."

Loki looked as if he'd been hit square in the face with a brick. "You speak words, but they are as steady as sand" he breathed decadently, before throwing Tony onto the ground before him and flipping his sceptre in his hand, in preparation to fire. Just as he was about to do so, he felt a familiar presence behind creep upon him; one that he couldn't quite pin down, or know why he knew it was there, but it was unpleasant all the same. "His words are truth, Loki." Hearing the voice, Loki turned around, slowly, to face the man standing behind him. The man he had seen before he and Thanos had vanished that last day; the one whom he had experienced such a familiar feeling when faced with. It had now returned. "The God of Thunder" he said in monotony, turning his attention away from Tony, who remained twitching on the floor, as Steve ran to his aid. They both watched, knowing better than to interfere, as Thor and Loki finally faced each other again.


	11. Breaking Through

**I hope this chapter hasnt ended up too long; I was going to split it but it just didnt work; there were some paragraphs that just had to be in the same chapter as each other! :3 will be posting the next chapter now too so this note can go for the next one as well! :3 hope you enjoy and again, thankyou!x**

* * *

Thor gripped Mjolnir tightly in his hand as Loki advanced towards him, all of the anger that had been present in his confrontation with Tony gone from his expression. Thor hated this. How Loki could still react emotionally when he spoke to Tony Stark, a man whom he cared nothing for, but when faced with his own brother, he was reverted back to stone. It was as if Thanos had deliberately sought to sever every emotional nerve that Loki had tied to Thor alone; a move that he surely knew was a veiled attack on himself, through the unorthodox means of his brothers mind. Emotional warfare. Thanos was a clever one.

Loki stopped before Thor, keeping his distance, his cold eyes fixating on him detachedly. "You truly are proving to be a thorn in my side. Everywhere I go, you appear. It makes my objective of exterminating you a fraction more curious." Thor fought to suppress the sadness he felt from manifesting in his face. "Tell me.." he began finally, attempting to keep his voice as steady as he could. "Why is it that you feel compelled to pursue such a goal? Why is it that you seek to end me, personally?" Loki blinked in surprise, a tinge of perplexion staining his blank face. "I.. seek the destruction of all of you.." he muttered, almost clumsily. "You are but one that seems to be.." he trailed off, frowning as his mindset clashed with the reality that he simply did not know why he seemed to be focusing on this particular Avenger alone.

The Avenger who was a mystery to him; the only one that he seemed to feel an unknown sense of connection with, despite being the one with whom he was the most distanced. Thor's heart jumped slightly as he registered the sudden confusion on Loki's face; the first time he had seen any kind of full expression upon it since Asgard. Swallowing hard, he moved to capitalize upon this obvious chink in his brothers armour. Hope rose within him. "What?" Thor spoke, injecting such a strength into his voice that he even shocked himself. "What do I seem to be? Familiar?" he took a dominating step towards Loki, who looked at him with a hint of alarm in his eyes, stepping further back in retaliation. Thor stopped abruptly, seeing his brothers obvious desire to be as far from him as possible. He felt the ache in his heart, but was suddenly overcome by a proposition from his mind.

_Something in him is reactive, otherwise he would not object to contact so vigorously. Perhaps forcing it upon him is the key…_Thor allowed this idea to sink in, as he continued to look at Loki, failing to keep the affection from his face. A feat to which Loki was not blind. "Why do you look at me like that?" he snapped, the vacant expression in his demeanor beginning to trickle away. He was becoming… irritated? He did not understand how this was so. A ghost of a smile played upon Thor's mouth. "I think you know" he said lightly, holding Loki's gaze with a quiet confidence. Loki stared at him in mystification, before shaking his head impatiently. "You speak in obscurities." He turned around elegantly, breaking eye contact with Thor to look at Tony and Steve again for the first time. He noted the look of self satisfied knowing on Tony's face, as the mortal flicked his eyes between himself and Thor. It was a look of superiority that Loki did not like at all.

Stopping before them, and with Thor's gaze ever present on his back, he bent and lowered himself onto his haunches until he was at their eye level. He glared directly into Tony's almond eyes, boring into them with his own icy blue ones. "You; man of iron. Before, you spoke as if you held all of the knowledge of the realms in the palms of your hands. Surely, then, you can concede to elaborate more clearly on that which this persistent warrior seems to be unable to communicate. Before I slay you once and for all." _Yeah… I got most of that…_thought Tony exasperatedly. He couldn't be bothered with such an over dramatic hold-up. He wasn't feeling in the best of ways; what with having been strangled, thrown onto the floor and almost skewered by an invincible deity, and so was not in the mood to be accepting of Thor's choice to play mysterious.

He would later probably feel regret for the apparent bluntness and insensitivity of the action he was about to take, but he simply did not have the patience to wait around for Thor to do it himself. Which, for all he knew, may even outspan his lifetime, knowing the time these gods seemed to take with things. It wasn't like they were running out any time soon. Tony propped himself up, mustering all of his bravado as he vented his frustration. "Christ, you are far too long winded for your own good. It is ridiculous. Both of you." Loki cocked his head in bewilderment, before turning it around for a brief moment to glance suspiciously at Thor; who was glaring at Tony, an eyebrow slightly raised in irritation. Loki returned his attention to Tony, reaching out his hand and grasping the collar of his shirt, pulling him closer as he threatened, danger ringing in his voice.

"Tell me, or I will end you." Behind him, Thor gripped his hammer tighter, but restrained himself. Now was not yet the time to be interfering. Tony looked as calmly as he could into the mesmeric features of Loki's face, smirking in defiance, before allowing himself to laugh in amusement, a feat that he did not know how he achieved. "Oh you are precious, you really are. It is a sad day when you're trying to wean information out of me instead of just going to the source, especially when its right behind you. I mean granted, it's a bit like getting blood out of a stone there; buggered when you want to get a straight answer but.." Thor continued to glare at Tony, unamused, as Loki cut in; "Oh that I would, but I seek to know all that _you_evoke; for you advertise such knowledge so freely. You made reference to a family of mine. A sibling of mine. As far as I have known, I have no such ties. I wish to see your words authorized before me. And from that I can tell, you seem to be in a better position to offer it than this strange pursuer. He who merely looks at me with burdened eyes and with such familiarity that I do not-" "Oh for gods sake, why cant you see that the answer is staring you right in the face? For being known as a cunning trickster who has lived for millennia, I really would have thought you'd be more intuitive than this" sighed Tony disbelievingly.

Loki glared at him in anger, as Thor balked behind him, seeing the decision in Tony's eyes before he spoke. "Lets do the calculation then, Kojack. Our buddy Thor here; he has natural powers. So do you. He is a God. Guess what? You are a God too. Hes wearing fancy prancy battle armour. Do you see any of us wearing that? No. But you're wearing the same kind. Guess what that means? You are both from the same place. Which is not here. Neither of you are wearing them now, but he has a helmet, you have a helmet. Ridiculous looking helmets that you can just magic out of nowhere. It kinda defies all my logic, but I'm not here to judge. Guess what they are a mark of where you come from? Royalty. He has one, you have one. Deduction? You are both royals. He looks at you in a way you don't understand, and you don't know how, but you feel that he is familiar to you. I mention you have a family; that you have a sibling; and that you are a _prince_and you react spectacularly. Being a royal normally consists of being in a family; a very tight knit one at that. Here are all the pieces of the puzzle, cherub, put them together and what have you got? Your 'strange pursuer' here, is your bloody brother. B-R-O-T-H-E-R. Finally someone says it outright. Didn't think I'd have to spell it out for you."

Loki gaped at Tony in confoundment, before he removed his hand from his shirt and straightened up, lowering his gaze in fervent disbelief. "I fail to see-" Loki began, before Tony interjected in irritation, the last of his tolerance draining from him. "Look there is nothing more to explain here, Einstein. He's your brother. The God of Thunder; Avenger; summoner of lightning; and your nemesis who you wanna kill; is the Edgar to your Edmund. And that means that as well as fighting your ass, he's also no doubt shared a crib with you, been read bedtime stories with you, fought over toys with you, had baths with you, got into trouble with you.. And no doubt been told to take your hand before going anywhere dangerous with you.." Tony noted the look of discomfiture on Thor's face as he hurriedly continued. "I've heard that's a bad gig that older brothers get landed with… Anyway you catch my drift. And as you can guess, you two are truly fucked up. You have a seriously complicated thing going on here. One that has brought a LOT of destruction and death to this planet. And its gotta stop. You want to know more? Speak to him. I'm out."

Tony gestured to Thor with a flick of his hand before hardening his jaw, as he continued to look Loki in the eye unwaveringly. Loki mulled over Tony's speech, his mind furiously battling with the information he had just received. He felt himself begin to reject Tony's words; convince himself that they were the words of a fool and nothing more. Yet something in him burned with the idea that these words were indeed truth. He grinded his teeth together, seeking for a release from the perplexed state of his mind. Feeling the anger at Tony rise up inside him, he made to move away, causing Tony to relax, before suddenly whipping himself around wrathfully, hitting Tony directly in the face with the corner of his spear and sending him flying backwards. "LOKI!" Thor bellowed from behind him, making his way towards him with anger returning to his eyes. "Liars and killers. As I am, so you are" growled Loki in denunciation, as he turned his sceptre towards Thor.

"You know within you that what Stark said was truth. Please do not start this-" Thor's plea was never completed, for it was cut off by a blast of energy from Loki's sceptre, that sent him rocketing across the room, crashing through the glass pane doors on the other side and out into the grounds. Loki had no other words or reactions to make; despite what he had been told, the block in his mind was a relentless one, and was already doing its best to mask the new onslaught of truth that had attempted to break through it. His slots of near remembrance were clearly limited ones. He advanced towards Thor, who had begun to pull himself up from the ground; with a methodical, and lethal, look in his eye. Thor could see that meaningless words were not going to be enough to get through to him. Glancing over at Tony, who lay with Steve by his side, he knew that the best way to help his friends, was to leave this place. Draw Loki away from them, and get him one on one; for their business was theirs; and the thought of any more suffering from the outlets of he and Loki's battles brought a chill into his bones. He closed his eyes steadily, preparing to utilise Mjolnir, which still remained glued to his right hand. As soon as Loki was close enough, preparing his next blast, Thor lunged forward from his position on the ground, grabbing him around the middle. As soon as he had a hold on him, Thor began to whir Mjolnir vigorously, until he shot up like a rocket into the sky, with Loki in tow.

* * *

The thunder rolled in the sky above, as the two Gods spiralled through the air, crashing into a dark, muddy field, not far from where they had come. Detangling himself from the mass of limbs that was himself and Loki, Thor pulled himself up, wiping the dirt from his face with his forearm, and began to climb the embankments of the crater he and Loki had created upon their impact. They had levelled out a good few square meters of land. As he reached the top, he turned to look down, where Loki had also gotten to his feet and was looking up at him, his sceptre still in hand. They glared at each other for a split moment, before Loki rapidly sent another blast of energy hurtling Thor's way. Ducking swiftly, Thor managed to avoid it, as he continued to maintain a solemn look in Loki's direction. "I have had enough of this!" he bellowed desperately, his voice husky with exhaustion. "You must fight this Loki! You must remember! Or else we will never… You will never, understand, why it is that you are the way you are! You will be a walking shell for the rest of your existence! I know that is not what you want!"

Loki stared back up at him, his body flexing as he retaliated with an aggressive leap in Thor's direction, followed by another discharge, which Thor blocked with a swing of his hammer. Ducking and diving to avoid the stabs of Loki's spear, Thor frantically tried to formulate a plan. He did not want to fight his brother, indeed he never had, but as always, his hand was forced, and so he counteracted Loki's attacks when they came, moving in largely defensive positions. After the fifth block, his rage and exasperation getting the better of him, Thor ended the battles' regality; charging forth with the power of a steam engine, as he roughly tackled Loki to the ground. Fighting against Loki's writhing resistance and dangerous, efficiently-aimed cuffs, he finally managed to pin him down with his knees, wrenching the spear out of his hand. His breathing loud and haggard with fatigue, he summoned his hammer, placing it on Loki's torso to hold him in place.

Loosening his hold, he leaned forward and pulled the upper half of Loki's body towards him as far as it could go, his hands firm around the curve of his neck. It was the same gesture he had greeted his brother with many times, in a variety of circumstances. Bringing Loki's face to within a few inches of his own, he stared intensely into his misted eyes, reaching deep beyond as if to pull out his brothers memories single-handedly. Desperate to see some sort of emotional reaction on Loki's face to show he was still real, he began to speak breathlessly. "I am not going to hold you here. I will remove the hammer shortly, and you will be free to do as you wish. I do not seek to entrap you against your will again. It is everything that you would have despised." Loki looked back, the monotonous expression still covering his face. Thor inhaled deeply, as he strengthened his hold on Loki's neck, failing to keep his desperation at bay as he began to implore his brother in his last resort.

"Listen well. You are Loki; God of Mischief, Prince of Asgard and brother of mine. We have lived through the ages of this world. Together. Our mother and father are Odin the Allfather and Frigga, the king and queen of Asgard. Odin kept a secret from you, from me, our whole lives. And when you uncovered it, you were lost to us, descending down the path of darkness that has led you here. You hated him, hated me, hated yourself. Your anger gave you strength to commit such terrible deeds. You let it destroy you. And I was not there to stop it when I should have been. But all that happened in the past means nought now, for all I have been fighting for all this time is to bring you home, to have my brother returned to me. For you were my brother then, as you are still now, and will always be, until I draw my last breath. I have known your anger, your rage, your torment. I have seen it in your eyes, but now, I see nothing. You chose to wipe it away rather than to face it. You believed you were the only one who suffered. You were not. Your pain was my pain, and I felt it every moment of each day, as I still do now. Yet I have to stay strong. I have to keep fighting; or else we shall both be lost. I must appear to be well, or else I will never be able to face the trials I must. It does not mean that you no longer affect me. I need you to look inside yourself, brother, and find that part of you that has been taken away. It will cause you pain, but you will be real once again. Not this mindless servant that Thanos has fashioned out of you." Loki felt his eyes begin to sting against his will. He did not understand what was happening to him. He struggled vainly in an attempt to free himself from this emotional plea, but Thor held him fast, lowering his voice to almost a whisper. "I made you a promise. A long time ago. And I will die before I let myself ignore it again." He smiled weakly, affection shining in his eyes. "You were never gone from me, brother. You never will be. You are lost. And I will find you and bring you back. Even if it hurts you so much that you want to scream. You asked for nothing less."

* * *

With those words, it was as if the keys had been provided to unlock the gates to Loki's soul; as if those few words were the antidote to the poison of ignorance that had veiled his mind for what seemed like a lifetime. Loki convulsed violently as a millennia of memories hacked and slashed their way back into his being. His father, his mother, his brother, his people, the warriors, the Jotuns, the realms, the Midgardians; they all flashed before his eyes in an blistering dance of triumph. Seeing his brother being attacked by an unseen force from within, caused Thor to relinquish his grip upon him, his heart thudding as he realised what must be happening. As Thor let him go, Loki dropped backwards to the ground once more, as his entire life returned to him in a relentless siege of knowledge.

Thor clamoured back onto his shaky legs, removing his hammer from Loki and standing well back, anxiety gripping him as he watched his brother continue to twitch upon the ground. He had received the memories; next came their emotions. The happiness, the fun, the fear, the jealousy, the annoyance, the resentment, the rage, the betrayal, the self loathing, the desperation, the pain, the denial, the torment, the love; they all flooded into him, as he felt his spirit writhe into a ball of agony, not knowing what he felt, his emotions now so strong and yet so confused, that he did not know how to react. And when the barrage finished and Loki was left motionless on the floor, he could feel the pain seep its way back into him, as if it had never left. He felt himself become fully reimbursed in all that he was, and all that he had made himself to be. The mischievous child, the loyal brother, the obedient son, the steady prince, and then the rejected bastard, the barbarous monster, the lying traitor, the enraged outcast and the murderous tyrant.

These were all names for how he saw himself; the labels that he had created to blot out the reality that he felt so lost; that in his anguish he had alienated himself so greatly from every realm, and from every race, that he did not have a clue where he was really supposed to belong. He was a brother, and yet he was not a brother. He was a prince, and yet he was not a prince. He was of Asgard, yet he was not of Asgard. He was Odin's son, Laufey's son, and yet he was no one's son. He was a deranged villain, and yet he was impeded by love. He had so many conflicting emotions that they had truly driven him… insane. He understood that now.

At last, with his reality shifting back into place, as if he were a ghost that had been reunited with its body, Loki pulled himself up as steadily as he could to his feet. Thor held his breath as he looked at his brother. Loki still looked down, seeing his sceptre on the ground, which he bent to pick up slowly, examining it in his hands. Once he had, he turned his head upwards slowly, where his eyes met Thor's, as he pointed it towards him in threat. Thor looked back in anticipation, wondering if his plea had worked, wondering if Loki's mind had been restored. He soon got his answer, as he saw the pain begin to fill up behind his glassy eyes. Thor felt a ripple of relief course through him, as he saw his brother look at him with all the hatred and anguish that he had not seen him exhibit for so long. He had never thought he would miss it. Granted, it was not a look he would have truly wanted, like happiness or affection, but it was better than nothing.

It was as much as Loki was able to exalt. Realising the pain that must have returned to him, Thor began to speak. "Brother, I am sorry. This is hard, I know, but you were foolish to wipe away who you are. You had a right to kn-" Thor was cut off in his tracks as Loki interrupted him, anger clinging to the fringes of his words. "_Thor_" he seethed heatedly; that one word containing so much more emotion behind it than any number of others could ever have hoped to attain. Thor continued to hold his gaze firmly, before dropping his hammer on the ground before him and raising his hands. "I see your rage renewed. We have done this for too long, brother. It must end. I will not fight you. You deserve to have your vengeance. I was a selfish fool to have tried to deny you that. Slay me as you will. Right here. Right now. I will not stop you. Fulfil your desire and then I will impede you no longer." A twinge of shock gripped Loki's face as he mulled over Thor's action; his eyes filling up in torment and frustration. He took a step towards him, sceptre in hand, as he prepared to fire.

Thor held his gaze, preparing himself for the blast that he would not move to avoid. But it did not come. For what Thor witnessed was entirely different; the same lack of conviction that had always been in Loki was apparently still evident. For just like in the previous instances when he had made attempts on Thor's life, Loki could not follow through with his ambition. He held the spear in his hand, but rather than fire and end Thor once and for all, Loki allowed his anger and frustration to possess him, as he instead tossed it down onto the dirty ground of the field before him, sending it rolling until it collided with Mjolnir a few metres away. Thor did not have time to fully register what had just occurred; for in the next moment, Loki had leaped forward unexpectedly; screaming out in rage, as he tackled him to the ground. Possessed with fury, Loki proceeded to send his fists flying into violent punches that crunched with every bit of Thor's face that they could find. Wrestling with each other as two mortals would; no weapons or powers used between them; Thor and Loki rolled, punching and kicking, as the thunder and lightning roared in the sky, sending rain cascading down upon them as they fought, the ground turning into a bog of sticky mud underneath them as it coated their bodies in filth.


	12. Summon

The air was humming with the thuds and swishes of fists, as Thor experienced the full feral brunt of his brothers rage. He counteracted the worst of Loki's blows, and caught him equally a few times in the face, but for the most part, he put up a scarce fight; too drained physically and emotionally to fight back properly. Finally, Loki began to slow down the blitz of his frenzied attack, feeling an equal amount of strain, as he let himself roll off of Thor, to whom he had been subjecting a wild barrage of punches to the face, lying breathless on the moist ground next to him. The rain continued to fall, its icy drops colliding and washing unpleasantly with the grime and blood that was smeared on both of their faces. They lay motionless and in silence, save for the sound of their heavily panted breathing.

At long last, one of them spoke, as Loki writhed slightly in the thick mud, attempting to pull himself up straight. "I did not want to remember!" he proclaimed manically, his bruised hands clenching into fists as he staggered to his feet; the grimy sludge dripping from his armour and squelching under his feet as he did so. Thor mirrored his action, wiping the dirt and blood from his face as best he could with his hands. Facing each other, covered from head to toe in brown muck and drying blood, no one who might have seen them in that moment would have ever thought that Thor and Loki could surpass as human; let alone as princes and gods. This is what their feuding had led them to; two royals, raised in privilege and regality; and they resolved to fighting in the dirt like Neanderthals.

"I told you of my pain, my suffering, and you chose to bring it upon me once more despite the fact that I finally had it eliminated! You truly think yourself so noble that it was your responsibility to 'save' me?! You spoke only of how you had wronged me and blamed yourself, playing the martyr as always. My actions were my own; you do not have the right to feel my guilt!" Loki finished in a strangled tone, as he shook his matted hair out of his eyes. Thor's head shot up instantly as he noted the slip. "So you feel guilt?" Loki's eyes widened in terror as he realised his mistake. "A slip of the tongue. You are looking for that which is not there" he shot back defiantly, setting his jaw sturdily to compose himself. "Oh but it is. You have strayed so far afield, brother, that you truly believe that the only way I could care about you would be to satisfy myself?" said Thor sadly, looking at Loki with dewy eyes. Loki returned his gaze intensely, both watching as the cuts and bruises on each others wet faces began to slowly heal. If only the other type of pain could heal so easily.

"Of course you cannot" replied Loki thickly, spitting out the blood that had formed in his mouth from one of Thor's landed hits. "I am everything we were taught to despise. Everything that you longed to kill. You cannot imagine the disgust I feel at my own self; the shame of being unwanted, overlooked, unworthy. It was all a lie. The life I lived, the people I loved, the home where I believed I belonged. All of it; nothing but a fabrication. I ask you, how would you have acted differently? That is what you fight for, mighty Thor. A LIE. We never were, nor will we ever be, a family." With this, Thor lurched forward, grabbing Loki aggressively by the shoulders in his fury. "Do not _ever_ say that again. I warn you. _EVER._" Loki forced a condescending smile to fleet upon his lips, seeing the intensity in Thor's eyes as he released his grip sharply, before distancing himself from Loki once again.

"You just cannot let me go can you? Even after all that I have done. Surely you must return my resentment. You must feel the pain I caused you, and your allies. You must see me for the monster I am. I have embraced my darker nature; yet you still do not leave me be. I warn you; do not attempt to rob me of my hate. It is all I have left." Thor swallowed, blinking tears from his eyes as he processed the raw emotionality of Loki's response. He was glad that the rain masked this, for he knew he had no right to weep at Loki's pain when he had played a part in creating it. "Loki.." he finally began, struggling to prevent himself choking on his own words. "I know the deeds you did; how you wronged me, all of us. But in truth, I wronged you in kind. I will not try and atone for the actions that were yours, but I wish you to know, as I have said before, that for all of the years when I failed you, for all the times I caused you to feel insignificant, there are no words that can describe how sorry I am. I could never think you a monster, Loki. The distortion that has fractured us, lives within your soul. I only wish you could know how much I long to restore it."

Loki looked at Thor in suppression, as the rain lessened slightly around them. "We have had such a conversation as this before. You can appeal as long as you like, Thor, but pushing reality away does not rectify that which tears us asunder. No matter how you attempt to justify it, the truth remains. We desire different things. We battle on opposite sides. We are not brothers. We never were. We are enemies. It is but fact." Thor raised his eyes incredulously, a ferocity entering his tone as he spoke. "You must have me for a fool if you thought that I believed you chose this darkness because you wanted it. Perhaps a fragment of yourself did. We all have that aspect within us. But I know that your misguided goals stem only from the pain that you have experienced. You would not choose this unless you felt you had to. I know that, and no manner of your words can convince me otherwise. THAT is but a fact."

Thor drew breath, burning with frustration as he continued. "And you know not how greatly I detest the way you dismiss our brotherhood as freely as you do. You truly believe that ones family is a matter of choice? Blood matters not. I have seen many families tied by blood on both Midgard and Asgard that care not a fraction for each other as I care for you. Family is not whose blood flows in your veins. It is who you love, and who loves you. And though you may think otherwise, you have always been loved. By myself, our father, our mother. She is tormented by your absence, calling out for you in her sleep. Do you really consider that behaviour to be of a woman who is not your true mother? You believe I would be down here, following you to Midgard in the wake of your destruction if you were not truly my brother? You believe these are the actions that would be taken over someone who was not wanted?" Loki's mouth twitched slightly as Thor continued, his face awash with sincerity.

"I wish at times that I could distance myself from this state of affairs; that I could simply go forth and loathe you as you appear to loathe me. But you are my family. My younger brother- my only brother- and I know not of a life without you in it. You have been cemented in my heart from the earliest moment I can remember. I cannot change that." Thor finished his statement with passionate breathlessness, blinking furiously as he fought to remain calm. Loki stared at Thor, before lowering his head to stare at the ground, fighting the turmoil within him. Seeing the affect his words had given, Thor moved forward instinctively, cautiously holding out his hand as he took a gentle, reassuring grasp of his upper right arm. Right where he knew the scar that marked the past was embedded. He expected Loki to recoil and shake off his touch as he normally did, but this time, he did not.

"As I have always said, you have the power in you to make amends, brother. To do good. To save us and come home where you belong. Like us all, you have a choice. It is never too late to turn back from the path you have taken." Slowly, Loki raised his head to meet Thor's eyes, adapting a fleeting smirk tainted with an indescribable sadness. Loki never truly smiled anymore. It was one thing that Thor sincerely longed for. To see a genuine smile on his brothers face. He hoped that such a sight would one day come. But it was certainly not going to come now, as Loki fought to say the words he truly wished to say. However, he did not have the chance to utter them, for before he could, he was set upon by the crippling affliction of another seizure from the energy of the cosmic cube. The attacks had stopped when he remembered nothing, but now that his battered mind had returned to him, it was once again vulnerable to its effects. Thor instinctively took Loki's other arm to steady him, rigid with concern for what was happening.

"Loki what is this?" Thor began to say. But Loki was not listening. His world had melted into a confusing pallet of obscurities. As the exhaustion returned, he slumped forward, Thor buckling under his weight as he supported him, causing them both to sink to their knees in the mud. "Loki tell me what is happening! I cannot help you, I-" Loki let out a low, muffled laugh as he tore himself away from Thor's hold, letting himself fall forward onto all fours in the mud. "It will… pass" he gasped, his head reeling. As he began to feel himself gradually recovering as surely as he had said, he heard a wailing noise, so high pitched that no human would have been able to hear. Only himself, and evidently Thor, who was glancing around in confusion as to where the noise was coming from. And then, all of a sudden, Loki's sceptre came whizzing towards him, as if summoned by an invisible force to his hand.

As was instinctive, Loki reached out a hand to catch it before it hit him, the power from it travelling upwards, revitalising him to double his strength. The mud and blood that covered his body dissipated; his armour became as shining and pristine as it would have been the day he put it on. It had begun; and Thanos was requesting his presence. He was on Asgard, he could sense it. And he himself was no longer so sure in his actions, no longer set firmly in his ways, as he heard the call and felt the pull of Thanos' power though the energy in the spear. He could not show any weakness to him. He had to stay convincing. He turned to look at Thor, who was staring at him in dismay. "You cannot-" he began frantically, looking from Loki, to the portal that had begun to form next to him. Loki continued to look back, failing terribly at keeping the confliction from his face. It was one of the very few and seldom seen instances when what Loki really felt was actually manifested in his features. Whether Thor realised this, was another matter entirely. "This is what I chose" he cut in despondently, gripping his spear as he stepped into the portal to his home world, vanishing from view and leaving Thor alone once more.


	13. Avenger Support

**Hey, hey! Sorry its been a couple of days, I have had to endure the hell of having no internet connection while work gets done in my house :( but, as Loki would say, "I have come with glad tidings!" ;) this chapter is, I think, the shortest so far, I wrote it when I was on holiday in Spain so I don't know if the different location will make it seem different (I hope not!) But this is a sort of bridge section I'd say; because after this, the story stays with Loki for the next couple of chapters, so just wanted to add in a little chapter before this happens that explains how Thor and the Avengers are able to arrive when they do later on when the story is in Loki's POV :) once again, thankyou so much and I hope you enjoy!x**

* * *

Thor stormed into SHIELD's newest secret base with a look of manic determination in his eye. His team-mates, who had been indulging in a long overdue break from the days work, looked up from their various activities in alarm. Natasha and Clint dropped their cards; they had been playing an intense game of poker for the last hour; Bruce froze in the middle of an experiment, test tube still in hand; and Steve and Tony looked up, mouths agape, from the computer they had been sharing.

They had not seen or heard from Thor in over a week. Not since he had flown off into the sky with that bloody brother of his, leaving Steve and Tony to fend for themselves. Tony still wore the remnant of the black eye he had gotten after being subjected to said brother's wrath. It had smarted like a bitch, and even now, his bones still ached. Thor hadn't checked on him; hadn't even gotten in touch with any of the team to let them know where he was or what had happened between him and Loki.

They were all beginning to fear the worst, as they often did whenever he was absent; and the collective worry was always the same. _Perhaps the bastard has finally succeeded in killing Thor after all._ It was for this reason, that the shockwave that hit the Avengers when Thor walked in was a unanimous one. The room was static. But Thor did not seem to see or notice any of them. He strode briskly past, his eyes fixed and his fists clenched. It wasn't until he was approaching Fury's office that he began to show any sort of awareness of his surroundings.

He raised a firm fist and pounded on the door, his sheer physical strength almost sending it flying from its hinges. He bellowed, his voice booming off of the walls; "FURY! WHERE IS THE SCEPTRE?!" He was met with no response. "THE TECHNOLOGY YOU CONFISCATED FROM LOKI AFTER HIS FIRST ATTACK! WHERE IS IT?" Again, there was no response from behind the metal door, where Thor knew Fury was hiding; no doubt watching him from his video surveillance. His patience was wearing thin. "I NEED IT, AND I WARN YOU, I AM IN NO MOOD FOR PROTESTS!" The room remained silent, breath bated, as the door slowly slid open.

"Thor" said Nick Fury as he stood in the doorway, regarding him in a calm and professional manner. "Please, step into the office. We can talk in here." The rest of the team, who had risen to their feet, exchanged irritated glances as Thor nodded curtly, before following Fury through the metal door, sliding it shut behind him. "Once again: I require that sceptre" said Thor impatiently as he stood in front of Fury's desk. Fury examined him with a mild sense of curiosity as he took a seat. He knew that Thor would not take it up if he offered him to have one also, so he ceased to even ask.

In his Asgardian attire, Thor looked so vastly out of place in his modernised and clinical office. It was, to Fury, as bizarre as the idea of conversing with William Shakespeare on the top of the Empire State Building. The fish out of water element was so glaring that it was bordering on the comical. "And why exactly do you need it now?" replied Fury smoothly. "You cant expect me to just hand over classified extra terrestrial technology without knowing what it is to be used for." Colonel Nick Fury had built a career on stubborn negotiation tactics. "I require it as a means to return to my home world" said Thor guardedly, fixing Fury with a demanding gaze.

"And how do you plan to achieve that? Why not just use the Bifrost, now that our intelligence says its been rebuilt-" "I cannot travel through the Bifrost" interrupted Thor sharply. "I cannot be seen to be returning to Asgard. And it will surely be under watch." Fury leaned back in his chair. "This is too cryptic. I don't like it. If this is a threat you're talking about here, then I need to know. You cant keep information that may affect planetary security to yourself. I'm not handing over that spear to you until you tell me the truth about what we're dealing with." Thor gritted his teeth as he replied. "It is not of present concern for Earth, but for Asgard that I speak."

"You've helped our planet more than once. I reckon we ought to return the favour. Tell me what's going on, and we can help you. You are a part of this team; it makes no sense for you to face this threat alone. You have allies. Use them." Thor folded his arms as he turned away to stare almost expressionlessly out of the window. He spoke in resignment. "The 'threat' that you seek to know of is named Thanos. Stark and the Captain already know somewhat of his existence. Like the Chitauri, he is not of my realm nor any realm known. He is surely the darkest character to ever haunt the world tree. His sadism and malevolence is widely infamous and feared. He seeks conquest and destruction for no other reason than to revel as he observes the suffering it produces. He is, to put it in the words of his notoriety; 'the bringer of death.'"

He paused for breath, the dying sunlight that streaked through the window catching in his golden hair as he continued. "He has always craved to bring my kingdom under his influence. For we stand at the helm of the realms; our battles and victories embalmed in legend. For Thanos to conquer Asgard would be cataclysmic on an unimaginable scale. He has attempted once in the past to seize my fathers power. Long ago, before even I came into existence. My father speaks not of what happened then; only that Thanos was foiled in his quest and faded into exile, never to be heard from again but for the whispers of rumour and nightmare. Until now." Fury clasped his hands together thoughtfully as Thor broke his gaze from the window to look at him. Fury widened his good eye and implored him to continue with a gesture of his hands.

Thor sighed deeply as he moved on. "Thanos has returned now, through means I know not, and I believe he is going to set about capturing Asgard, if he has not done so already. A plot that bodes ill for all worlds; for with Asgard; the door of conquest is forged for the remaining realms also." Fury observed a shadow forming in Thor's eyes as he went on. "And… he has recruited Loki as an ally." Fury raised his eyebrows in contempt, as he shook his head. Thor left his place at the window and returned to stand before him, his jawline tightened, as if he had barricaded himself against all the possible outcomes of that fact.

"I believe he has targeted Loki not only for the recognition of his past deeds and the knowledge he may hold, but as a means to exploit me, and indeed my family, to the vulnerability we face in his name. Loki is already in his debt, and his presence is to him, the vital tool which he lacked in his last attempt. To infiltrate the royal house, there is no greater weapon than having a lost son on side. Loki is his key to the kingdom." "And how do you know this?" "I witnessed it first hand. I saw Thanos the last time I was in Asgard, moments before he took my brothers mind before my very eyes. He could not have been clearer in his intentions." Fury held up a hand, confused. "Wait a minute, what do you mean he 'took his mind?' Last time I checked, that was pretty much gone already."

Thor glowered at Fury for a moment, as a dangerous injection of anger gathered behind his eyes. And then, in as strange a feat as Fury had ever witnessed, the anger seemed to dissipate, as Thor proceeded to lower his eyes in reluctance to answer, as if recalling the details was something he would rather have avoided. He replied, ignoring the final sentence of Fury's previous statement. "Loki has, as you know, become a victim of his own mentality. He struggles with great conflict and anger. Thanos used this to his advantage. Loki allowed him to bestow upon him an ignorance to all of his past grievances. In doing such, he became the perfect weapon, and indeed, the perfect villain, that he could never have been before." Fury brought a hand to his chin. "That doesn't sound too good for us. Is he still-" "No. He remembers" replied Thor shortly. Fury pursed his lips in response to the lack of details he had been given.

"I suppose that's where you were for the past week?" "I spoke to my brother, yes. I suspect Thanos was already in Asgard when he notified Loki to join him. And I have spent the days since searching for an alternative means to return home, without the use of the Bifrost. Until I realised that the spear contains a sample of Tesseractic force, and thus could be of use for such a purpose." Fury looked at Thor as a general would to a soldier he knew to be withholding information. His good eye narrowed suspiciously. "And how exactly did Loki respond to seeing you in light of this Thanos' plan? What did you say that brought him out-" "I do not wish to speak of it" interjected Thor abruptly, his voice suddenly as sharp as razor blades.

"All that you need to know is that which I have told you. Thanos and Loki are in Asgard now. I do not know what may have transpired. I must return to protect my people, and my family. And to do so, I need the sceptre that I asked of you. You said I was a part of this team. In which case I would expect that, I having divulged my end of what you requested of me, you would deliver it." Fury regarded Thor's rigid form in front of him, before he stood up brazenly. With a flick of his leather trench coat, he walked authoritively past Thor and pressed the button on the wall next to the door. Thor turned reflexively as it slid open to reveal the other Avengers standing behind it. It was clear that Tony had used his accustomed gadgets to allow them to hear all of his and Fury's conversation. They stood facing Thor, who looked at them in mild surprise, as Fury stood to his side, hands behind his back. Steve stepped forward.

"We're in this together. Whatever you need to do up there Thor, we're with you." Thor glanced at each of them in turn, feeling his bruised heart warming at the unity of their expressions. Any protests he might have made died on his lips, as Bruce spoke up; "I think I can harness the power in the sceptre and make you what you need. If Fury can bring it to me, and Tony his mind and tech, then I think we could be in Asgard in a couple of days." Fury nodded curtly to signify his acceptance, as did Tony. Thor was touched at their insistence, even when what they were about to face was greater than anything they had ever faced before. The only figurehead enemy that they had really gone up against in the past was Loki, and he was impeded by his emotions. Thanos had no such weakness. The prospect of facing Thanos; Asgard's ancient and malevolent enemy of old; was daunting, to say the least. Not to mention that Loki would also be there, causing additional difficulties and breaking Thor's heart as he always did. Not that such a thing was of any threat to the others. Yet, he felt suddenly strengthened by the notion of having their assistance, of not being alone in this battle. As Fury motioned for Tony and Bruce to follow him and the others went to prepare, Thor felt the beginnings of a smile form on his mouth. He stood alone for a while, before he joined them.


	14. The Conqueror of Asgard

Loki prevented himself from stumbling slightly as he materialised roughly on the very edge of Asgard's new Bifrost. So strange it was for him, as he looked around, to see its beauty again from which it seemed he had so long been parted. He had returned to Asgard last time as a prisoner, and now he arrived as a conqueror. Despite his better attempts to convince himself otherwise, Asgard was a place that Loki had accepted that he would always love. He would always call it home, at least in the geographical sense; for the familiar lure and sparkle of its golden buildings and shining sky brought a irrevocable warmth into his hardened heart, which he had long ago accepted he could not ignore. Gripping his sceptre in his hand, he began to walk forward, crossing the new bridge with a vague sense of interest, for old times sake if for nothing else.

He had after all been the one who caused its destruction in the first place, but if he did say so himself, the rebuilt version was somewhat more impressive, both in structure and in colour. As he approached the kingdom, a smell of burning began to reach him, followed by faint cries, either from women or children, or both, Loki simply could not tell. His face pricking in alarm, Loki crouched instinctively as he heard a deafening swoosh fly above his head. Intrigued, he craned his neck to look up at the beautiful night sky, which was now dotted with flying black figures, their skeleton-like visage creating an ugly stain on the tranquil landscape. _"Chitauri"_ he muttered to himself under his breath. Thanos seemed to have an endless supply of these deadly but brainless cohorts.

Of course he knew Thanos was to take Asgard; and of course he had wanted to reap the benefits of allying himself with such an intimidating force; but he had not expected the conquest to come so quick, or that it would be so unsightly. A slight part of him had hoped it would not come at all, despite his excitement at the idea. As he rounded the path and entered the city, he pushed back the sense of dread he felt at the prospect of showing his face. Even though the shame of the mad prince and his murderous schemes had most likely been abandoned for more urgent matters at hand, Loki still cursed that he allowed himself to feel guilt as he walked through the streets._ Everything I did, I did for the best. My actions are justified. I owe these people nothing._ As he continued to walk, he noticed that he had been so enveloped in his own thoughts that he had not noticed that there was scarcely a soul around him.

The air had begun to feel thick with smoke, and he could hear the shouts and grunts of Chitauri in the distance, herding Asgardian civilians through the buildings. He swallowed his resentment at this new atmosphere and pressed onwards, striding confidently in the direction of the palace to greet Thanos. As he walked into the main square, he saw it guarded by two Chitauri sentries, who stooped into bows as he acknowledged their presence. He felt the familiar sense of satisfaction at having his position respected. He knew he most likely had been revoked the title of prince in this realm since his exploits, and so accepted that they were not bowing to him in that regard, but rather in acceptance of his newfound power. He smiled crookedly to himself as he walked into the middle of the square, where he saw huddles of citizens being led past with Chitauri shears at their back. He blinked in visible shock, as the miserable faces of the men, women and children who had been his people, were forced past, the hurt and hatred blazing in their eyes as they glared at him.

He did not expect to oppose this as vehemently as he felt. He turned his eyes to look ahead, where he saw the beautiful single tower of the Jirnar; an old warriors library that he and Thor had often taken to playing in during their youth. He walked towards it, his lips pressed together in a hard line; blotting out the cries and shrieks around him. He and Thor had loved to race to the very top of the tower when they were children; a total of 500 steps upwards. At the small room at the tower's peak, there was a sturdy block of wood on the wall, that had most likely been used for records of some kind at some point in time. When they had played their games, they would mark whoever won with a single knot underneath their carved initials of 'T' and 'L'. He could not remember who had gotten the most in the end. They had grown out of such pastimes once they became teenagers. But something within Loki spat bitterly that it was probably Thor.

The top of the tower had been blown open. That was the first thing that Loki had noticed as he stopped before it. The debris was surprisingly scarce; the worst of it no doubt cleaned up, but the hollow inside of the tower gaped open like an ugly hole. Loki fought the tears that were trying to form in his eyes._ It was a building. Mere bricks and mortar._ But still he cursed Thanos. Cursed him for causing physical damage to his kingdom. That was not what he claimed his intentions were. He lowered his eyes, before noticing a large shard of wood lying on the ground. He swept off the dust with his feet as he looked down at its flat surface. As he saw what was engraved on it, he scowled in an extraordinary mixture of resentment and sadness, before kicking it aside and making his way onwards to the palace. The block of wood had been blasted from the wall in the attack on the building, but the inscription was still visible, the deep engravings of a jaggy T and a wiggly L etched on its once-polished finish. Underneath them, was a sheet of tallies. The score was even.

* * *

Though the place where he had once lived did not look much different, Loki could immediately sense that it was not the same palace that he had left. For one, he recognised no faces; the halls were bare, populated in small instances by only Chitauri guards. His fists clenched at his sides, Loki walked authoritively past, stopping before the great doors to the main hall. He had stood on this spot many times, since childhood, to greet his father._ No. Odin._ But as loathe as he was to acknowledge it, the fact that he now stood on this spot to greet his greatest enemy, made Loki feel worryingly ashamed and uneasy. He wondered where Odin and Frigga were. He knew Thor was safely trapped on Earth and unable to interfere, but he could not deny the concern he had for his once-parents whereabouts.

He secretly hoped they had somehow fled, not only because deep within him he dreaded seeing the betrayal and shame in their eyes if he met them again, but also because he did not know what Thanos was going to do with them. He had taken no liberties in handling Asgard with brute force as of yet. Steadying himself, Loki took a deep breath and heaved open the door to the hall. As he entered the room that had always been his fathers, he felt an unwanted surge of anger as he saw Thanos perched lazily on his throne, his mouth widening into a sinister smile as Loki approached him. "Trickster! How glad I am to have you join me! As you can see, your knowledge of Asgard's defenses was most valuable. I gained control of this kingdom so much quicker than I had intended. It was almost too easy." _Of course. I told him everything I knew. Why would I not? _Loki stopped before him, clasping his spear with both hands in front of him so as not to betray the shaking anger in his limbs.

He was conscious that Thanos did not know that his spell upon him had been reversed. He did not know the full extent of Thanos' abilities; for all he knew he could easily see through any illusion he might conjure, but it was in his nature to lie, and it was worth a try to keep up a façade of ignorance in any case. He might not approve of what Thanos was initiating thus far, but Loki had a clever head on his shoulders; keeping up appearances may buy him more time to think out the whole situation and uncover a means to manipulating it in his favour. Something he should have really done before he got involved with Thanos to begin with. But he was anything but his level headed and stable self back then, when he had first stumbled into Thanos' company. Of course he knew Thanos took advantage of that. He would be a fool otherwise. He cleared his throat before speaking with carefully constructed words, determined not to betray the slightest hint of emotion in his voice. "I am glad. I can see you have taken to moulding the kingdom to your liking."

Thanos smirked. "Yes indeed. Of course when one conquers Asgard the first to be taken care of is the Asgardians! Put up a remarkable fight did they, as was to be expected. But my forces were simply too great for them to withstand, in addition to the absence of their golden hero and the imprisonment of his warriors. I barely got any fun. Which is why I have decided to rally them all up into confinement. We will have uses of them as of yet. I always find means to entertain." Loki's teeth remained clenched in his mouth, as he raised his eyebrows in apparent approval. Thanos swung himself up off of the throne in a flash, his cold eyes drilling into Loki. "But fear not, Trickster. You shall have as I promised you. I do not seek to be king of this realm. You shall have what is rightfully yours" He smirked again as he stepped aside, making a sweeping gesture with his arm to the empty throne seat. Loki had to remind himself to breathe.

He had wanted to be king, that could not be denied. Perhaps not at first, but certainly after his fall from grace in the eyes of his father. But never a controlled king. If he were to rule, he would want it on his terms, not as a mere pawn in Thanos' plans. He had too much pride to allow himself to be used in such a manner. He cursed himself again for succumbing to this giant brute in his lowest place. Loki of Asgard would not be controlled by anyone. Yet he had to think about his answer; revealing his resentment would be revealing an emotion, and he had no desire to do such as of yet. "With thanks I give, Thanos, but I have ascertained that I would first like to observe and maintain the progress of the conquest before I take up this right. I have been absent for its majority." Thanos smiled menacingly, and Loki was filled with a creeping sense of dread. He stared at him blankly until he finally continued; "Also, the Avengers still dwell on Earth, and I believe the Thunder God may have alerted them as to our invasion. The paths between worlds may be blocked but they have proved to be tenacious before in their battles. It is a potential threat we may have to be aware of." Again, Thanos merely smiled, a dangerous threat of knowledge dancing behind his eyes.

"Of course. We shall be prepared if such occurs. The Midgardians should be of relative ease to dispose of. It is the God of Thunder in whom we will take the greatest glory in defeating. As I promised, the waiting will not be in vain, dark one. I shall leave the intricate killing of him to you, as you please; and we shall make it public for all of this realm to see that their precious prince is no more! Then their spirit will truly break. I shall enjoy that." Loki swallowed down his horror and transformed his face into a malicious grin. "Indeed, I look forward to said day." Thanos merely looked at him in response, betraying nothing. Loki wanted to know the answer to a question that was on his mind, but he had to construct it in a completely emotionless manner. This took him a few moments to do, as Thanos had began to turn from him. "And what has become of Odin?" he said coolly. Thanos turned around with a wicked glint in his eye. "Using your knowledge, I was able to access the means to extend the Odinsleep. For the true conquest of this realm and all others, the Odinforce has to be extracted. So he cannot be killed as of yet. It is a feat I may require your assistance with, Trickster. The means to extract it from him while he is helpless. Then, he can be disposed of."

Loki gave a curt nod of his head, as he separated his hands, believing them now steady enough to rest by his sides. He could not say that the prospect of the Allfathers end was not a glorious one to him. The warriors were contained in the palace dungeons or somewhere of the like, and he knew that. Odin was in the Odinsleep, soon to be eliminated. Thor was unable to return from Earth. He was inching closer to achieving all that he had set out to achieve. With the exception that he had not originally anticipated Thanos would be a driving force in such. But alas, those who he had wanted out of the way, seemed to have been dealt with efficiently, and so he was slightly grateful in that regard.

And then suddenly, Loki felt a sinking in his chest as his heart skipped a beat. He had not thought about someone._ Mother._ Try as he might, Loki could not disregard her as being anything else. He could call Odin by name now with relative ease, but when it came to Frigga, that was physically impossible. He could not think of her as being anything but his mother, in spite of the fact that it had been so long since he had seen her. He was still her son when they had last met. Still within reach of redemption. In comparison to what he was now at least. Thinking of her made him ache in ways he wished he could forget. She probably detested him now for the deeds he had committed. Frigga could never love someone who had done such terrible things. She was too good. He bit down on his pain, determined to drive her from his mind. He wanted to enquire about her, but asking questions about both of his once-parents was in high likelihood of increasing his chances of being exposed. "I trust you can make yourself at home in one of the rooms which you will be acquainted with?" Thanos' gruff voice broke Loki harshly out of his meditative state.

"Yes" he replied quickly and calmly. Thanos grinned, before moving to the door. "I go now to check on our obedient citizens. When you have a moment, it is of great importance that you visit the Allfather's chamber. I believe you may be able to extract the Odinforce using your magic. The most powerful sorcerer in all the realms is the only one who possesses the means, I believe, to do so. But it must be done as hastily as is possible." Loki was locked in Thanos' gaze. "I have brought with me a very much famed and sacred book, one which I acquired from a previous endeavour. It is of the darkest arts; a book long lost in all of the nine realms. If the spells within are used in conjunction with a great mind and with great magic, it is the book to Odin's soul. It resides in the chamber with the Allfather. I trust you will explore its contents." Unable to do anything else other than nod curtly once more, Loki waited, bating his breath, until Thanos strode from the hall, leaving him alone in the bare chamber that was a part of what was once his home. He did not know what it was now. He felt no joy, no satisfaction, no power. Only confusion, anger and emptiness. Yet he betrayed none of this, even when in his own company, as he set off down one of the adjoining corridors to the room where the Allfather slept.


	15. Unlocking The Lost

Loki finally opened the golden clad door to Odin's chambers, after strolling through the halls surrounding them for a good while. The walls held for him his memories, his whole life; and yet they now seemed to be nothing but alien; so barren that walking amongst them made Loki feel like a ghost, walking the halls of a place he had, in life, once known. He had taken his detour partly out of his own nostalgia, and partly because he dreaded the very idea of being in the Allfather's presence, even if he was not conscious to receive him. Odin would always haunt the dark recesses of Loki's heart, long after he was gone.

This was a chilling fact that Loki knew he could never escape from. And so, when he entered the still grandly lit chamber, his silhouette casting dark shadows on the marble floor, he felt a familiar pressure in his chest. His heart squeezed into itself, allowing him only quiet breaths, as he slowly approached the glowing bed. Even when he lay comatose, Loki still felt Odin's condescension. His disappointment. His lack of belief or interest in any of Loki's attempts to prove himself to him. _No, Loki._ He remembered those words, as he looked into the aged face of the man who had been his father. He liked to tell himself that he had long surpassed the childish need for his approval. That he no longer cared what Odin thought of him. He had made it clear that he was the lesser son, even when Loki had been hanging on the brink of his own suicide. Indeed, his very words were what caused him to let go and fall. There was nothing left in Loki that felt anything for this man other than hatred. Or so he convinced himself.

Removing his eyes from the bed for a moment, Loki glanced over to the rounded oak table which stood to its side, and had upon it, as surely as Thanos had promised, a large and ancient book, covered with swirling runes. An insatiable sense of curious excitement rose within him, as he realised that this was it. The Lost manuscript, the antiquated and feared volume, which contained within its pages all of the secrets to unlocking true dark magic. Loki had heard of such a treasure from his past dealings and schemes long before Thanos had brought it into discussion. Thanos had succeeded in finding it; that which no manner of creature had been able to for over 1000 mortal years. It was last rumoured that the book had been hidden in the clutches of the Dark Elves, a rumour that Loki had surmised to be truth when it suddenly appeared in Thanos' hands. Thor had beaten their leader, but Loki had no doubts that in order to gain possession of the coveted book, Thanos had been working from the shadows to snatch it from under their noses whilst both sides were preoccupied with the war at hand.

It would not have surprised Loki if Thanos had convinced the Dark Elves himself to incite the wrath of Thor and the warriors of Asgard, simply so that he could gain access to their vaults and take the book for his own plot whilst their own was being executed elsewhere. It was what Loki would have done. Thanos was intelligent, and he was efficient. He was always able to somehow gain exactly what he wanted. Loki admired this. Yet, despite his skills in acquiring the book, Thanos, nor indeed any other creature in recent memory, had possessed the ability to unlock and utilise its contents. Bound shut and heavily riddled with coded symbols which, Loki had heard, could only be read by one who knew true darkness, it had proven to be virtually useless to any force which may have found it. Except, for Thanos, there was Loki. He seemed to think Loki would be able to succeed where countless others had failed. He did not know if it would be true; he was sure there were plenty of characters in the nine realms who had magic and had experienced greater darkness than he; but Loki was never anything but a trier.

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He walked over to the book slowly, extending his fingers to brush them lightly over the engrained front cover. He began to delicately trace the grooves that formed the runes upon its surface, following them with his forefinger and furrowing his brow in thought. He turned the book carefully in his hands, and noticed immediately the bronze plate that barricaded the pages shut. It was clear that more than just mere magic would be required to release the lock that held it in place. Loki frowned, as he turned the book back over again to examine the cover. The key must be the decoding and recital of the runes upon it, that much to him seemed to be fairly obvious. But the runes were of an ancient and unknown language, one that even Loki, with all of his profound intelligence and experience of the darker realms, could not decipher.

Of course, an item that contained such power as this book; the power of the darkest magic and the only known means to truly kill the Allfather; was always going to be heavily guarded. The ancients of the realms were a through people. Loki sighed, as he placed both hands on the cover of the book and closed his eyes. Entering a zone of complete concentration, he willed all of the molecules of magic within him to come forward, to help him forge some sort of connection with this equally magical artefact he held in his hands. Simultaneously, he summoned every fathom of knowledge he could to the forefront of his brain, combining the two greatest forces in his arsenal, as he commanded the runes to unveil themselves to him. Having given everything he could, and feeling the familiar sensation of magic flowing down his arms and into his fingertips, Loki hopefully cracked his eyes open a fraction.

He peered at the book, as he tried to make himself understand the symbols on its surface. Nothing. They were still as intelligible to him now as they had been before. Agitatedly, Loki repeated the procedure a few more times, with no luck, before sinking into the chair next to Odin's bed, and dropping the book into his lap in frustration. He wanted this book to open. Now, not just for Thanos, but for the testing of his own mettle as a sorcerer. It was the one talent he had that no other could parallel, and the thought of it being insufficient enough to aid him when he needed it was a prospect that made him feel like even more of a failure than he already believed. He brought his hands upwards to his eye level and buried his face in them. The more he allowed himself to become involuntarily absorbed into his own thoughts, the more he began to reflect on the times in the past when his magic had been at its strongest. His natural magic, before and behind the power of the Tesseract.

He remembered all such instances; the feeling and experience of having such power and knowing that it call came from within him alone; not from any external forces or influences but from inside himself. Wearing the shroud of such memories and experiencing their glory, the remnants of logic in Loki's mind unconsciously began to seek out the common denominator. The constant presence or force to which his abilities had become accustomed, and always seemed to be around when their strength was heightened. He searched his soul, scraping the surface for fear of falling deeper, and sought out the picture of his inspiration; which was in kind his nightmare; his saviour, which was also his persecutor; and his ray of light, which was in turn his deepest darkness.

He hadn't even meant to think of such thoughts, but such a state had silently occurred, without Loki even being aware of it. He was used to such idle mediations by now. Abruptly, he was brought out of his trance. He could sense a change in the air. Something was different; he recognised the vibrations of a new and exquisite form of sorcery in his midst. It was awakening. An expression of exhilaration seemed to cast a radiant glow across the shadows of Loki's hardened face, as he glanced down at the book in his lap. His heart thudded as he realised he was beginning to understand what was written on its surface. Slowly, but surely, the words were making themselves known to him, for a reason and by a means which even Loki could not understand. He stared intensely at the words as he read the forming inscription that no other had been able to read for a millennia.

_To those whom bear the book of the Lost; _  
_whom have taken into their minds the tongue of the dreaded arts, _  
_let it be known that upon thine head, thou shall receive the pity of the ancients. _  
_For only a creature truly broke, worthy of stain upon soul and life,_  
_shall be as greatly damned as to wield the pages of the Dark volumes. _  
_Only a villain which hath had the world, and lost it all in kind,_  
_may take hollow solace in the cursed union of wrath and alchemy ._

_This volume which thou dost hold,_  
_shall be released when unto thine self the truth is told. _  
_Think aloud the lonely word which vexes thine soul to its very core; _  
_which ruins thee, and bears the heart thou hast many a time tore. _  
_Speaketh of the one, _  
_and the skills of darkness thou shalt have won._

Loki exhaled deeply after he finished reading; he had almost forgotten to breathe as he absorbed the startling passage before him. He looked at the book, feeling such a sudden and uncontrollable hunger for its knowledge and power that his hands began to shake with impatience. The directives of the writer had disturbed him; he had the harrowing feeling that they were somehow speaking to him directly, despite no doubt being written long before he came into existence. He had no need to search for the word that would unlock the book; he already knew it. It was the very word he had vowed never to say again. The irony of the fact that this single lamented word would be the very means by which he gained access to what he wanted, could not be overlooked. Unintentionally, as he removed his gaze from the books cover, his eyes fell on the sleeping figure of Odin. His fingers twitched slightly as Loki's eyes reached him.

He could have sworn he saw them move. He remembered his mothers words about the Allfather still being able to see and hear them, even when in Odinsleep. This notion both disturbed Loki, and pleased him. For he wanted Odin to know that he now held the instrument of his destruction; he wanted him to witness the unworthy, overlooked son whom he cared so little for, rise up and take vengeance. This desire, at the present moment, far outweighed any doubts or fears Loki may have had. He stood up harshly, turning his back to the bed and returning the book to the table.

One word. Once he said it, the secrets and power of the forgotten arts would be his. One word. It mattered not what the use of said word may mean, or what it may prove; what mattered was the spoils it would produce. That was all. Loki lifted the book once again to his eye level, his throat tightening in anticipation, as he closed his eyes and uttered aloud a single word. "Brother." As the word was carried in the air to the books surface, the swirling runes began to illuminate, a blood red light filling in the blankness of their grooves and spreading, until the bronze plate around the books side slid open with a grating snap. Loki opened his eyes. A silent tear slid down Odin's cheek.


	16. To Kill An Allfather

Loki held his breath as he tactfully opened the cover of the book, handling it as if it were as fragile as glass. He flicked through the ancient, yellowed pages in awe, overcome by the sheer dexterity of spells which lay within them. Before he turned to the page regarding the Allfather, Loki stopped at several pages which interested him. This was an opportunity that he could not let slip through his fingers. As was in his nature, Loki had to satisfy his curiosity and hunger for his own benefit. He uttered a few tracing spells; ones which essentially copied the pages of the spells he chose, electing for them to become etched, and masked over, on his silver gauntlets. He was pleased to have something of the book on his person, which he could utilise to assist him at a later date if he so needed it. Plus, the dark arts had always been of an irresistible interest to him. Suddenly remembering Thanos and the reason he had come to the chamber, Loki hastily flipped through the book until he came to the page about the Allfather. Or, rather, a page entitled_ 'To destroy a force which cannot be destroyed'_. Intrigued, Loki skimmed over the instructions with quizzing eyes. Scanning the words, a lump formed in his throat when he read the description.

_"To cut down a great tree, one can simply hack the bark with axe and metal, and so the tree will fall. The tree shall plummet, yet the stump shall remain. So one then must unsurp the roots; seize the remains from the earth, so that the tree shall never reach upwards again. In doing such, this tree shall be gone. Yet, a father tree shall always shed seeds. Acorns; saplings, that are as much of a necessity to the trees survival in the universe as is its own corporeal self. In the saplings survival, so the tree will live. Such is to destroy one that cannot be destroyed, be not as simple as thrusting blade through flesh, or rope around neck. So, to strike he dead, and stay dead, one must eliminate the souls which are beloved by the force which is invincible. Only though such love, can a weakness be sought; only by robbing the tree of its saplings, shall the father tree surely die."_

Loki blinked incredulously. This method necessary to kill the Allfather seemed to be, worryingly, much simpler than he had expected. He read on. _"And be it that the force is not a stealthy man, nor indomitable creature, but a God-"_ Loki inhaled sharply at the books seemingly animate knowledge of its reader._ "- then one must forge a blade upon fire and ice, and stain upon that blade, the blood and pain of those whom carry his heart within their own. For when the father of all gives one his love, to such a person his heart becomes bound. Sever such ties; shed the blood of such souls; and the blood with which he hath given life, shall take it from him. And as such upon this death, the great powers of the Realms shall be the assailants to command."_ Loki finished reading, his body unconsciously rigid from the potency of the books instructions. He bit his lip as he stared at the page. _Thor and Frigga. Thor and Frigga._ Their blood would be the only means to end Odin as Thanos wished. He felt uncertainty bubble in his chest. _Could he?_

He glanced back over at Odin's sleeping form, and back to the book. _Shed their blood. It did not mention the word 'kill'. It did not specify death. Perhaps a cut is all that is needed.._ Loki knew there was always a loophole to everything when it came to standard magic; he had no reason to believe that such did not occur tenfold in the darker arts. He wrung his hands, as his mind went into overdrive. At such a moment, he heard a deafening collision in the distance, followed by reverberations that caused even the palace around him to slightly shake. Was that.. Is that.. His heart slowed, as he eyed his sceptre, which he had brought with him, as was now his custom. _Acting more like him every day._ The doors suddenly clanged open majestically, as Thanos marched into the room, his eyes teeming with the rage of a potential battle.

"They have arrived" he announced with pleasure, looking at Loki with sheer glee. "To challenge them is to court Death; oh how I adore engaging in such a romance." He smirked at Loki, who returned it, so immaculately that it was unnerving. Thanos eyes reached the open book, as a leering grin spread across his face. "You have unlocked its secrets, Trickster. I expected nothing less." Loki's smirk widened further. Thanos reached his side, and leaned over to glance at the pages inscription. Loki followed his gaze, as he said calmly; "The blade can be forged with ease, such as what every creature with magic can- " Loki was interrupted bluntly by the harsh movements of Thanos hands, as he conjured out of his own fingers, a blade made from ice, which he then cauterized by conjured fire and sealed with an icing of magic. Loki raised his eyebrows in approval as Thanos handed him over the blade to examine, with an almost bored look in his eye. He did not waste any time.

Loki held it as he grinned and moved on. "Well, now with the blade forged, all that must be done, is a sample of shed blood from Thor and the Allmother. Then, Odin can be slain and the Odinforce extracted." Thanos nodded happily, with a glint of delight laughing behind his eyes. "I shall have a Chitauri collect them. You and I must maintain a low profile if we are to succeed in extracting the Odinforce before anyone can interfere. We have the Allmother contained, and The Thunder God fights upon the perimeter of the city with his allies. It should not take long for the blade to gain a drop of both their blood." Loki's heart lurched as he thought of his mother. Thor could bleed, and bleed well he knew, and so the prospect of him receiving a simple cut was not something that Loki found alarming. But his mother on the other hand… He snapped out of it as quickly as he could when he remembered he was in Thanos' presence. She would not die, and that was the main thing.

He handed the blade back to Thanos, who took it with a nod, as he strode to the door to give a Chitauri its orders. Inside his cold veneer, Loki felt numb. Thanos turned outside the door, to look back at him. "Remain within the chambers, and the Chitauri I have just commanded, will return shortly with what you need. I go now to battle." Loki nodded curtly as Thanos left, while feeling a horrible fear lurch within him. _Why would he not come back to oversee the killing of Odin? Why would he leave the most important and key ambition he has to I alone and not even seek verification of his glorious achievement?_ Something did not feel right. Loki always had a knack for understanding when someone may have a gameplan. He now had little doubts that Thanos knew he could remember everything, yet he still played along. He couldn't find any way out of this predicament. He dropped his head into his hands, as he admitted, with a groan of anger, that this was not likely to turn into anything pleasing.

A relatively short while later, the Chitauri appeared, as Thanos had commanded it to, giving Loki the reddened blade before taking its leave. Loki swallowed as he examined it, seeing the tinges of red that were from his- from Asgard's- royal family. He squeezed his eyes shut and opened them again to rid the image of his mother from his mind. Taking a deep breath, he steeled his resolve as he moved towards the Allfather, gripping the hilt of the blade tightly in his hand. He forced himself to remember everything Odin had did to him; every moment when he had made him feel insignificant and unwanted. He thought of his mockery; convincing him he had his love, yet betraying him and neglecting him for the name of his own honour. He thought of how he had ripped his heart and very existence limb from limb and still claimed nobility, how he had destroyed his life, and consequently, the life of his brother. The returning anger that was consuming Loki was so great that he could not locate the corrective function in his brain that he usually would apply when he thought of that word. It was natural and instant, and he did not have the determination to deny it on this occasion.

Tears of rage and hurt filled his eyes as he leaned over, and passed his fist through the coffin of golden light that cocooned Odin's bed, allowing the blade in his hand to hover a couple of inches above his heart. He spoke in a shattered whisper, as the muscles in his face contorted. "You did this to me" his eyes were sorrowful, yet animated by wrath. "I am an addict to death; a monstrosity. Forever damned, by your own noble hand" He fought to keep his hand steady. "Never was I good enough. Never did I ever receive your love. And now you have ensured that everything I touch turns to ash." His heart was beating faster, but his breath was catching in his throat. "And not only this, great Allfather, but you have signed the death warrant of your beloved Thor. For he still believes, still fights, for my return. You have doomed him to devastation. For the potency of his love serves only as a reminder of the lie that was yours. I can do nothing but reject it. The only person who keeps his faith in one who can bring him only pain. He bears the brunt of the ills meant for you, when he was as ignorant as I. You have sentenced him to a scar of a content life. I cannot give him what he seeks; because you have shown me, in the barest, coldest form; that to love is only to destroy." Loki lowered the blade slowly. He had nothing else to say. He closed his eyes and pressed down.

It was like he was pressing against solid stone. His eyes flew open. He tried again. Nothing. The blade would not pierce the skin. It was as if Odin was wearing a protective armour. It was impossible; such an incident was the norm when a God was confronted with a mortal weapon, but this blade was forged with fire and ice, and magic, in accordance with the book of the Lost._ It should have worked._ He stared from the Allfather, to the knife and back again many times, trying to work out what could have gone wrong. Everything had been done as planned. He had the blade, he had the blood of Thor, the blood of Frigga.. He had the blood of Odin's most beloved; his family. He could not understand… Then a thought came to him. A flying thought that he would never have been so naïve or stupid to have thought of before. _No.. It cannot be. Such an act would be of sheer stupidity on my part and an overestimation of the Allfather._ He looked over at Odin again with darkened eyes as he straightened up. _He does not. He never did._

He held the blade unsteadily over his own hand. This was ridiculous. Odin destroyed his life and threw him away like he never mattered. Loki could never be one of his connections to invincibility. He would never have allowed something as vital as that to develop. He was not a part of his family. Loki gritted his teeth, as he felt a renewed anger rise at the Allfather and his tenaciousness. He spoke aloud, his voice a quiet husk. "If this is so… your cruelty knows no inhabitations." Loki sighed deeply, his eyes uncertain. He opened his palm and placed the edge of the blade, which contained Thor and Frigga's blood upon it, onto his own. He glanced over at the Allfather, not breaking his gaze, as he sliced downwards into the skin. He did not even notice the pain; all he could feel was his own dread. He finally removed his eyes from Odin to look at the blade. It seemed to look different; almost glowing. He pressed his lips together as he leaned forward again with the blade in his hand, neglecting to wrap up the cut on his other. It would heal. He hovered the blade above Odin's heart again, the backs of his eyes beginning to sting, as he gently pressed down, not enough to puncture, but enough to feel impact. The rock-like shell that had been present before had evidently dissipated; as Loki felt the blade press against living, vulnerable skin. He gasped out loud in a mixture of heartbreak and shock, as he bowed his head to stare at the dagger. The only words he could create was a curse, which he spat in strangulation. "Wretch. You callous wretch."


	17. Hard Truths

**Thankyou so much for reading! Means so much that you guys are liking it! Next chapter will be up tomorrow; and it was one of my favorites to write! :3 hope you like!x**

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_"Do it. Do it"_Loki commanded himself over and over in his mind. Yet what his mind commanded, his body; or perhaps his soul, did not obey. Each time he would raise up the blade in his hand, and bring it down upon Odin's chest, and each time he would falter, pulling it away at the last second before it reached his skin. He was willing, and able, to execute this act before; mere minutes ago. He had been ready. He had seen Odin's death in his mind's eye. But then the blade had failed to penetrate. The blade that must have the blood of Odin's family; those to whom his heart was bound, in order for the protection around him to fade. It hadn't worked.

Not until, out of some spontaneous act of childish stupidity, Loki had shed some of his own blood upon the blade too. Then, and only then, did Odin become exposed as had been intended. _This is deliberate._ Loki thought bitterly. _Odin purposefully created this, so that if I ever sought to wreak vengeance upon him, it would be at my own peril._ Odin really had distrusted and hated him from the beginning. He raised the blade again. For all of his intelligence and wit, Loki had become, in his grievances, blind to clarity. His vehement beliefs in his once-family's attitudes to him had become so set in stone with bitterness, that they had blinded his cunning mind and caused him to become elusive to facts that others would consider to be rather obvious. He held the knife in his hand, but knew it was pointless. Odin had ensured that he could not carry out his goal. He remembered the last words of the mortal agent he had killed, what seemed like a lifetime ago. _You lack conviction._

He gritted his teeth. He stared at the blade, as he heard the battle raging outside. A forgotten part of him suddenly emerged as he felt the war in the air. The warrior. For that was what he was; what he had been brought up to be, alongside his brother. He no longer wished to be in this room; protected by the walls of the palace, yet so exposed to Thanos' fury. He had played the conqueror as of late, his fighter attributes being pushed aside for more sloppy and power-hungry tactics rather than being used in the field. Loki had always been a trickster; the cunning kind who slipped in to situations quietly, and with a calculated head on his shoulders. But that did not mean that he did not enjoy the fire of battle. When he saw fit, he would smooth talk his way out of conflicts, as opposed to reacting physically like Thor would, but when Loki did catch the scent of a battle he wished to be engaged in, he was a truly threatening adversary.

Not only did he have the additional benefit of magic at his disposal, but Loki was also an expert, as all noble Asgardians were, at hand to hand combat. Skilled with daggers and blades, Loki was as lethal in the rage of battle as Thor was. Their fighting styles were different, yet both were equally as effective. Such was the case that the only real fights he had been engaged in since his exile, were with Thor. Which, to any outsider looking in, was nothing short of a waste; for when pitted against each other, Thor and Loki became the volcano and the tornado; two skilled and dangerous forces of nature clashing and battling against each other for dominance, leaving destruction in their wake. Separated, their battles were sustained, wreckless and exposed. Yet when their forces were combined… they became an impregnable fortress of sheer power and expertise, the result of which boded doom for any opponent. The loss of this power, was something which weakened Asgard more than anyone could know.

Loki was bubbling with rage and confusion; more potent now than it had ever been. He longed to let it out. Examining the dagger he still held, he expressionlessly tilted the piece of the blade that had his blood upon it, and wiped it inside his tunic sleeve. He looked at the book again. Thanos had only merely glanced at it; he had not read its full contents. He knew only that Thor and Frigga's blood were the key to killing Odin, not his own. He could not afford to let him know this. Loki admired Thanos, but he did not, for a second, trust him. He recognised some attributes of himself in the fearsome giant, and knew that he would gladly sacrifice one of his 'allies' if it meant achieving his objective. In the realms to which he had been subjected, he had learned that it was either kill; or be killed.

He decided he would tell Thanos that the dagger would only work at the setting of the sun; for it was the time of day that the Allfather always entered Odinsleep, and so it was at that point that the sleep would be at its deepest, and he at his most vulnerable. It would buy him some time, and he could hopefully make a quick getaway before Thanos realised the truth. He wasn't certain if Thanos would buy it, but he had nothing to lose, and so was willing to at least try. He flipped the cover of the book shut, hearing the bronze plate snap into place as the red runes disappeared. Only he could open it again. For now, he did not have to worry about Thanos finding any proof contrary to what he was going to tell him. It eased his mind, albeit slightly. Inhaling deeply, and with a final reproachful look at Odin, Loki slipped the blade into his holster, and strode from the chamber.

As surely as Loki had re-entered the throne room, Thanos materialized before him, looking haggard, and thrilled. Loki was almost startled, and began to understand how unnerving it must have been for all of those to whom he had done the same. "The battle falters for the time being. But they will resurge. It shall commence again." Loki nodded curtly, as Thanos advanced towards him. "My attempt to assassinate Odin did not go as smoothly as planned. His defence is strong. But, I have ascertained that the blade may only be used to full working effect when the Allfather is in the deepest part of Odinsleep. I was… accustomed to the habitual process of the sleep for the greater part of my life; and can say with certainty that such a moment shall occur with the setting of the sun. Which, the sun already having set on this day, shall be best executed tomorrow." Thanos smiled. "This is most inconvenient, Trickster. But it is bearable." Thanos scanned Loki from head to foot, making him feel a sudden surge of vulnerability; as if every part of him was suddenly exposed, right down to beneath his very skin.

Loki suppressed a shudder as he maintained a hard gaze at Thanos' face. Thanos withdrew his attention, placing his fingertips together as he addressed Loki in the eyes. "I would ask that you return the blade to me for the time being. You shall still have the privilege of killing Odin, but I wish to keep it with myself incase the Allfather has managed to place any sort of enchantment upon you that may put our plan at risk." Thanos held out a thick hand. Loki felt cold dread trickle through him, as he reached into his holster and handed over the blade, his eyes and hand as steady as he could force them to be. Thanos took it swiftly, tucking it away within his armour. Loki could sense the danger surrounding him. Thanos, it seemed, was biding his time. He had to find a way to escape and disappear; fast.

With a brief smile of relation, Loki turned to leave the hall, striding across to the doors, not sure where he was headed; only desperate to be out of Thanos' presence. He stopped abruptly as he got to the door, his fingers still gripping the frame. Thanos had called after him as he left. "Trickster. Before you retire, there is one last thing I wish you to see." Loki swallowed as he turned to look at Thanos, who had started towards the easterly door into the throne room and had beckoned him to follow. "Come, it shall only take a few moments." Loki let go of the frame mechanically, digging his fingers into his palms as he followed suit. He was growing tired of this dreary aura of respect and of playing disciple. He loathed following someone elses requests; for he was his own master, and more often than not, he did what he wanted and no one else. However, the situation with Thanos was decidedly more complicated. He had made a bargain with him, tied himself to him impossibly, and he had failed in his mission.

Thanos could have killed him, but chose rather to keep him close and recruit him instead. As much as he resented such a pact, in a twisted way, it made Loki feel finally appreciated. That finally someone saw him as a valuable asset, even if it was just to use for his own advantage. It was a better acknowledgment than he had received before. Shaking his head of his thoughts, Loki continued to follow Thanos' large form, as it pushed its way through the ornate corridors of the palace, the flickering candlelight causing him to have so great a shadow that it engulfed Loki in its entirety. Thanos finally stopped before a plain wooden door, as he turned to face Loki. Loki looked at him questioningly. "You have been invaluable in this great conquest of Asgard" Thanos declared, the corners of his mouth curling. "It is only right that you shall be rewarded in the short term as well as in the long."

Leaning forward, Thanos gripped the door handle in his large hand, and opened the door. The room behind it was pitch black, prohibiting anyone from seeing what lay inside it. Loki did not like it. "Enter, and you will receive what you seek." With a forced smile, Loki stepped reluctantly forward and through the threshold, knowing within himself that he was stepping willingly into a trap. In his mind, he cursed his actions; yet there was nothing else he could do. Even if he did turn and resist, Thanos was a giant, a weathered creature from an unknown realm whose palm alone was almost the size of Loki's head. He would likely be killed almost immediately if he tried to get past him. It would be better for him to comply, and stay alive, until he could formulate a plan. As he squinted in the darkness, Loki turned to look behind him at Thanos, who stood illuminated in the doorway by the light, like a ghastly deity. "You shall have what you long for. And I shall return. You are of use to me yet… Your Grace." Loki's stomach sank as Thanos smirked and heaved the door shut with an almighty bang, plunging the room into complete darkness.

He almost laughed out loud. _Of course Thanos had known. He had always known. This was always going to happen._ He sighed, raising a hand to rub the back of his neck. What was a mystery though, was what was in this room that Thanos so wanted him to see. There seemed to be no imminent torturous devices or beasts; contrary to what he might have expected. There seemed to be… nothing. And then, a searing bright light illuminated the room, so harshly that Loki instinctively shielded his eyes in pain. Removing his hands, he blinked, as his eyes adjusted to the new ambiance. When his vision finally began to come back to him, he tilted his head to examine his surroundings. The room seemed to be plain, with stone walls, and no furniture, save for a wooden bench. Still blinking, Loki took a step forward as he squinted at the figure that sat upon it, hunched inwards to the wall. It was a woman._ No…_ Loki's heart stopped, as the silent form of his mother turned to look at him.


	18. Mother & Child

**Helllo! Thankyou all again for reading, cant say enough about how great it is to know that people are enjoying it!  
Here is the latest chapter... I got major mother/son pheels when writing it so I hope y'all like it too! x**

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Both figures remained frozen in time, engulfed by the silence of the room, as they registered each others presence. The mother looked at her son, and the son looked at his mother; neither quite meeting each others eyes, but both speechless and devoid of any form of movement or communication. Loki did not know what to say, what to do; he was for all intents and purposes, paralysed beyond any form of control. He stared at the weary form of his mother, unable to express any kind of emotion; lost in the absolute shock of seeing her again after so long. He stole a glance at her face, the radiant face which he had known ever since he could remember, and saw it blighted by exhaustion.

Although everything about her remained the same; her beautiful gown and jewels still retained their regality and her hair still remained elegantly pinned in a quaint bun; he was able to read the map of her grievances through her expression. He felt himself drift as an emotion rose within him. For the first time since deciding his fate, Loki felt true shame. He hadn't met her eyes; the fear within him at such a prospect was overpowering; yet Loki suddenly became conscious of his appearance, for the first time in a long while. He had seen the reflection of his face, albeit briefly, and knew himself how different he looked from the way he had before. He knew he had become hollowed and wild, his hair unkempt and his eyes cold.

He knew he looked like a criminal; an evil creature from the darker realms that would surely strike nothing but dread and fear into those who looked upon him. He looked nothing like a Prince of Asgard, and nothing like the man whom had been her son. He began to doubt if Frigga had even recognised him at all. He looked down at himself, suddenly feeling a burning and painful desire to shed this disgraced image he now darned and regain his dignified and royal one, so that he may look upon her as the man she had known, as opposed to this weathered stranger who now stood before her. He stared at the floor, unable to speak. The atmosphere in the room was unbearable. Uncertainly, and remaining silent, Frigga stood up, her movements slow and tactile. She began to inch forward, approaching Loki as cautiously as one would approach a lion in the wild. As she came closer, she began to restrain, reaching out unsteady arms before her in apprehension.

Despite being very tall, Loki's posture had become so bowed that his face was within reach of Frigga's searching hands. It would have usually required her to be wearing high shoes, or be raised as high as possible on her tiptoes to come close to being at Loki's true eye level, and even then she was a couple of inches short. As Loki continued to look down, he noticed that she was barefoot. Yet somehow, whether it was due to their postures, or the setting, or the general rawness of the situation they were in, such obstacles were no longer present. Loki felt the lump in his throat and the lurch in his heart as Frigga came even closer. She reached up to gently touch the bottom of his chin with the tips of her fingers; as if searching for verification that it was really him; and not a projection or hallucination. Instinctively, and through no forced infliction of his own, Loki pulled away from her touch; turning away against his will.

He did not want her to look at him; some unknown and bitter part of himself could not bear to be in her very presence. His heart sped up as he realised that he had began to push her away already. _Her. _Frigga stared at Loki's back, tears forming in her eyes as her hands remained frozen in the air where his face had been. Loki fixated his eyes on the blank wall, every inch of him fighting to determine how he was going to act. He had chosen a new means of living, and it was without his 'family'. He could not simply pick and choose who he wanted himself to be anymore. His love for his mother sliced away inside of him, but he could not express it. He could not be who he once was; after all of his crimes and experiences, such a feat was impossible. Despite what he may or may not have wanted, Loki had to play the part he had chosen for himself. He could not show her what he truly felt. If he did so, it would prove him weak. The muscles in his face tightened as he willed himself to glaze over his heartbreak, as he so often did. Behind him, Frigga rescinded her hands, her face hurt. She was the first to speak, and was unable to stop the tears escaping down her cheeks as she did so.

"Loki.." she said softly, her voice wracked with emotion. "Can it truly be?" Loki said nothing, and remained with his back to her. "I hoped.. I dreamed.. about this moment..." Her shaky voice was interrupted by intermittent sniffs. Loki looked upwards to stem the tears that were threatening to form in his own eyes. In a surprise even to himself, the words that finally came out of his mouth were calm and cold; so much so that he almost felt as if his true self was not even present in his body as he uttered them, but rather overcome by an unknown force which spoke on his behalf. It had been a struggle, but he had been able to effectively quell his true feelings with Thor. He never thought he could be the same with his mother. It seemed his skills were more clearly defined than even he had realised. "If such was true, then you would have made haste to quicken our reunion whilst I was imprisoned here. Yet you did not." His voice was so cool and steady, that it frightened him.

Frigga blinked, trying in vain to keep the agony from her voice. "I came every day, for each of those seven days, Loki. As did your brother. I tried so hard to go through those doors; to see you with my own eyes once again. But I was not as strong as Thor. I was afraid. So afraid of what you had done and all that you must have experienced, and so ashamed that I could not protect you from it." She sniffed again, clasping her hands together in an attempt to mediate herself. "But I find now, having you here, that I have this strength within me. I cannot express my sorrow at what you have done Loki, nor hope to understand why you committed the violent acts that you did. And I cannot begin to fathom the reason that you would wish to destroy our home, but the fact remains; you are my son. And you are_ alive._" She looked at Loki with tears in her eyes, but his back was still turned. She reached out a hand, which lightly brushed the back of his shoulders.

"Loki, please. Let me look on you." Loki dug his fingers into his palms and squeezed his eyes shut, before turning around reluctantly to finally face Frigga properly. He saw immediately that Frigga could not contain the wave of shock that passed over her as she looked up onto his hardened face. Fresh tears formed in her eyes, as they scanned over his changed features. Frigga swallowed down the threat of sobs, as she reached up to gently take Loki's face in her hands. Seeing the agony in her eyes, Loki began to feel numb. He could not, at this moment, fend off her touch. Frigga ran her thumbs across his angular cheeks, ignoring her tears as she moved upwards, delicately brushing over the dark and bruise-like circles beneath his eyes with her fingertips. She looked to be in a greater state of misery than Loki had ever seen her. And then she registered his eyes. As she looked into them, her expression changed, from misery to horror. "What…" Her eyes had began to dry, replaced with innate concern. "Your… your eyes… They are not this colour… they are green, they have always been green..." Her voice began to grow slightly unhinged. "How was this done? To what did they subject you?!"

Finally regaining his senses, Loki shrugged Frigga's hands away, as he pulled himself from her grip and moved a few steps across the room. "They did nothing!" he snapped, far more aggressively than he had intended. "It is the knowledge of the Tesseract, and that is all." Frigga's eyes dimmed. "No… oh my child. My child.." She turned away reproachfully, massaging her hand, which, Loki noticed, bore a deep cut across its palm. A pang of guilt and anger crossed him as he saw it. He shook it away as he spoke. "Thanos has put me in here purposefully to suffer this." Frigga turned to look at him in disbelief. "But I will endure for as long as I must; and then I will make an escape." Frigga looked at him incredulously. "Escape?… What exactly does the Mad Titan wish to achieve in this attack with which you have assisted him?" Loki's hands remained clenched; he momentarily wished he had not left his sceptre in Odin's chambers; for if he had it, his escape could have been achieved far more easily, and he could have avoided this torture.

He sighed, the features of his face remaining as set as stone. "Thanos requires the Odinforce. He utilized me to get it. In the only method possible." Frigga's eyes widened in alarm. "Loki you could not.." "Oh fear not, the deed has not been done... yet." Frigga looked down sadly, but paused as her eyes met the cut on her hand. Her mind clicked. "So that is why they took my blood.." "Yes, and Thor's." replied Loki evenly. Her distraught face began to animate as she took a step towards him. "And yet… the Allfather is not yet dead…" "There was a timing issue. It will be solved tomorrow." Frigga's eyes grew hopeful. "Then in that case… why is it that you wish to flee? What is it that you fear?" Loki bit the inside of his cheeks. "I had intended to exact my power and rule what I was denied… but now... Now I simply wish to free myself from this realm. Let Thanos burn it if he so desires; but I shall be long departed when he does so." "Why do you talk like this? Why do you say things you do not mean? You may believe yourself to be a skilled withholder of the truth, Loki, but I am your mother; you cannot lie to me, despite what you may believe. And I am also the wife of the Allfather; I know what will truly kill him. I was there when it was first written."

She advanced towards Loki with a fragile cadence in her eyes. "I know why the blade did not work, and I know why you wish to escape when this reason is revealed." At this moment, Frigga shot out her arms impulsively and grabbed Loki's left hand, fighting with all of her strength to keep it within her own as she exposed the healing cut that ran across it. Loki yanked his hand away forcefully, but it was too late. She had already seen what she needed to see. Frigga's eyes grew sad once more as she looked at her son with indescribable compassion. "You knew he needed the blood of those he loves the most; of his family. And this serves as the greatest proof that you are as much a part of it as I, or Thor. You have his love, Loki, more than you can possibly know. And if this is discovered, you will be a necessary part of the extraction process. Your fear is perishing here, at that brutes hand, with the rest of us." Loki glanced at Frigga's passionate form, as he recognised the same pleading in her eyes he had seen so often in Thor. He could not understand why or how he consistently forced himself to reject it.

"You do not have to run, Loki. You can stay; and fight. You have ventured down the wrong path, and despite the wrongs you have committed and experienced, we love you, all of us, and we will never hesitate to welcome you home. You are ours, and we yours. We can make this right." Loki scoffed lightly as he spoke. "If only that were true in practice. It is not I to whom you should be speaking of this. Thor is at the perimeter of the city with his Midgardian allies. It should not take long for him to arrive here. Despite my better judgement, I have no doubts that they will make it to the palace. Their strength is not to be underestimated. When he arrives, talk to him of honour and righteousness. It is a feature found in his character, not mine. Your child will defend you well." Frigga's eyes began to fill once more. "And what of my other child? My youngest child? What will become of him? Will he simply break my heart, leave my home to ruin and rip himself from my life like he was never there?" Loki steeled himself as he felt his emotional shutters automatically begin to clamp down.

"Thor is your youngest child" he said coldly. "And he will be there." "DO NOT _DARE_." A hurt form of rage began to form behind Frigga's fragile countenance. "Loki, you are capable of as much honour and righteousness as your brother is. You are the sons of Odin. Both of our children are strong. Both of our children will save us, and Asgard. I know in my heart that this is the truth." Loki's heartbreak resurged with Frigga's words, as he retaliated, desperate to shake off her loving words that were making him feel; and worst of all; making him hope. He forced his eyes to be stern. He forced his composure to be rigid. He forced his voice to be plain. "He is not my brother" he said harshly. "And I am not your child." Frigga looked at him for a moment, her face a strange mixture of hurt, anger and strength. Loki regretted his words as he had said them, for she was not Thor; she did not have his strength; she was his mother, and it pained him deeply to hurt her as he no doubt had. But it had been a response that he had no control over manufacturing. He could do nothing to rescind it now. He waited, unsure of how she was going to react. Frigga remained still for a brief moment, the curious look still etched upon her face, before the air was fractured with her response, as she slapped Loki hard across the face.

* * *

Loki raised his hand instinctively to cover the section of his cheek where Frigga's slap had landed. As he looked over at her in shock, he saw her turn and make her way back in the direction of the bench, unable to prevent the sobs she had so greatly been repressing. She turned again to face him after a few steps, her eyes growing red from the intensity of her tears. She looked at him longingly, with such innocent and pure love in her eyes that it broke Loki's heart even more than it already was. Looking back at her and seeing her in such a vulnerable state; one that he had never before seen on her in his life; caused something in the machine of Loki's deceptive mind to break down. His anguish must have shown on his face, for at that moment, Frigga flew to close the distance between them, as she threw her arms open and wrapped them around her son as tightly as she possibly could. Loki was paralysed by the shock of her action, and the physical feeling of being held.

He had never been taken into the arms of anyone since his fall from Asgard's graces; not even Thor had attempted to cross such a barrier. A part of his mask must have slipped in the aftermath of his mothers angry outburst; a slip that revealed to her at least a portion of his true self. For Frigga held onto him as if she never wanted to let him go. In that instant, he ceased to be how he currently was, and instead became to her, a little child; her little child, whom she would scoop up in her arms and hold tightly whenever she needed reassurance. The little child who she would see so often standing at the threshold of her chambers in the late hours of the night, hand in hand with his brother, because they had seen a shadow in their own chambers that had frightened them. She would chuckle softly, and pull back her quilts, as her children raced to hop in beside her, snuggling into her and falling asleep within minutes. And there she would lie, stroking their hair until she herself fell asleep and awoke the next again morning. She remembered her grief; her sleepless nights believing that her son was gone forever. And now she finally held him in her arms again, and it was not a trick of her mind. It was real. She sobbed softly, as she buried her face in Loki's shoulder.

Slowly accustomising to her affection, Loki hesitantly allowed his own arms to hold her back. As he became more and more taken away with the intensity of the situation, he felt his own tears well in his eyes. He moved to whisper quietly into her hair as he felt his whole fortress of indifference collapse around him. "I-" "I know" Frigga cut in simply, with a teary smile, as she finally loosened her hold. She moved to sit once more on the bench, keeping Loki's hand in her own. He sat next to her. "You do not know how I have prayed for this" she said. Loki almost smiled. But he did not; instead opting to simply bow his head slightly in response. "Loki…" Frigga spoke again, this time her voice infused with thought. "You will not leave Asgard to fall… will you?" Loki looked over at her, betraying nothing. He looked down at their hands. "I do not know" he said frankly. "I do not know what I want any longer…" "But you cannot let your father die… I know you cannot want that…" Loki said nothing, only narrowed his eyes as a tinge of anger entered them in Odin's name.

He did not disregard the term used to connect them for Frigga's sake, but Loki could still not forget the anger he felt at Odin, and indeed Thor. He did not know how he could not feel it so strongly with his mother; with her, the rage was something which he had had to manufacture. With them, it was genuine. But he also could not ignore the love he still felt for them too. "I know he made mistakes Loki. But all the mistakes he made, he made out of love. You must see that.." "He rebuked me. Time and time again. Even as I hung over that void; he still could only speak words alluding to my failure; as both a king and as a son. I cannot see how a man who truly loved his child could utter such condemnations whilst their life was hanging in the balance.." Frigga saw Loki's face harden with the memory. "The Allfather does not say or do anything without reason, you know that. One day, perhaps, you will know the reason behind his actions. But until then, I implore you; please stay. Stay with us and save our home from this fiend." Loki looked over at her again.

"All of Asgard loathes me. I have seen it. I was an instrument in this conquest. The people alone do not want anything to do with me, never mind the warriors. I have no place here now. To remain here would only result in my own rejection, and that is something which I would rather avoid." Frigga gripped his hand tighter. "And what of Thor?" she said quietly, watching Loki's reaction with a knowing glint behind her eyes. He could never repress a reaction when it came to that name. Loki exhaled painfully, as he gently eased his hand out of hers, moving to clasp them in front of him. Frigga almost chuckled; it was a position that exactly mirrored that of her other child. "I do not waste time with concern for Thor. He is strong. He will likely succeed in any case. And he has his Midgardian allies, all of whom I am not on the friendliest of terms with. I am hardly needed." Frigga sighed sadly. "You do not realise just how much he needs you, Loki." Loki glanced at her questioningly, unable to keep his curiosity at bay. "He has never been the same since he lost you. He has been efficient in his battles, no doubt, but a part of him is broken. He feels no true happiness, he can experience no true victory. He misses you. And your hatred tortures him."

Frigga tilted her head to study Loki in a very typical motherly fashion. "Yet I can tell you, my son, that he will never give up in his quest to unite with you. He will fight for it until the ends of the Realms. He is not the arrogant and naïve man he once was. He has learned, from everything that has transpired, from experiencing your loss, that he did not fully appreciate what he had until he lost it. And now he seeks to make that right. I have seen such faith in his eyes for you, Loki. And he stands by it so staunchly that others simply cannot understand why. But I can." Loki lowered his eyes. "It is because the further you slip from him, the more he feels like half of him is fading. And he cannot bear it. For you were, and are, a part of him, Loki. As he is a part of you. He sees the good in you, the good that you so well hide, the good that I have seen here. He knows you are capable and worthy of so much more. If you just let him in, I believe that the two of you are exactly what each other needs. You are the only ones with the ability to truly heal each other." Loki remained silent, as Frigga reached out an arm to him.

He might have conceded to the emotional response he so felt within him, were it not for the deafening sound of the door to the room being unlocked from the other side. Loki shot up like a rocket, panic entering his eyes. He turned to Frigga as he heard the door beginning to open. "I am sorry. You shall be free of this place. I swear it." Frigga looked from Loki to the door, her eyes widening. Casting a look over his shoulder, Loki moved in front of her and gripped her shoulders tightly as he looked into her eyes. "We must remain composed." he said in a whisper. "I promise, you will be free of here as soon as is possible." He saw the worry form in her eyes, and he sought to quell it, despite the commitment he was proposing being so ironically against his nature. "Mother" he said firmly, looking at her with level eyes. "Trust me." Frigga could only manage half a nod, as Loki sped around to face the door as it finally swung open, his collected mask reassembling over the features of his face. Thanos stood grinning in the doorway as he looked at the austere forms of the Allmother and her estranged son.

"I trust the reunion was a pleasant one?" "Simply touching" retorted Loki, injecting fluid sarcasm into his tone as he stepped forward. "So dismissive, for a Prince to act towards his Queen" Thanos smirked. Loki gave an exaggerated sigh. "Right. You know who I am. I remember who I am. May I ask that we evade standing on needless ceremony here and execute the plan we both came to achieve? I know nothing has changed my mind as of yet." Thanos raised an eyebrow as he looked behind Loki at Frigga, who was fighting to evoke a more miserable expression. This was not too much of a difficult feat, considering it was in light of the ease with which her son could spin such a convincing lie and create such a convincing persona before her very eyes. A part of her even began to worry if what he had told her before was genuine. Despite this, she still played along. She had seen the sincerity in his face. She had to trust it. "Come then" said Thanos with a gesture of his hand, as he looked suspiciously between mother and son. "Gladly" evoked Loki with a perfect exasperation, as he swooped through the door past Thanos without a backwards glance. Thanos remained at the door for a moment, his expression plain, before heaving it closed.


	19. Sending A Message

**Finally got the time to upload this next part! Thankyou so much for reading and staying with the story, means so much!**  
**This chapter is a little bit shorter than some of the others but I hope its still okay!**  
**Hope you all like! x**

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Loki breathed in as he stood on the royal balcony, the shaky breeze blowing strands of hair across his face as he regarded the battleground below. He gripped his sceptre, with which he was now reunited, as he steeled himself in response to the gradually waning light outside._ In several hours, he will expect the deed done. _His mind raced._ How will I make an escape?_ He thought of his mother. He had to ensure that she would be freed before he fled. His eyes flashed as he heard the explosions from Iron Man's thrusters below, as they collided with the hoards of Chitauri, and evidently another alien species to which Loki had not been introduced. He placed a hand on the balcony wall, and gripped hard, as he observed the Avengers fighting together. _Comradeship._They fought well, he had to admit, but despite the effectiveness with which they worked together, he knew, in this instance, that they were far beyond their league.

He narrowed his eyes, as he watched the Black Widow take down two foes in the same movement. She incited such loathing and venom within him; brought out such a vicious side of his character; that even Loki, with all of his skills, could not control it. He despised her; and he feared her. For Loki had met no other; not on Asgard, nor anywhere else; that had reminded him so cruelly of himself. They were so alike in so many ways that it stirred something serrated within Loki's very being. She had been another lost soul; another victim of pain and abandonment; and another being whom had taken out such grievances through the acts of killing and deceit. She had his cunning; his selfishness; and walked before a trail of blood as long as the one he bore himself. Yet, she was redeemed. She had seen the true nature of her path and had turned from it. She had been forgiven; and she was healed. She had someone for whom she was fighting; a weakness, like Loki knew he himself shared, and she had repented in their name. And for this, Loki both hated and envied her. For she was, and had achieved, all that he believed he could not. When he looked upon her, he saw his own failure; he saw all that he could have, and yet was forbidden by his own fears. She was all that he had the potential to be; and all that he was too beyond salvation to become.

He cleared his throat as he tore his mind from her; sending his eyes searching over the masses for Thor. As he did so, Loki unconsciously removed his hand from the balcony and rested it on his gauntlet. He remembered the spells he had taken from the book. His eyes remained searching as his mind worked. He finally found Thor; as he beat upon a faceless creature with all the strength and power he could summon. As he finished this defeat, and sent his hammer colliding into another attacking foe behind him, Thor began to look around, in evident awareness of being observed. As he summoned Mjolnir back, he turned his eyes upwards towards the palace, where Loki stood. Their eyes locked. Another alien attempted to attack Thor from the side. He smashed his hammer into it, not taking his eyes away from his brother. Loki kept his face emotionless, as he proceeded to turn, and vanish back into the palace.

* * *

Loki was still gripping the silver casing of his gauntlet as he walked hurriedly into the main hall. There were Chitauri barricading the doors; in defence against any penetrations the Avengers might attempt. But they had neglected to defend the other entrances that Loki could remember. _The ivy door.._His mind was whirring. It would not be long until the battle reached beyond those doors; and he had to find a means to get his mother, and then himself, out before this occurred. He almost startled, as he heard a gleeful battle cry coming from outside. Curious, Loki summoned his magic to separate himself, so before him stood one of the many holographic clones he could so easily manufacture. Silently, he sent said clone through the walls of the palace, where he could see, through his eyes, the battle outside.

The battle cry had come from Thanos; currently engaged in an offensive upon the Hulk and Iron Man. Loki watched through his clone's eyes, as the Hulk lurched towards Thanos, who, with a wave of his hand, immobilized him in the air, before throwing him backwards into Iron Man, who had only his armour to thank if he did prove to come out alive. It was not enough to stop the Hulk permanently, but Thanos had a means to inhibit and disengage him. _Fascinating._He seemed to be enjoying himself; as Iron Man and Hulk, disorientated, charged at him again. He still had the slaying blade within his armour, which Loki could catch glimpses of when he moved. He knew this window of opportunity would be narrow. With a sharp jerk of his hand, Loki dissipated his clone, before striding past the Chitauri and into the adjoining room where he could not be seen. The Chitauri could be lethal; but they were nowhere near intelligent.

As he pulled the door shut, Loki inhaled deeply as he acknowledged what he was about to do. And to what it would seem, both to himself and to its subject. But the battle was raging on; and what little time Loki had, he had to use before it was too late. He couldn't waste time thinking about the repercussions of his action; he had to simply undertake it. He had to ensure his mother would be safe. He had to protect himself; and run. He had to send his message. And so, closing his eyes, Loki began to mutter under his breath, until one of the spells he had previously etched upon his gauntlet became visible. Hastily, he read the words, before conjuring a thin shard of metal in his hands. He focused his eyes and mind on the tip, as he willed it to heat up, until it glowed with an orange and yellow light. _Hot enough to mark._Exhaling slowly to calm his mind, Loki placed his sceptre against the wall to free his other arm, which he pressed solidly against the wall before him. Taking the shard of metal in his other, he focused his own eyes on the surface, and focused his mind on Thor's; in that instant on the balcony when they had locked with his.

Silently, he kept this picture in his mind as his magic worked, and his writing arm began to etch upon the surface of his gauntlet. _"She is being held in the dungeons. Second door. Remove her; take her to the tunnels that lead to the forest. From there she will find safety. In addition. The Chitauri are strong; but they are dim-witted. The ivy door._" He released the concentration from his mind, as he looked at his gauntlet; the words he had written illuminated by white light. With a repressed sigh, Loki proceeded to etch beneath his words the rune which was the symbol of Thor. The remainder of his gauntlet took up a blinding orange glow, which Loki covered quickly with his cape to block out. The light grew brighter beneath the material; and grew hotter and hotter, causing Loki to stifle a gasp of pain, as the heated metal burned his skin, before the glow left; taking his words with it and leaving his metal gauntlet as plain as it had been before. Setting his jaw, Loki straightened up, before taking up his sceptre once more and opening the door back to the battle.


	20. Message Recieved

**Another relatively short chapter, some bits I'm not really 100% happy with but I've tweaked them as best as I could so hope you enjoy!x**

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"Retreat to the square!" Thor heard the distant cries of Captain America as he fought his way through the army of Chitauri surrounding the palace. _"Retreat!"_ Thor gritted his teeth as he swung his hammer at an oncoming Chitauri, before complying, as he flew up and across the battling masses, grabbing the startled Captain as he went. As they both landed roughly behind the smoking buildings, they noticed Natasha and Clint taking cover behind a fallen wall, followed not a moment later, by the jerky arrival of Iron Man, who held the unconscious, and reverted, form of Bruce in his arms. His armour was badly damaged, causing him to stumble as he released Bruce onto the ground.

As the Avengers all looked at each other, they recognized the need for a temporary place to take refuge. A place to re-work their plans. They heard the grunts of their enemies in the distance, as Captain America pointed behind them. "That tower there!" he proclaimed hoarsely, as the smoke in the air became more predominant. "You heard the man. Lets go!" shouted Clint, as the six heroes made a run for the entrance to the tower that stood on the perimeter of the square. Only Thor began to slow down as he reached the entrance, looking up at the tower with widened eyes. _The Jirnar._"Thor come on!" cried Natasha urgently. Tearing his eyes away, Thor followed her through the entrance to the half-destroyed building, as the Captain and Iron Man barricaded it behind him.

The space inside was dark and dusty; which was soon rectified by the light from Iron Man's helmet, which allowed them to gather some debris to kindle a fire. Thor moved beyond them; to where he knew the spiralling staircase began. He pushed open the door, letting the light stream in, gaining irritated glances from the Captain and Clint upon doing so. Looking up, he saw that the top half of the staircase had been blown open, so he could see the sky clear above him. His nostalgic heart was a weight in his chest. He turned to face the others, who had began to slowly but surely provide the small space inside with a decent amount of light. Seeing their faces plainly in objection to the exposed roof, he stepped back through, closing the door behind him so that the only light that remained was that which the others had created.

There were no windows in the room to barricade; so they were not in any immediate danger of attracting attention. They would only need a couple of hours to plan a strategy to get them to the palace. They all sank to the ground in exhaustion. Iron Man removed his helmet to become Tony Stark again, as did the Captain become Steve, as they watched over the still cataleptic form of Bruce. Clint and Natasha sat with their backs against the wall; not saying a word to each other, but at the same time, saying everything they needed to say. Thor remained standing up as he watched them quietly, feeling an acute sense of loneliness possess him as he observed his teammates take comfort in each other. Steve finally spoke up wearily. "We need to find a better way to make an advance. Weve been fighting at stalemate for the last two hours." The others nodded solemnly in reply.

"But how are we supposed to do that Cap? Theres hoards of them out there. And this time, we don't have a nuke on hand to cut them off at the source" replied Clint gravely. The team exchanged conclusive glances as they proceeded to contemplate their quandary in silence. The atmosphere remained like this for several minutes, until it was broken suddenly by a cry of pain from Thor. The other Avengers shot up like rockets, as the Asgardian doubled over, grabbing at the metal gauntlet on his arm that formed a part of his armour. Gritting his teeth in pain, Thor tried in vain to rip the metal from his skin, but it would not budge. Natasha came forward, as she tried her hand to remove it, only to curse and wrench her hand away as she was burned by its poker hot surface. Thor exhaled deeply, attempting to ignore the excruciating pain of the burning. The others, unsure of what to do or what was happening, remained still. "What could be doing this Thor? Thanos?"

Grimacing, Thor held out his arm before him, as he observed the orange heated glow from his gauntlet begin to die down. He looked at its gleaming surface with a frown, as he observed white words beginning to appear below Loki's symbol; which he had engraved on his gauntlets after he had lost him; and had worn ever since. His eyes widened as he read the text, stupefied by its nature._ "She is being held in the dungeons. Second door. Remove her from here; take her to the tunnels that lead to the forest. From there she will be guided to safety. In addition. The Chitauri are strong; but they are dim-witted. The ivy door."_The others came over carefully to share in his confusion. Thor continued to stare at the words speechlessly for a long while, even after the others had returned to their previous places. He maintained this until the white etching finally melted away with a final flash of pain, before it disappeared entirely and his gauntlets returned to normal. His fellow Avengers regarded him questioningly.

"Someone is trying… to help us?" asked Tony aloud in disbelief. "Didn't seem like it was 'us' per say" interjected Steve. "Sounded like it was addressed to just Thor." "But still, it's a tip off about the palace defenses " said Tony, irritated. "And whoever was able to send you a message, with our friend crazy grape-face on the prowl, has got to have some form of magic." "Or, it could be Thanos himself doing it, and he could be setting up a trap" offered Clint. "Maybe its just a trick of the mind from the smoke .." From this point, the Avengers proceeded to engage in their typical 'heated discussions'; each of them offering different possibilities and disagreeing with the other until tensions in the room had escalated to high school-esque proportions. This noise around him drilled into Thor's confused mind as he tried to process the meaning of the message. _What are you doing?_Gradually, the chatter of disagreements became too much for Thor, as he finally interrupted, his voice so firm that all the others halted as he spoke.

"It was not Thanos. And it was not a trick of the mind." The others looked at him in concern. Thor looked down at his gauntlet again. "It was Loki" he said quietly. "Bullshit" hit back Tony almost immediately. The others looked from Tony to Thor in agreement, their eyes heavy with suspicion. "Why the hell would he want to help us? Or better yet, _you_?" Thor looked at him evenly, quelling the confusion he felt at his brothers sudden act of reaching out. "I know not, but it is most definitely him. It cannot be anyone else…" Steve regarded Thor with sadness in his eyes. "I'm sorry Thor but… don't you think that you're only seeing what you want to see here?" Thor glanced at him stonily. "No. You may maintain your suspicions, but my brother is the one who sent that message. It is clear; who else would know about the ivy covered door we used to use to sneak into the palace?" The others looked at Thor worriedly as a tinge of hope entered his eyes. "He wishes me to escort our mother to safety. He is _worried_. Do you not know what this may mean?" Steve and Tony exchanged troubled glances.

"Look, if we take this in a professional way; we've been offered a means to create a plan with this new information - if it is real and not a trick to get us captured-" Tony broke off as he saw the vehement denial of this in Thor's face. "- but it is Loki we're talking about here. We cant trust him. But we can try and build something around this. He mentioned the Chitauri had no brains. So in other words, Thanos is the only one with the intel to get past." Steve's eyes began to formulate as he stepped in. "So, we need a distraction. We need to fight these goons and keep Thanos' attention on us while one of us goes through that secret door. Thor, you know where it is, and you've got the lightning if it does turn out to be a trap. If we play our cards right, we can get you to your mother, and father, before Thanos unveils whatever power it is he hopes to use." The other Avengers nodded contentedly, as Tony spoke again, directing his words to Thor.

"But look, big fella… just don't get your hopes up too much. Loki is probably doing this to save his own hide. This doesn't mean he's suddenly Ghandi." Thor looked at him reproachfully. "You can choose to believe that if you wish, but I know the truth of why he sent me that message." "Come on, Thor, how can you be so powerful and still be so _naïve_? If you go in there believing this, then you are setting yourself up for a fall. He will let you down, and he will hurt you. Again." Thor lowered his eyes. Tony took a step forward, his posture softening, in as uncharacteristic a move as he had ever exhibited. "Look… I'm not pretending to be Father Wisdom here but… giving up doesn't always mean you're weak. Sometimes it can just mean that you've become so tired of trying, that you've learned to make yourself strong enough to let go. To let yourself move on. This isn't healthy. You should leave the pain behind you and start again. You don't need to carry it with you!" Thor looked over at Tony, as Steve looked at Thor, knowing full well that this was something he could never do.

Thor picked up Mjolnir from where he had dropped it on the ground, as he replied. "That may very well be, Stark. Perhaps I am a fool for believing in Loki. Perhaps you are right. But my question will be, if I do find this strength, if I do 'move on' as you say… Who will love him? Who will be left to fight for him?" An expression of thoughtful confusion possessed Tony's face as Thor spoke. "I may try and fail for the rest of my life to heal someone who does not wish to be healed; to care for someone who does not want to be cared for; and to love someone who does not wish to be loved; and, eventually, this doomed effort may be the death of me. But I will have died fighting for something that I truly believed to be worth fighting for. The only true failure I will ever suffer; the only time I will ever prove myself to be truly weak; will be the day I stop trying." The Avengers remained silent in the wake of Thor's words, as he strode towards the door, turning towards Steve, evidently in no mood to dispute what he had just lain down before them.

"Captain. We will proceed with the plan as you suggested. The Chitauri may be brainless; but I know no detail of their alien accomplices. Go forth with care; and I will enter the palace to release my mother and awaken my father. For he is no doubt in the Sleep, for him to have allowed this conquest to occur." Steve nodded curtly. "You need only hold them for a short while and then we will rejoin you." "We'll try and keep Thanos occupied too, but there are no promises there, what with him having deflated his favourite" Steve gestured to the still out-cold Bruce on the floor. "He is safest to be left here. If he does wake, and if he does come under threat, he has the Hulk at his disposal."

Steve reached out an arm to Thor, and they clasped them together; a battle-worn version of a handshake that they had taken to doing as of late. Thor nodded to the others, and to Tony, who had said nothing since his dissuasive declaration. "Good luck. For everything" said Steve lowly to Thor as he stepped through the threshold. "And you" Thor replied, looking back, first at Steve, and then at the Avengers. "We will meet again soon, my friends." And with that, Thor was gone from the door in a flash; having shot across into the tangle of buildings. He could not fly, as would be the easiest, for fear of giving himself away. It would have to be a concealed journey; on foot. Meanwhile, as Steve turned to the remaining Avengers, he registered the concern and puzzlement in their faces. "Thor knows what he believes in. We cant change that. But believe me on this; we can take these bastards. Get ready; we attack in an hour."


	21. A Child of Two Worlds

**Hello! Thankyou again for the reviews and reading! I started writing this and couldnt stop; I'm up in 5 hours! D:  
I should say for this next chapter; the bit with Thanos telling Loki's origin is an idea that I divulged on; it was an idea I took and went with considering that, other than Laufey being his blood father and him being a bastard (in the Movieverse) nothing else is said about his origins (i.e. his blood mother) so I went with my own theory that I have (in that Loki is a hybrid)  
So I hope you dont mind a little bit of elaboration and that you enjoy!x**

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Loki leveled his eyes as he stepped back out into the main foyer of the palace, where the Chitauri guards still waited. For a long while he stood vacantly, his sceptre in one hand, until the offensive upon the palace doors finally began. Exhaling deeply, Loki wondered if Thor had received and understood his message. _Foolish_. He watched the Chitauri's grim faces turn to defend their position, and prepared himself to attack. As the doors finally gave way, a mass onslaught of bodies charged; attempting to break through into the palace. The Chitauri held them off well. Yet, the Avengers were not yet this far forward upon the palace. Loki noticed a few familiar faces amongst those laying siege; somewhere in the back, the Warriors Three and Sif had evidently been released, and he recognized the additional scores of warriors from Vanaheim and Alfheim.

_Thor._ If this was all his doing, than he had severely underestimated his adeptness. _Although I was the one who sent him to the forests to hand her over to said allies._ Loki shook his head of his thoughts, as he was set upon by two warriors, whom he fought hand-to-hand, aggressively and brutally; gaining a burst lip and several cuts on his face from one of their daggers, before he tapped into his skill; tricking them with an illusion of himself and skewering them both with his sceptre. Loki's already damaged face was sprayed with specks of the dead warriors blood, as he pulled his sceptre out of his perpetrators chest. Before he could turn it in his hand, he was set upon by yet another assailant, and this time, the kill was on a much more personal level. Drawing on his speed of mind and movement, Loki burled as the heavy set and unknown warrior charged at him with his axe, tripping him with his feet, before flipping him over and plunging one of his throwing daggers into his heart. Loki leaned with all of his weight over the pool of blood on the mans chest as he twisted it in order to pull the blade out. In doing so, Loki's hands became literally scarlet with blood. He threw the dagger on the ground expressionlessly as he took up his sceptre again, which was now a quarter stained with red.

The battle raged far beyond the doors, and the true scope of it was something which would surely never be forgotten. Yet another legendary battle to which Loki's name would forever be attached... He spat out the blood that had been gathering in his mouth and wiped his hands aggressively on the sides of his leather battle clothes, before Thanos suddenly materialized at his side, looking not a fraction less intact than he had last seen him. "The sunset is a mere hour from now. We must make haste to the Allfather's chamber. The Chitauri can hold off these flies." Loki glanced briefly over to the still oncoming barrage before sweeping through the second set of heavy doors, which Thanos barricaded shut behind them. Loki gritted his teeth as they stormed through the palace halls. He gripped his gauntlet again, blinking several times as he recited another incantation in his head. It was a risk, and he was not sure if it would prove to be useful; but he needed it. Finally, Loki and Thanos arrived in Odin's chambers, as Thanos pulled the blade out from within his armour once more. He was going to expect Loki to kill Odin soon. He was going to expect the Odinforce to become his weapon, and as such put an ultimate end to the great battle outside. _Where are you?_ Loki thought vehemently, as he stared up at the grandly grated upper level of Odin's quarters. He and Thor had hid there to spy on him many times in their youth. _He must still be within the palace._

Thanos regared Loki with a dark gaze, as he retained the knife in his hands. "Tell me, Trickster" he finally said, pacing noiselessly around Odin's bed. "Do you know the root of all weakness?" Loki did not like the direction of this conversation. He merely looked back at Thanos blankly, before replying in a calm voice. "I believe there are many roots of such a tree, Titan." Thanos smirked. "Yes… yet one is most prevalent of all." Loki raised his eyes as he evoked his humouring of Thanos' words. Thanos turned the blade over in his hands, as he looked at it as a lover would to their betrothed, before raising his head slowly to meet Loki's eyes. "_Doubt._" His voice was suddenly cold and plain, with no sly taunting behind it. The game of make believe between them was, as it would seem, at an end. Loki masked his fear well, as he maintained an incredulous look in Thanos' direction. "In that case, I should be glad I suffer from no such infliction." Thanos laughed amusedly; an awful, hoarse roar that almost pried the gold from the very walls. "Trickster, you do not merely suffer this infliction, you _are_ this infliction. In every atom of your dismal being it resides; as a crippling deformity. I have told you of it before. I rid you of its influence, yet such a feat simply served to prove to me how pathetically subject you really are to its mercy." Loki fought to keep his face hard, as Thanos advanced towards him.

"You believe yourself to be masking it well. Yet I am no fool." Thanos tucked the blade back into his armour for the time being, although it was evident that it would not be remaining there for long. "I pity you. The bond forged with your brother, the blasted God of Thunder, is one which will forever prevent you from true glory." Loki's eyes began to glisten. "Surely you do see, that you will never be free of his shadow? He will forever hold power over you, wretched one. He will forever be inhibiting you from greatness with his own. You are damned to be tied to him as a weed that grows beneath a flower. And you cannot even fight it. For the binding I wove upon you was clad in iron; there was no manner by which it could be undone. It was irreversible. Yet your pitiful mind was so _weak_ that it did not even have the fortitude to defend itself from his invasion" Loki's free hand curled into a fist; while the one holding his sceptre gripped so hard that his knuckles began to turn white. "I knew all of this, Trickster, as you yourself knew I did all along. I suppose I was curious as to see whether you truly were able to rise to greatness; to rid yourself of your laughable condition. Yet evidently, I overestimated you. Truth speaks, I see, that the Aesir cannot be pried from their petty emotions. They will always bear their code of righteousness upon them. It is a true shame, for you are unique. So much potential, yet so little strength."

"And yet, I am not Aesir. And as such, I am far from righteous. And your defining of my characteristics are, in turn, riddled with error." Loki finally managed to speak, unable to shake the unstable tone of his voice as he did so. It was the first time he had ever disregarded himself from Asgard. Thanos studied him, before he turned to the side, seemingly content in something which amused him, and was unbeknownst to Loki. He finally gave a low, throaty laugh as he turned back to face him, clearly entertained by his previous statement. "Oh how little you know, Trickster, how little you know." Loki looked at him, an almost child-like ignorance veiling his still blood-stained face. Thanos moved brashly to sit next to Odin's bed, eying him with a cocky and malevolent air. "What is it then, pray tell, that he would have you believe?" Loki glanced from Odin's sleeping form to Thanos' weathered face. He spoke his words painfully, as if it were a physical torture to actually vocalise them out loud. "I know that I am Jotun. That the blood of those monsters boils within me. That I was not only this, but a runt bastard; outcasted, even by a society of_ brutes._ I know that I exist only to bring death and destruction. For when has there ever been tales of a noble Jotun? Never, for they are barbarians. It was only a matter of time. I was in the dark; and so darkness I became. There is nothing more to say." Thanos raised an eyebrow, in clear pleasure.

* * *

"One of the cleverest minds in the Nine Realms. And you take such an assumption as merit. I must say I am disappointed. If you were to look into anything in your despair, Trickster, I would have thought it would have been the true circumstances of your birth." Loki looked at Thanos with a panicked uncertainty rising within him. Thanos looked at Odin. "The ancients say the Allfather knows all. And yet he elaborates on so little. Such as it gets to the point where, it is his sworn enemy that is the bringer of the truth to his own beloved." A part of Loki balked at Thanos' last word. _He knows._ His eyes flicked to where the blade was concealed for a moment, before returning to Thanos' face as he turned from Odin. "You are Jotun, that is true. You were born upon the ice planet, and when touched by that which is significant to its land, you will adapt their appearance. When you first came into existence, you assumed such. Even as a babe, you were, for all intents and purposes, a survivor." Loki blinked. "Yet for you to believe that you are simply another one of those dim brutes is a folly on your own behalf. You have evidently never applied plain logic to the information before you." Thanos smirked.

"I ask you; in all previous cases; in all of the history of the Nine Realms, which you will, in your intellectual capacity, have absorbed, when has there ever been born a true Frost Giant that shared the size of an Aesir?" Loki's eyes twitched as his mind began to reflect. Thanos looked again at Odin as he spoke. "It is well established how great the height is of the Jotuns. Far greater than even I. And as such, even their runts; those who are born small; are just below the size of an average adult Aesir upon birth. So, by logic, if you were as you believe, then you should have fitted this model when you were born. Yet we both know you did not. You were the size of an Aesir, or indeed, a human, child. You could be picked up and held. And upon touch from the Allfather's hand, you assumed the appearance of them in addition." Loki looked up as he replied. "It was the Allfather's magic that allowed this." Thanos laughed. "O such compliments you give the old man! Please, it was not so much any influence from Odin than it was your own self. If the form you bear now is all just an illusion of magic, then I could strip it away right now here as we stand. As could you. I ask of you now. Try." Loki looked at him blankly before turning his gaze down to himself; vainly applying all of his glamour dispersion spells he could summon. He held out his hand, and saw that he remained as he had before. Thanos' mouth curled into a crooked smile.

"I can say with confidence, that were you a simple Frost Giant, no matter or strength of magic could hide your true visage for longer than a few days. Not only this, but you need only observe your own reflection. The possession of aesthetically pleasing features is an Aesir trait, not a Jotun trait. A Jotun could never surpass as an Aesir for so long, no matter how talented. Nor, indeed, could a Jotun master magic, or be as intellectually qualified as you unquestionably are. All of these factors, and you have never even taken them into consideration?" Thanos scoffed. "As I said before; _disappointing._" Loki could no longer keep the almost frantic confusion from his face. "But… it must be… I assume the form of a Jotun when I-" "Touch anything significant to Jotunheim, yes. I did not absolve you completely of this heritage. Laufey _was_ your blood father. How else are you expected to survive its conditions? As long as you retain your hold on such devices; objects; Jotun's themselves; you will be, effectively, immune to the effects of the brutality of the Jotun climate. Yet, outside of that, you are vulnerable to its effects as any other. Your breath clouds in the icy air. Yet, as I said, you are a survivor. There could be a slight extension if you truly asserted yourself; you have many talents. It is the reason I lament you proving to be so weak of mind." Loki's head was spinning as he spoke.

"If I am not a true Frost Giant than what am I?" He seemed to ask that question all too often. Thanos gave him an amused glare. "I would have thought that much would have been obvious. You are a member of a fascinating blend, dark one. Part Jotun, part Aesir. As are Odin here-" Thanos gestured to Odin's bed with a careless wave of his arm. "- and even perfect Asgardian warrior Thor. For he is no more the Allmother's blood child than you are." Loki frowned, quelling his shock and disbelief. "They cannot adopt the Jotun form, however, it lies dormant; for it was their mothers that were of Jotunheim. The gene is strongest with the father, and as such, you can adapt it when you come into contact with that which this part of you reacts." Loki gradually brought his head up to face Thanos as he finally asked his question. "Then my blood mother was-" "An Aesir" cut in Thanos impatiently. "Not just any Aesir, you see; she was one of the rarity amongst such race. A commander of magic. Something which the greater population did not, and still do not, truly understand." Loki's face was white with shock beneath the smears of blood.

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"What? You do not truly think your unequivocal magical talents and intelligence came from the Jotuns do you? Foolish child." Loki lowered his eyes again. "Your blood mother was a sorceress. Yet she grew to be afraid of her talents. Not for any other reason than she did not truly understand them; and nor did she believe her people would. It has been rumoured that she was of some relation to the Allmother, although such has never been confirmed. What is known, is that she frequented the palace court, as the Allmother's close confidant, and showered love upon the babe prince she sometimes watched over there. It has been rumoured that she was not only a sorceress, but a seer; and could see the future and fate of the child when she looked upon his face. And when she did, it was said that she saw in his future, another child, a kin, whom he would love above and beyond his own life. Although, she did not see how the Allmother could produce such." Thanos face twisted as he made clear his repugnance of this detail before moving on.

"Putting such deviations aside, this woman longed to explore other realms; and, to satisfy her curiosity, she decided to do such, and was able to veil herself from the Gatekeeper. A trait that you evidently inherited." Thanos smirked again as he went on. "She traveled through the portal, not knowing where she would emerge. And when she did, it was upon Jotunheim that she walked." Loki's throat grew dry. "She was terrified; she had heard terrible tales of the monsters that roamed there; and yet she was overcome by insatiable curiosity. She wandered the wilds, before she was captured by Jotun patrols and brought before Laufey. As she was thrown down before him; he proclaimed that she would be kept prisoner within his walls; for trespassing was not something that was taken lightly in Jotunheim. Yet, he believed this Aesir woman to be beautiful, and as such believed killing her in the usual Jotun practice would be a waste. His thuggish impulses possessed him; and though he was already betrothed to a fellow Jotun; he sought to satisfy his desire." Loki's fists still gripped hard, as his eyes involuntarily widened in horror as the story progressed. "

He stole to her prison cell where, starved upon Jotun food so that her beauty had been blighted and hollowed, his base instincts told him she was a sorceress. He demanded that she work her enchantments to allow him to descend to her size. Threatened with death, the woman obliged. And no sooner than she did so, he took her." Loki's heart throbbed in his chest. "And in that prison cell he left her, as he returned to his usual stature and to his court, alone again to dwell in negligence. But, she had become with child. Her cell door was guarded day and night by watchmen, and there was none with whom she could confide. Her magic was drained. She cursed ever having left her home. But she retained a higher intelligence than any Jotun could hope to achieve. She was delivered food once a day, and on this day when her door opened, she resolved, for the sake of herself and her unborn child, to escape. She had no magic left within her, yet when she summoned it when the door opened, she felt a sudden strength from within her; as if the child in her womb possessed all that she had possessed and more. She was able to channel it, and disengage the watchmen.

She moved as fast as she could for a woman in such a heavy condition, and stole through the barren corridors. It was just as she reached the outer door, that Laufey found her. Seeing her condition, he was repulsed and outraged; and cursed not having disposed of her sooner. He gave chase to her with his army of warriors, and she ran, hope running far out as her legs could carry her no further. Yet again, the power of her unborn child strengthened her, as she escaped to the caverns of the mountains where she could not be found. It was there, that she gave birth, alone, and weak, in the harsh winter blizzard. She saw her babe take on the form it needed, and knew that he had a chance to survive, although she certainly would not. She exited her cavern some days later, and saw the attack of her people upon the Jotuns. She knew she would never return home; but she vowed that her child would. She traveled through the icy winds and snow, her life fading around her. Determined, she reached the sieged court of the Jotuns and forced herself along to the temple where they kept their most precious artefact.

"The Casket" said Loki quietly. "Indeed. Here, she knew that the Allfather would come; seeking to seize his relic. And it was here, she knew, that her child would be found. In her dying actions, she placed her child next to it, praying that this wonder, the combination of two races with magic far greater than her own, would be taken to the home in which he belonged and deserved. She stole away into the shadows, but not before glancing back as she heard a warrior enter the temple. She saw the Allfather enter; and pick up the child. She witnessed the instantaneous love in his eyes; and it became clear to her, the significance of this child of hers; how irrevocably he would be loved, not only by the other child that she had doted upon, but by the rulers of her kingdom. She prayed for hope; she prayed for his soul; and she prayed for an end. And as the Allfather left the temple with the child, so it finally came to her."

Thanos finished with an almost monotonous flourish, as tears threatened to form in Loki's eyes. Thanos laughed. "You see now, how sentimental your origin was. You are not to be defined by any race or parent, dark one. You are a force unto yourself. You have had the powers to inflict destruction, and indeed you have. Yet, surely now, you understand, how I have always known what you are. And as such, I know how extract the Odinforce." He pulled out the blade. "I need your blood. All of it; for it is the most vital ingredient in this concoction." Loki gritted his teeth. "But fear not. The end is not yet nigh. For I do not like to be disappointed. And I do not intend for your end to be so clean as to be simply by the blade of a knife." Loki swallowed hard, as he looked up again to the grates above Odin's chamber; just in time to see the battle-beaten face of Thor appear behind them.


	22. As Sweet As Pain

__**Hello! Sorry its took so long to update, life has been a bit of a bitch lately. As well as the close running deadlines for uni work, my grandad also passed away so as you can imagine, October has been a ****_very _****topsy-turvy month. Emotionally and literally. But I finally managed to write a bit more tonight, it was hard to find the motivation but I got there in the end! I hope its not been too affected by the stuff thats been on my mind and that you guys can still enjoy it! Cause it means so much that people are liking it, cant thank you enough again for the reads and reviews! I dont know when I will next be able to update, got quite a lot coming up this week, but I will try and get writing and updating as soon as I can! Hope you enjoy x**

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_Stay still. Do not move._ Loki willed, hoping that, for once, Thor would think with his head and remain concealed, instead of charging forward into the fray as was his custom. He stole another glance at him as Thanos turned, putting all that he had into conveying this desire without speaking aloud. The urgency he could just make out in Thor's face told him that his brother was itching to engage Thanos and come to his aid. But concentrated behind Loki's eyes was a serious order; this, Thor had to let him handle himself. It was his own decisions and actions that had led him here; he had plunged himself into this pit, it held true that he should be the one to pull himself out of it.

Looking down at Loki, Thor recognized his look of determination; the look that told him that if Thor did not respect his desire, then his brothers view of him would fall even further. It took everything, and went against every natural impulse that Thor had to remain still, but he did. Below, Loki flicked his eyes back to Thanos, who had turned, leaning against Odin's bedpost. _He listened._ Loki could quite barely believe Thor's compliance, as Thanos began to speak. "You were told that you would truly know pain, should you disappoint me." Loki maintained level eyes as Thanos moved on. "And disappoint me you have, in every way imaginable."

Thanos pushed himself lightly off of the bedpost, as he began to make his heavy-footed way to the door. "There are many tortures I could concoct to cause you suffering, Trickster. When you first came to me, a select of such practices was tested. This, I know you remember." Loki gripped the sceptre in his hand as flashes of such memories stabbed his mind. _The Prison. The shackles. The isolation._ "Yes" drawled Thanos with a smile "You were the experiment of the Tesseract. Through you we truly saw the physical implications the force could inflict. And yet with it you gained such sight. You understood true power, albeit at the cost of your sanity." Loki's jaw was clenched. Above, Thor gripped the grating as hard as he could to restrain the rage that rose inside him. Thanos laughed.

"You carry the tool of your torture with you, and yet, as I have surmised, physical endurance is not an issue you bear." The blue gem in Loki's spear began to glow a little brighter as he spoke. "I knew from the instant I saw you that corporeal torture would only go so far. That pain, you can manage. With you, Trickster, it is all in the mind." Thanos smirked as he opened the door, allowing one of the strange race of creature that Loki had seen before in the palace, but not recognized, to come through.

It stood silent, a faceless hole where its facial features should have been, and long, slender arms draped at its side. It looked horrifying. Loki's eyebrows raised in apprehension, as he took an unintended step backwards. Thanos stood behind the creature, his eyes seeping with hunger. "It occurs to me that you have not been properly introduced. This is Dravak. A rather revered member of the Bython race. Not many remain. But Dravak has a very special talent." Thanos smirked as the creature began to slowly extend its arms. "The power to visualize demons." Thanos' voice became dark, calling him by name for the first time since they had met. "Tell me, Loki. What is your greatest fear?"

* * *

Loki swallowed hard as the creature advanced towards him, fighting the urge to glance up at Thor. Its spindly arms extended further and further, as long serrated fingers began to protract, reaching towards him. _Do not interfere._ The creature's claws came closer and closer, before Loki's resolve was abandoned, as he summoned his magic to dematerialize. However, as he moved to do so, he was seized once more by the power of the Tesseract. He felt his power drain away as his legs gave way beneath him, the gem in his sceptre glowing brighter than ever.

Thanos smirked again. He may have cast aside the Tesseract for pursuit of a greater power, but it was still of use to him yet. "Surely you did not think escape would be so easy?" came Thanos' disembodied voice as Loki's vision blurred. "My power over you has been cast in stone since the day you struck my bargain. You tied yourself to me, and such ties cannot be severed. Should you have tried, death would have awaited you. Now, you will know worse." Loki's head dropped as he pushed himself onto one knee in a move to pull himself up. But before he could, the searching claws found him, their sharp spikes grasping his hair and pulling his head backwards.

Above, Thor could watch no more. Grinding his teeth in anger, he tore himself from the grating as he made his way briskly, but silently, to Odin's chambers. There were many a secret passage used before his time that led out from that room. He could use one to gain access. Loki's eyes lolled in his head as Dravak held him fast, the faceless hole boring into his soul. His sceptre fell from his hand, as the creature drew back, extending a slender spiked finger towards the centre of his forehead. It finally spoke, in a voice so cragged and demonic that it instilled a chill within Loki right down to his very core. The claw began to pierce the skin. "Let us see your nightmares."

Thor finally reached a crack in the wall of the passage he had been following. Here, he could see, was an entrance to Odin's room. He guessed that the opening he was behind was roughly a few feet to the left of his fathers bed. He slowly pushed to open the crack further, as quietly as he could, before he could see his brother in plain sight before him. Crucially, neither Thanos, not the creature before him had detected his presence yet. Loki knew he was here. He did not know he had moved, but he knew he was watching._ I must get to him._ Casting his eye down to Mjolnir for a brief moment, Thor's attention was catapulted back to the bedchamber as the sound of a blood-curtling shriek of terror found his ears.

Thor's eyes widened in absolute horror as he saw the strange creature drawing away, to reveal the form of his brother, who was gripping the sides of his head with both hands, screaming hysterically. Thor's immediate reaction was to attack, yet something within him spoke with a voice that told him to think tactically. _What use will revealing yourself now be? Loki wished to face this himself. Let him try. You owe him that respect at least._ Thor exhaled deeply, his hand gripping his hammer as tightly as it possibly could in response to his anxiety. He wanted to protect his little brother. A perfectly natural and instinctive reaction, for one of any species or realm. _Not yet. Think like he would._ Thor's entire body was tense as he moved as close to the opening as possible, enabling him to have a full view of the room on the other side. Mjolnir was glued to his hand like a stalagmite. If it got too far, he was ready to charge.

* * *

Loki's screams reverberated around the hall, and died as he fell forward onto his elbows, his head still in his hands. "No" he was murmuring agonizingly "No, no, no…" Dravak had withdrew to Thanos' side. "I have done as you required. His greatest fear now rests at the forefront of his mind. Upon my leave, his horrors will be visualized " Thanos' mouth curled as he bowed his head. Dravak disappeared in a cloud of black smoke. No sooner than he had done so, the air in the room begin to tremble. Both Thanos, and unbeknownst to him, Thor, watched as shadows began to emerge from Loki's figure on the floor, darting around the room viciously.

More and more shadows continued to snake from him, as they gradually began to take on colour. The room around began to morph into a charred landscape, an almost post-apocalyptic atmosphere filling the air, as Loki remained hunched on the floor. The shadows around him flashed with the images of fighting, of battle, and the sound of fainted battle cries made themselves known. Thanos watched with interested and anticipating eyes as a particular shadow began to take on a humanoid form. Loki remained clutching his head, the blood from Drakav's claw still trickling down his hands, as it moved closer and closer to him.

It was beginning to take shape, but neither Thanos nor Thor could tell what it was yet. But to Loki, this was all that he knew to be real. This figure was his reality, this situation was all that he knew. He did not know that what lay before him were simply projections of his mind. To him, they were anything but. He was, quite literally, trapped within his own nightmare. His hands trembled as he lowered them from his face, which stared up at the figure before him. It regarded him silently, its silhouette deathly still amongst the ruins. Loki looked up, completely enveloped in Drakav's conjurement. "Thor" he whispered, his voice acute with despair. Thanos folded his arms contentedly as he watched, while, from his concealed position, Thor's heart jolted. The figure before Loki finally began to take shape, as sure enough, the holographic form of his brother took form before him. He unsheathed a knife from his belt and held it to Loki's throat, glaring at him with disgusted eyes. "Traitor."


	23. Break

**Thank you, thank you, thank you for reading! I'm hoping to wrap this story up soon, will hopefully have the time in the upcoming week to get another couple of chapters written and posted! I had to half this chapter, as it was a bit long, but because its 2am and ive got work, I will need to wait until tomorrow to post part 2! hope you dont mind! I love reading all your reviews, inspires me so much to keep going! So i thank you all again for that, and i hope you enjoy!x**

* * *

Loki could feel the metal against his skin as he looked back at the figure. It did not carry Mjolnir. "Thor, I-" "You destroyed everything" spat the holograph. "I believed in you, and in return you burned everything I ever had to the ground. For too long, you have brought nothing but death and misery upon me. Never again." The blade nicked Loki's throat. "I tried-" "You did not 'try'. You never did. You are a failure. You always have been." Loki's expression began to grow more and more unstable as his mind continued to unravel, spilling its contents into the world around him.

"I tried every waking day, Thor." Utterly immersed in the illusion, Loki's voice was tinged with a tone of such raw desperation, one that had not been heard from him in a long time. "With every bone in my body, I strove to be free of you. To be free of the love that still haunts my heart. But it stalks me, like a shadow beneath the sun. Everything I have done-" "_You_", breathed holograph Thor icily, "are incapable of love. You torment, and you ruin. Not a speck of goodness resides within you. Your heart is as black and ugly as this land you have destroyed. You are a monster, Loki. And you must be destroyed." Loki's hands rose to grapple with the holograph's, which was as corporeal to him as his own self. Hatred blazed behind its eyes, as Loki continued to hold back the hands that sought to slit his throat. "Thor" he gasped painfully. "We… are… brothers."

The holograph scoffed in revilement, as it looked into Loki's eyes. It had none of Thor's compassion, none of Thor's concern. And none of Thor's love. "_No_" it replied coldly. "As you made clear long ago, we are not. We never were. Through your deeds, I have finally seen what you really are. You are poison. And I would rather die than bind a snake like you to my name." Loki's head fell forward as tears began to form in his eyes, his scrambled mind blocking all attempts of rationality. "So… you are just going to kill me?" he finally asked breathlessly, his fingers still gripping the holograph's wrist. He could feel the skin beneath them. This was all too real to be a simple hallucination. His mind was spinning.

"Why would I not? You tried to do the same to me. Countable times. This is only justified." Loki watched the severity in Thor's expression, as his eyes pained. Yet something within himself objected; a little voice that gnawed at the back of his mind, fighting to be heard. _This is not your brother,_ it whispered, almost severely._ This is not Thor. The real Thor is not this efficient. The real Thor could never kill you, even if his life depended on it. THINK._ Loki shook his head clear, as the holograph pushed forward, forcing him backwards in retaliation. The knife still searched for his throat. He was losing the will to keep it back. "Don't you see?" the holograph sneered; an expression that was so wrong for Thor's face that it almost caused Loki to jolt. "This is how it ends." It gestured to the wasteland around them.

"There is no escaping it. This is what you chose. Your heart was hardened long ago, and you cared nothing for the cost, or how high it grew. And now, I have been left with no choice but to do the same. I care for nothing. You should be pleased." It smirked, as Loki lost it, allowing his voice to reach the pitch of a scream in reply. "I NEVER WANTED THIS!" "Never wanted what?" replied the holograph coolly, as it lowered the knife to force Loki's face closer. "Never wanted me to become as cruel as you?" It laughed mockingly. "That time has been and gone. What else did you expect would happen? It is only fair to fight fire with fire, after all. Except there is still one distinction between you and I." Its eyes darkened, as Loki remained motionless, hypnotised by the situation.

"You go to your death now, utterly unloved. I want you to know that. Every wisp of memory; every soul that once held affection for you, now fills up with pure loathing at the mere mention of your name. Including I. You will die; you will vanish into dust, and no one will ever mourn you. Not a single tear will be shed for your fate. Not a single heart will beat with fond memories of your life. You will be remembered only as a slave of evil; the nefarious villain of a story that future generations will tell their children. You shall be immortalized as the symbol of all that is wrong with the universe. Your death-day will be a celebration. And I will ensure it." The holograph leaned in even further towards Loki, whose features were paralysed in horror. "You are despicable. And you are alone." Loki's insides froze as he looked back into the holograph's eyes. They were serious. A tear slipped down Loki's cheek, as he cast his eyes down to his hands which still gripped Thor's wrist. His eyes lowered, as he removed them. I deserve this. I deserve it. No sooner than he had, the holograph's knife arm shot forwards, and all went black.

* * *

Thanos watched, entertained, as the holograph slashed Loki's throat. "Oh this is so much greater than meagre death!" he bellowed happily, as the vision promptly dissipated, returning the bedchamber to its original state. None of what had transpired was real, yet to Loki, it had been. He remained in his position on the floor, bent forward with his hands clasped around the invisible wound on his neck. Every now and again, a soft sob would escape him, only to be stifled in pain. The veil between his reality and the conjurment had been torn. Thanos began to circle him, staring down in mockery. "_That_ is your worst fear?" he drawled scathingly. "Pitiful."

Although the actual conjurement was gone, Loki could still feel its effects inside his head. It took every effort to pull his head up, which he somehow ordered himself to do. Flashes of the holograph and its hateful eyes stabbed his vision still, repeating over and over, as he leveled his head to look straight ahead of him. It was then, that he saw the real Thor, who was now almost fully visible through the opening in the wall. Thanos was too enraptured in Loki's predicament to have even sensed any kind of additional presence. Thor looked back at him wistfully, as Loki stifled a cry. Thor could tell from this reaction that the vision he had just witnessed had not yet left Loki's mind.

_It is not me, Loki._ He willed, hoping that somehow his brother could understand._ It is not real._ Loki's eyes began to narrow and open in alternative motions, as he struggled to focus what he was seeing. Thor's face remained determined._ Loki. It is not me. I am here. The other person you are seeing is an illusion. You know that. I would never…_ Thor inhaled to mediate himself. _It is not me, Loki._ Loki continued to stare at him, before removing his eyes to concentrate on the floor. Thanos still circled like a vulture. "It… cant be… real" Loki finally said slowly, pressing his palms against the floor.

"Oh, yet it is, dear Trickster. And it is in my power to ensure it stays that way. Although I must say, after seeing your fears, I feel a sudden sense of regret that I must kill you now. It would have been far more satisfying to watch your brother do it instead." Thanos smirked. Thor gritted his teeth in fury. "But alas, I cannot wait that long." Loki fought against the images in his head, as Thanos removed the slaying knife from his belt. As long as Thanos held sway over him, he would never truly be able to put up any kind of resistance. Break his power. Break his power. Break IT. Something within his mind hissed, as, through the corner of his eye, he registered the presence of his sceptre, which still lay at his side.

Seeing Thanos start towards his brother with the knife put an end to Thor's ability to withhold. He charged through the opening determinedly, no longer caring if he could be seen. Thanos burled around instantaneously, glaring at Thor with an almost thrilled rage. "Ah! In the flesh!I rather hoped that you would come!" he proclaimed energetically, as Mjolnir began to spark with electricity. Thanos laughed. "You realise it matters not what force you may inflict here. It is no use; for to him; this you is no longer a part of his reality" Thanos proclaimed conceitedly. "Your brother is bound to me. I have control, if I desire it. And it shall be mine, always."

"_No_" came a voice from behind Thanos' back, as Thor looked forward and behind him, his eyes widening. "_You will not_." Thanos turned to look over his shoulder, where Loki had pulled himself to his feet, his sceptre in his hands. "You are a simple fool if you believe you could cause me harm with my own weapon" scoffed Thanos condescendingly. But Thor could tell instantly what Loki planned to do. In this respect, Thanos was severely disadvantaged. He had seen this look on his brothers face before, only the last time, it had been given while suspended above an abyss. He remembered it all too well. Loki's eyes were resolute, even despite the images that were no doubt still attacking his vision. His action, when it came, was so quick, so sharp, that only Thor was able to cry out before it happened. "NO LOKI! YOU WILL DIE!" he screamed, as Thanos' head snapped from Loki, to Thor and back again, just in time to see Loki flip the sceptre in his hand and smash it with brute force onto the hard marble floor.

* * *

The spear snapped as the blue gem shattered into a thousand pieces, causing a subsequent blast of energy which tore through the room. In its path, it caught Thanos in the chest, sending him crashing backwards, where he slammed into one of the gold panel walls on the other side. Simultaneously, Thor leapt to avoid the blast radius, shielding himself from the falling debris with his hands. Squinting through the dust as it finally began to clear, Thor caught sight of Loki, who had been thrown onto his back, and was lying motionless on the ground a few feet away. Scrambling over the damage, Thor made his way frenetically towards him, forgetting completely that the sleeping Odin had also been in the room when the blast occurred. His breathing heavy, he staggered closer, his heart a lump in his chest.

Yet just before Thor was able to reach him, Loki unexpectedly erupted in a bout of coughs, pulling himself forwards to sit upright as he did so. Thor momentarily froze, astonished, before stooping onto his knees and shuffling as close to his brother as he could. Loki was still coughing violently, as Thor reached out an unsteady hand, placing it tentatively on his shoulder. Loki's breathing finally seemed to stabilize as he looked over at Thor in reaction to his touch. Around them, the shards of the blue gem from Loki's sceptre flickered weakly, before their light finally extinguished completely. "How did-" began Thor, before he cut off as he took notice of a change beginning to occur in Loki's face.

He did not utter a word, as Thor looked into his glacial eyes. It was then that Thor observed a strange movement within them, something that was not quite being controlled. His mouth almost dropped, as, in the most peculiar action he had ever witnessed, an injection of bottle green began to seep into both of Loki's eyes. Accompanied by a slight gasp from Loki as it happened, Thor watched, fascinated, as the colour spread and spread, until finally not a trace of blue remained. Loki blinked furiously as this occurred, and brought up a hand to rub his eyes afterwards, evidently signifying the discomfort of the experience. Thor exhaled sharply as Loki brought his head back up to look at him again, his eyes once again the colour of emeralds. They were the eyes that Thor had grown up with. Restored. Thanos' tesseractic influence over his brother had been severed.

A wash of something tantamount only to relief made its way over Thor, as he forced himself to stifle a smile. Seeing the suppression of delight in Thor's face, Loki's brow furrowed slightly, before he elected to punch Thor in the chest frivolously as he pulled himself to his feet. As both Gods brushed themselves down, Thor couldn't help but occasionally shoot Loki expressive glances, causing Loki to react all too defensively. "Don't" he said consciously, his attention swiftly becoming very focused on his surroundings.

Both Thor and Loki's eyes found the undisturbed form of their father at the same time, the glow around his bed evidently having protected him from all that had occurred. Thor glanced at his brother from the corner of his eye, noticing the somewhat strained expression on his face. He finally decided to speak. "Loki, destroying the sceptre should have killed you.." Loki rubbed his left arm fixatedly with his right as he replied. "That knowledge was only deemed fact by Thanos. I suspected as soon as he uttered the words that such a claim could well be mendacious in nature. Deployed to instill a fear within me that would prevent any attempts of opposition. It was reliant on chance, but I called his bluff. And my suspicions were proven correct. It takes one to know one."

Thor regarded Loki pensively, before both of their attentions were diverted to the crumbling sound of Thanos, dislodging himself from his place of landing across the room. "So the boy_ is_ sharper than he would have had me believe" he snorted hoarsely, as he straightened up. Loki merely maintained a stony glare in his direction, a reply mirrored in kind by Thor. Thanos regarded them with a placid countenance. "_How touching_" he sneered, cracking his neck disconcertingly. "Brothers reunited. Warms the cockles of the heart." Thor and Loki deliberately did not break Thanos' gaze, or allow any kind of reaction to form in their expressions in response to his taunt. Without any previous consultation, their defences were staggeringly identical. Thanos began to snigger, so vigorously that his mulberry face seemed to turn a shade darker.

"OH! But then there is that meddlesome matter of your blood!" he exclaimed grandly, bringing his hand to his chin in mock concern. "So sorry to cut the reunion short, but I still need it.." He shook his head, maintaining his play of distress. "And now that big brother is here… well it would just be rude to exclude him from the fun would it not? Moreover, surplus is always appreciated." His eyes were gleaming with enthusiasm. Thor and Loki remained dually nonchalant, as Loki finally spoke, his voice calm.

"I am no longer chained to your influence. Your magic is great, but no greater than mine at its full functionality. A level which I have now reclaimed. So you may make an attempt to shed my blood, but I fear such an act may be fruitless. For now, I can retaliate." Loki's eyes were glinting with malice. Thanos stared him down, the beginnings of a smirk forming on his face. Loki inhaled. "And… as for my brother.." Thor's heart missed a beat as the word came from Loki's lips, and he had to fight to prevent the shock from visualizing in his face as Loki turned to glance at him impassively, before returning his eyes to Thanos. "Well. His reputation speaks for itself."


	24. The Trade

**The next part as promised! :) Your reviews are so lovely, makes me so giddy to see and read them, so again I gotta say thank you! It is my catchphrase on the internet! ;) haha, hope you like!x**

* * *

Thanos regarded them for a moment, before erupting in fits of malevolent laughter. "Very true, very true.." he chortled, as he took a few steps into the centre of the room. "But... OH!" he suddenly proclaimed in a lurid tone, raising a hand to his ear derisively. "What is that I hear?" He spoke aloud to an invisible listener. Thor and Loki watched him, unamused, but with a hint of concern becoming evident in both their faces. "Drat! I do believe I have leverage that may dissuade you from such actions!" The brothers regarded him, their expressions askance. "You lie" snapped Thor angrily. Loki, however, said nothing in return, feeling a dreaded sensation come over him instead as his face dropped.

"May I?" Thanos asked perkily, gesturing to the door with his right hand. Thor and Loki remained on guard, as Thanos proceeded to knock, without clarification, on the still attached golden door to the chamber. It promptly opened, as a Chituari marched through, dragging the writhing form of Frigga behind it. It grunted ferally, as it tossed Frigga across into Thanos' arms, where he held her fast in front of him, wrapping his huge arms around her neck. Thor and Loki's faces sank in mutual expressions of horror.

"You were supposed to escort her to safety!" Loki snapped angrily out of the corner of his mouth to Thor, who replied, equally offended; "I _did._ She was safe on the passage to Vanaheim when I left her in the protection of a Vanir sentry!" "Now, now, children!" cooed Thanos cockily, as he continued to keep his hold on the struggling Frigga, whose eyes lamented the sight of her children beginning to spar yet again. "Fret not, for I have a few contacts in the Vanir army. A debt had to be collected. And now the fate of mummy dearest rests in my all too capable hands." Thor and Loki tore their eyes from each other, directing them back to Thanos, and allowing the abrupt tension between them to dissipate.

Thanos grinned. "I do believe it is time to do what I do best. I believe a bargain is in order." Loki's fists clenched at his sides, as Thor gripped Mjolnir even tighter. Thanos pulled Frigga tighter, using his other hand to loutishly brush back her hair from her face. "Shall we say… a litre, for the life of your mother?" Thor and Loki's faces were both rigid, as they both stepped forward, almost immediately "Be not of haste" said Thanos, his arm shooting out in front of him to signal them to halt. "A litre from _each_ of you." "You already have a sample of Thor's blood" interjected Loki stiffly. "Such a demand is unnecessary." Thanos looked at him.

"I do. And such would have been efficient to meet my ends, but with such an opportunity before me, it is better to be safe than sorry. As I said, excess is always appreciated, and will most likely quicken the extraction in any case." He smirked, as Thor and Loki stood, unyielding. "Or alternatively" he said slyly, turning his attention to Thor. "You can give me all of Loki's." His face suddenly became severe. "Let me spill the lot like I intended, and I will allow yourself and your mother to flee." Frigga moved to make a sound in protest, but it was stifled by Thanos' hand. _"Never"_ replied Thor dangerously, as he stared Thanos down. Loki shot him a perturbed glance as he did so.

"More fool you. Very well then. " smiled Thanos, returning his attention to the both of them. "A litre of shed blood from each." His eyes brightened as he directed his following statement at Loki, as well as downwards to Frigga. "_Oh_! How could I forget to disclose, for the sake of our dear thunder god, the reason why I seek such a prize?" His mouth curved widely, as Thor maintained a curious look at Frigga, before glancing at Loki, who was gazing at the floor. Thanos chuckled.

"The blood of the House of Odin, of those whom he loves, is the only means by which his shields can be deconstructed. And subsequently, his assailant may possess-" "The Odinforce" Thor cut in, anger staining his expression. "That is what you have been seeking…" "Commendations, noble prince" taunted Thanos sarcastically. "This final ingredient is all I need." "But, Father's defences are strong. There is no way you could have discovered-" "Not at all!" proclaimed Thanos exuberantly. "I cannot claim universal credit for such an achievement! The exploitation of the Allfather was not my doing, sadly. You have your precious sibling to thank for that."

Thor turned slowly to look at Loki, his questioning expression regarding him deniably. Loki would not meet his eyes. Thor looked away sorrowfully as he understood. "Apologies. I digress. Pressing on.." said Thanos brightly, extending his hand. "Your blood for her life. Your Father for your Mother. Do we have an accord?" Thor and Loki looked at each other again, as Thor registered something in his brothers eyes. A suggestion of regret? He couldn't be entirely sure. He turned to look at Odin, and thought of everything that had transpired over the last couple of years. Odin was to blame. A part of him loathed the man. There was no such presence within him towards his mother. He could not let her die.

Loki reached out his hand first, placing it on top of Thanos'. He had made a deal with him before; he knew how it worked. Thor looked at him for a moment, and then at the desperate face of his mother. "You will not harm her.." Thanos smiled. "You have my word." Thor's face hardened with his decision, as he moved forward, placing his own hand on top of his brothers. Thanos' hand was so large that it made Thor and Loki's look like that of two small children. Frigga was shaking her head desperately, trying to say something, as Thanos spoke aloud. "The deal is struck!" Thor and Loki removed their hands, as Thanos re-produced the slaying knife from his person.

"Shed that of each other. Upon him" he said, suddenly very serious, his voice underlying with sadism as he handed Loki the blade. The brothers slowly and reluctantly complied, as they both made their way to Odin's bedside. Frigga's cries behind them were muffled. As they looked down at Odin's sleeping form, Thor held out his arm before Loki. He regarded him with stable eyes, as he nodded. With the same candour, Loki proceeded to slice the blade over Thor's wrist, neglecting to even blink. Turning the knife in his hand as Thor allowed his cut wrist to bleed through the coffin of light and onto Odin's chest, Loki handed it to him, as he pulled up his sleeve and held out his own arm in return. Promptly swallowing his initial hesitation, Thor proceeded to do the same to Loki, who likewise held the wound over Odins's sleeping form.

A few moments passed, as Thor, Loki, and indeed Thanos, waited. It seemed like nothing was going to happen. Thor and Loki looked over at each other, puzzled. And then, the light around Odin began to flicker, causing Thor and Loki to stand back, before it died altogether. Loki remembered this from before. Yet it had not taken so long. And Odin still had to be physically slain. Which he was no longer able to do. Thanos bellowed with delight; "Well? Complete our bargain! Slay him and your mother will be free!" Thor looked over at Loki, still holding the knife in his hands. Loki's expression gave nothing to indicate whatever emotions he may have been having. Within himself, Thor sighed.

Cautiously, he finally held the blade over Odin. His arms were unsteady, as the second in the progression of Odin's two sons stood with a blade above his heart. Loki swallowed as he watched, knowing full well Thor's inability to execute the act, as well as he knew his own. Behind them, Thanos finally sighed impatiently, as, with a flick of his wrist, he sent the knife flying from Thor's hand and into Odin's chest.

* * *

Thor screamed aloud in anguish. Loki simply stood frozen, his face completely still with masked shock. "My apologies. I do revere the theatrical, as you well know, but my patience has now ran dry." Thor and Loki remained where they were, looking at the knife embedded in Odin's chest as Thanos' voice reached them. It was then that an effervescent glow began to become apparent beneath the wound, growing brighter and brighter. In all their lives, neither Thor nor Loki had ever seen the power of Odin manifested. Now here it was before them. Seeing the light grow brighter and brighter, Thanos yelped with delight, as he threw Frigga carelessly onto the floor before him, charging towards Odin's bedside.

Thor immediately moved to go to his mothers aid, but Loki remained still, transfixed, as he looked upon Odin's body. Thanos reached his side, grinning with satisfaction as he extended an arm to grip the handle of the knife. "Loki. _Loki_" came Thor's voice urgently, as he pulled on his brothers sleeve. "We must get Mother out of here" Loki's trance was broken, but he still remained slightly dazed with disbelief as he allowed Thor to pull him away from the bed and over to Frigga. She was sobbing as her sons bent down to look over her. "It is over" she could only say weakly, as she gripped both of their hands hard.

As a testament to the nature of Asgard's royal family, as the three of them squatted on the floor, bloodied and amongst the dirt and dust, they appeared more united than they had been in a very long time. As Frigga continued to sob, the ground began to tremble. Thor and Loki looked up in dread, as they witnessed the searing light of the Odinforce drill its way into Thanos with the strength of a hundred volcanoes, building and building in intensity. Frigga's sons frantically pulled her to her feet, Loki taking the weight on her left side onto his shoulder and Thor her right.

The light had almost reached full capacity, as a wailing noise made itself known, becoming higher and higher in frequency, until it began to crack the very walls, subsequently causing Thor, Loki and Frigga's hearing to be temporarily lost. They squinted at each other, as Thor shouted, though no one was able to hear. _"What do we do?!"_ Loki could just make out the basics of what Thor was trying to communicate by reading his lips, before the silence gradually began to retreat, as the light built closer to its climax.

Thanos was 90% charged with the Odinforce, the most powerful agent that any of them had heard of. Frigga repeated Thor's words as she glanced at her two sons. "What can we do?" she squeaked exhaustedly. Thor watched as Loki began to finally engage with his surroundings. "The only thing we can do here and now" he said resolutely, as he swivelled around to face the door, his actions mirrored by Thor, as the light swelled to its highest capacity. "We run."


End file.
